Hi guys. This is where I confess to feeling extremely idiotic for some months now, and hope someone out there can say, ‘Hey! That was me, too!’, but if not, that’s okay. 😉
Like many folks, I recently discovered my passion for politics. Or, more accurately, my passion for seeing this country keep from going to total shit. That was about a year and a half ago – or so – and I’ve been on a tare ever since. Finding information. Learning things I do not know. Educating myself. But, when I first found political sites and blogs (like Kos), they scared me half to death.
Why? Well, because I felt like I had nothing to say or add. I loved reading the diaries, the stories, the commentary, all of it – but felt I couldn’t contribute. All those folks at Kos were so smart, so educated, so knowing, so self-aware…it was extremely intimidating, and still is. I feel like I cannot measure up to what those folks know. I’m not near as politically active. I don’t have a lot of time in my personal life to get out there and pound the pavement and ‘do my part’. I just care, that’s all. I just think Bush is a complete tool, like they all do. I want to know if there is anything at all I can do to help change things. I’ve learned a lot. A LOT. More than I can ever say – and mostly because of those fine folks at Kos (and those here, as well – who I first read at Kos) and what they know.
Having said all that, I rarely post – there or any other political site I visit. That intimidation thing again. The fear of being called an asshat idiot. Occasionally, I’ll post something – but mostly in comments, and it’s usually pretty inane. So, I got to feeling like there wasn’t much point for me to hang around, because I felt like the country cousin. But, I did, dammit. I’m still hanging around, still learning. I just ain’t talking. 😉
But, I found this place – and the smaller, more intimate feel (not to mention the superb Deadwood thread on the front page) makes me so much more comfortable. I can speak out a little more and not feel like there are untold hordes of people reading my little rants and whatnot and thinking I’m a complete dweeb.
Although you may still indeed think that, please don’t shatter my newfound confidence, ‘kay?
Anyway, the point to all this mindless rambling is: did you feel this way when you ventured into the ‘political world’? Was it hard to dip your feet in the water? Is it still? Do you also sometimes feel that you don’t know near as much as you should and admire those that you think do? What have you learned that you didn’t know before visiting political sites?
I guess I just figure that if I felt this way, there are others that did/do too, and maybe it’d make some of us feel better if we know we’re not alone.
Okay, enough from me for now. Thanks for a nice new home to visit, Booman and company.
I posted a diary once in Kos, and found Kos beat me on the front page on the same topic (a quick paragraph, where mine was an in depth analysis of the GAO document in question). I was asked to delete my diary and post it as a comment on Kos’s front page diary (then well down towards the bottom of the page).
I know it shouldn’t have, but it irritated me. Every time I have the urge to write a diary there, I am reminded that someone will almost assuredly typed something first, which relegates all comments to be defined (framed) in the context of the original diary. (in other words, I don’t want to hijack someone else’s diary).
So, I respond to the original diary, but no longer put the thought and effort necessary to write a quality diary.
Maybe I am just too meek. :-/
I don’t blame you for being irritated. I would have been irate. I hope you refused to delete it.
I really hope we don’t get into hyper “Breaking News” activity here. I want more reasoned essays and considerations of current events instead of breathless, outraged reactions.
nah, I dumped it.
If I can find my copy of the report though, I might be able to rewrite it as a diary here 🙂
I assiduously search the Kos diaries before I post something. And so I did a week ago or so, and I set to work on an important (to me) new diary titled, “The U.S. Army’s Own Docs Detail Horrific Prisoner Abuse & Murder.” I keep checking to make sure no one else has beat me to it. I go through the NYTimes main article, paragraph by paragraph, drawing on my resources from past diaries and saved stories…. I post the diary.
I wait. I drink coffee and Web browse, pretending I don’t care if anyone notices the damn diary I’ve just spent two solid hours on, and countless hours prior in researching the topics.
Then IT appears. Armando posts the NYTimes story … about 4 big paragraphs from the NYT + a short paragraph. In the middle column.
