Still Calling

Nobody Knows You When You’re Down and Out

Guys, shed a tear for Pat McCrory. Shed a single, crystal tear with a unicorn on a rainbow reflected in it.

Former Gov. Pat McCrory says the backlash against House Bill 2 is making some employers reluctant to hire him but he’s currently doing consulting and advisory board work.

McCrory has been appearing frequently in interviews with national media outlets to defend the controversial LGBT law, but he hasn’t announced what’s next for his career. In a podcast interview recently with WORLD, an Asheville-based evangelical Christian news website, McCrory talked about his challenges on the job market.

The former Republican governor says HB2 “has impacted me to this day, even after I left office. People are reluctant to hire me, because, ‘oh my gosh, he’s a bigot’ – which is the last thing I am.”

Dear Pat:

I am not at all surprised by your problems.

Putting aside whether you’re REALLY a bigot (and folks, he is) or whether you just play one on TV, here’s a fun little factoid. When you go out of your way to make yourself the very public face of anti-gay bigotry by passing laws that hurt gay and transgender people, you are going to have problems finding a job in the private sector. Those difficulties will have nothing to do with the fact that you’re perceived as an unpleasant, hateful, intolerant person (although you are, in fact, unpleasant, hateful, and intolerant, which is why neither you nor your long-suffering wife have any friends anymore).

No, your problems stem from the fact that most large companies -especially the prestigious firms where a former governor would otherwise be more than welcome- have well-developed, established company policies prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation. Your presence would immediately cause a disruption among employees and customers, leading to a backlash against whoever hired you. And backlashes… well, they affect the bottom line, Pat.

You say “academic leaders ‘have shown reluctance'” to hire you as a part-time professor, what with your degrees in education and political science. In fact, you are a failure in both occupations you ostensibly studied for. Your relentless crusade against gay and transgender people renders you unfit to be an educator, while the way you aided and abetted the destruction of your political career shows you know fuck-all about political science.

Just look at your record. Maybe your jihad against transgender and LGBTQ children was nothing more than politics, meant to placate the wingnuts in the North Caroline statehouse. But that’s not how anyone outside that bubble sees it. I can’t imagine any school -whether a university or public or private high school- hiring you, given that a LOT of people now identify as gay or transgender in their teens (as I’m sure you know). What reasonable expectation of your fair, impartial treatment could a gay or transgender student presume, given your deliberate actions as governor of a large state to curtail their rights? You would be an unnecessary distraction and damage the reputation of any academic institution you were involved with. That’s the price you pay for being publicly controversial, I’m afraid. I’m sure you and Richard Spencer could commiserate over a few beers.

Yes yes: I’m sure you’ve got some free speech arguments to make, complaining about how “having people purged due to political thought”is SO UNFAIR. But Pat, as you well know, free speech arguments don’t really apply to private institutions. The First Amendment protects you from GOVERNMENT interference with your free speech: it does not mean that you are free from any and all consequences of your words. I mean, let’s substitute the words “race or religion” into this little quote:

“There’s an expectation of privacy for the other girls or other boys in their junior high locker rooms or shower facilities, that the only other people coming into there are people of the same gender race or religion, or built as the same gender race or religion,” he said. “We need to work through these problems and not throw hand grenades at this issue because it’s a new, sensitive issue on all sides.”

I understand it’s hard to have your own words thrown back in your face like this, and it’s hard to look in the mirror and see yourself as you really are and not as you wish you were, but Pat: you brought all of this on yourself.

For the record, I wouldn’t hire you as janitor. But if you listen my advice, you’ll go look for work with the American Family Association, the Family Research Council, Family Research Institute, or Westboro Baptist. Sure, you’d be working for a designated hate group, but at least it’d be an income and you can always make new friends to replace the ones you’ve lost.

But for cryin’ out loud, Pat: man up, already. This whining about how it’s all SO UNFAIR is bullshit, especially from a conservative. Don’t y’all believe in “personal responsibility” and “pulling yourself up by your bootstraps”?

Quit your complaining and get a job, deadbeat.

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