So I’m going nuts. Then, I made myself stop and say to myself, it doesn’t matter. It’s not important. What matters is that the story gets out. But I did open A’s story and all I did was post this, with no Subject title or any comment: diary. It was the first post in A’s story.
I chill. Take a shower. Feed the cats. Refresh Kos and my diary is in the recommended list. I dunno why. With not many recommends at that point (much later on, there were lots of recommends.) It was all weird. And I’d have never minded if the headline story had been more than a cut-and-paste from the NYTimes, which any monkey can do. Or analyzed, as countless people can do on Kos infinitely better than I can. But that experience had an effect on me.
You, along with the diarist, pretty much summed up my reasons for lurking so long at Kos. Man – the number of times I openly cringed when a diarist was “spanked” for allegedly duplicating a post. (My comments are in no way meant to rip on anyone at Kos – I’m just stating my observations.)
FWIW, I feel compelled to say this, Susan. I’ve consistently been impressed with your writing, and you evolved into one of the writers who drew me to Kos on a daily basis. Your time and effort were self evident in the quality of your work, and your passion just served to add that extra bonus component.
Having said that, I hope you’re enjoying the front page. You’ve earned it.
your passion comes through beautifully.
we are all experts at something, no-nothings on other issues, and we can all talk a line of crap about one thing or another.
Write a diary about what you know. Everyone here is willing to learn something.
I’m a voracious reader. That’s something I could talk about. 😉
I know exactly what you mean, in your first comment. Things move so fast, and different people talk about the same things so often, that sometimes you feel like you’re just wasting your time. I’m looking forward to being able to follow a slower pace here.
Thanks for the comments, B!
That would be great diary. What books you’ve been influenced by or reading just for fun. If there is a heaven it’s a libray.
I think it would be nice if we posted book and movie reviews. I mean, all of life is NOT politics and it might do us all some good to explore our culture together.
Thanks for the suggestions, chocolate ink and sjct. I’d love to see a book/movie review thread. Something light and entertaining is sometimes just what the doctor ordered.
I’m pretty much a movie freak(except horror films-too susceptible to nightmares) and would love a movie and book review diary. Somewhere where ideas on books and movies exchanged. Movies shape so much of our culture or reflect it that in it’s own way even the most inane movie therefore could be considered political I suppose.
Besides books for fun, humor or enjoyment, there are some great political writers/observers out there like Molly Ivins.
Have been for a while. You must have written something i respected 🙂
You know, that really means a lot to me, truly. I don’t know what it was that caught your attention, but damn, I’m glad I wrote it! 😉
…and I’m better at being a written loudmouth than a spoken loudmouth.
But please, don’t let someone like me stop you from participating. There are times even I don’t fully know what I’m talking about.
I never shut up, but am much quieter when it comes to writing. 😉
Thank you, grannyhelen. I sometimes don’t know what I’m talking about either, so I’m glad to know I’m in good company!
I’m not exactly loud, but definitely a talker – I just can’t shut up. When I found dKos, I was instantly irritated that I couldn’t post comments immediately. Signed on the first time I visited, I think, and was really impatient to have to wait 24 hours.
When I got my first 4 on a comment, I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. (“You like me! You really like me!”) Just a few 4’s here and there, and eventually TU status, kept me going on the commenting.
But as I spent more time there, I got intimidated enough to not be brave about posting an actual diary. My first and only diary I posted here last Sunday. Nice feedback from Susan emboldened my to post it on dKos. Kind of a breakthrough.
So far, I’m really liking it here at the Frogpond (as I’ve taken to calling it in my own head).
I hope to write more here. I’d like to do several on why I teach at a community college, why I love teaching at a community college, and why community colleges are a progressive issue. But I’m currently writing several hours a day on projects for my students, so finding the time for diary-ing is hard . . .
I felt exactly like you. I spent over 3 years reading Kos daily before I ever signed up and made any comments at all. I was incredibly intimidated by much of the collective intelligence there in the diarists and the comments people posted. I never thought myself particulary stupid but boy I felt that way reading a lot of the diaries and commments over there.
I’ve been fairly interested in politics for many years however the advent of the internet really changed things for me. Having access to so much information is like having your own private library of congress. We can find out almost anything on the net and become so much better informed. Whats best is that many diarists have their areas of expertise or interest that they write on making us the better and more informed because of them. And I thank each and everyone one of them for making me smarter, more informed and able to talk intelligently on a lot more issues than would have ever been possible before the internet.
And finding out that the more you learn the more you don’t know. The conundrum for me is that while I appear to know more I realize just how little I do know.
There is nothing magical or special about “politics”. It used to be considered just a normal part of a citizen’s life.
It is unfortunate that our culture has made political activism some kind of special category, removed from the mundane. Politics is life, life is politics. It is just the mechanism by which humans, organized in societies for mutual benefit, work things out. No need to be intimidated.
Welcome.
You’re right – it shouldn’t be anything intimidating or special, and I don’t feel that way here.
I appreciate the welcome!
Back in colonial days people used to go to pubs, get sloshed and complain about King George. Now that I think about it, some things never change. Now we do it over DSL, cable, telephone, and wireless — from home, work, or a pub.
What’s different for me now more than ever before is trying to keep up with the dirty tricks of the congressional sessions – as presented in the 142 page document. Call me naive, but I never noticed this level of evil gamesmanship before. In light of that, I’ve had to expend a great deal of time and energy just keeping up with the legal system. (As in – WTF? How can they possibly get away with that?)
is that now true believers are in charge.
Before, we just had to deal with old-fashioned greed, corruption and mendacity.
I agree with most of the comments made on this page. I felt the same way as other regarding DK and the intimidation factor and the flames. I was hoping that I would not see that here and then Sun. someone posted this diary about “Confessions of a Liberal Ex Gay” and he was attacked for his views and opinions. The discussion decended into a top or bottom feud. I was intimindated so much by the comments that I felt reluctant to even try to defend the diarest.
That was just when I was about to post my first diary and changed my mind. I feel that when someone is making comments about his or her own personal views or experiences, the attack mode just doesn’t make sense and is counter-productive. We must allow others to express their views, I think, whether we agree or not.
I am going to lay back for awhile and see how it goes before I post a diary.
Hey, I am sweating just posting this and ready to hit the delete button, but here goes, I’ll hit the post.
I would love to read about something that interests you, catches your attention, enrages you, or inspires you.
If I can do it, so can you! 😉
Thanks for the encouragement Mindmouth. I have one rolling around in my mind for weeks now that I would like to get out of my head.
I’m going to edit your sig so that it is an active hyperlink. I hope you don’t mind. If you want it changed back just tell me.
great, thanks, I think you are great booman, very helpful, and please check out my diary just posted.
Thanks to you mindmouth, I have just posted my first ever diary, called “converting the red into purple.” Please check it out.
You did give me the courage to do it.
I’m glad that, if nothing else, my little diary brought you out of hiding to post some diaries for us! I’m going to check it out right now.
I think your actions will have a positive impact on several of us, Mindmouth. Especially since you’ve already carved your own little niche with the “Book & Film Fest”. I say a tip o’ the hat is in order here.
As a side note to Diane: In reference to Sunday’s diary, I didn’t stick around long enough to see the place go up in flames, but I hope you don’t use that diary as a typical example in which to base your comfort level for posting diaries. That whole situation was rather peculiar, and I chose to leave the building when I got the first hint of smoke.
Thank you so much for that, Anomalous. You’ve made my day. 🙂
I hope I wasn’t one of the people on the diary of ‘confessions of liberal ex gay’ your talking about. I tried to post to his idea or feelings while trying very hard to understand him. I think part of that was because he seemed ambigious himself to some extent.
The whole top/bottom thing did though seem to be kinda the crux of his whole decision which is why I commented on it. Please let me know if you think I did it in a respectful way while still disagreeing with what he seemed to be saying.?
Now I’ll go check out your diary.
Hi chocolate, I went back and looked at your commnents and didn’t find them out of line. It was the other poster who called him on this (?) right away and I could not figure where it came from. The diary as written was merely about his own experience, I thought, and did not mention this top or bottom thing, that I could find and the commenter just kept pushing this subject.
And yes I thought your comments were made in a very respectful way, so no worries there.
thanks for answering. I had problems trying to really understand his point of view but hoped he would continue discussion. Problems simply stemming from trying to change who you are in the first place. But it gave me a lot to think about which is always good.
just because you never wrote about politics before. When I started posting at Kos I found that the most difficult part of posting was trying to write something that was well organized and makes sense — and doing that in a few moments so that my post would fit into the conversation. Prior to finding Kos, my only similar experience had been posting on the Yahoo and AOL message boards. When I found Kos I posted at my first opportunity and I stuck around there and ventured to other blogs and forums (sometimes posting, oftentimes lurking — such as in freeperland) because I like to converse with other people who are political junkies and activists and just read about what people think about and care about. My wife and family, and many of my friends, hate talking about anything political so the blogosphere is my outlet.
As for diaries, when I bother to write a diary at Kos I don’t care if I get any recommends, comments, etc… I’m writing because at that moment I felt something was important enough to me to share my point of view. If nobody else cares, oh well. I’m not looking for validation from anybody. Besides, for a while it seemed that a lot of initial diaries on a subject at Kos (and the duplicates) amounted to nothing more than – find article – cut’n’paste – make a short comment and slap the word ‘Breaking’ in the title. I don’t think much Pulitzer Prize material appeared in those ‘shorts’.
I do not have much time to sit and write diaries and I most enjoy making comments to threads anyway.
That said, I agree that there are enough self-appointed diary police over there who, if you let them get to you, make you want to not even bother sharing your thoughts with that crowd.
I got my experience posting at Yahoo message boards, as well, years ago. From there, I ventured to other message boards centered around things I was interested in. When I found Kos, I thought, ‘Hallelujah! Two great things together – posting and politics!’ But, it wasn’t near as easy as I thought it’d be – this coming from a mouthy broad, as I admittedly am.
I did stick my toes in the water soon enough, and now I’ve probably got my legs all the way in, but I think I’m still afraid to lower my whole body in there. 😉
Not that I have ever posted a diary at dkos but comment all the time(probably too much) but I had noticed especially since gannongate broke that someone would write a fabulous diary and bing! 1/2 hour later kos or Armando would have a three line diary with a link to story in gray box. I didn’t even write the diary and I thought it was shitty. If everyone else should go through the diaries before posting their own shouldn’t the frontpagers do that too? IMHO
Now don’t get me wrong I love dkos and that community with all my heart. I have learned so much since last year when I first came around because my son suggested it to get information. I dream of all the diaries I am going to write but have always felt afraid to do so. Maybe I will get the guts up to do so here.
This is a great site and I am a huge fan of the frontpagers and all who have the courage to write diaries. Keep on inspiring me to be a better activist folks!
Thank you so much for posting this diary. You’ve have inspired me to finally write a diary that I’ve been thinking about ever since I saw Shaun of the Dead.
I, too, feel very intimidated over at dKos. In the 6 months or so that I’ve been a member there (after lurking for about that long without signing up) I can still only manage to post comments. Of course I still have a little panic attack every time I hit the post button, but I’m working on becoming more confident.
Like you, I wasn’t too terribly political up until my brother was sent to Iraq in March of 2003. After he left, politics were suddenly very interesting; to the point that I spent 2004 founding a PAC and organizing a four day music festival/political fundraiser headlined by Pearl Jam. My friends and I knew absolutely nothing about political fundraising (the learning curve was steep – to say the least), but we ended up giving away $60,000 to various candidates and causes.
After finishing up with our festival, I decided that I wanted to become more informed about the process while I saved money and prepared for law school. The blogs have been a great place to see what people are talking about and, especially, how they’re talking about it. They were also a great place to go after the election when the depression set in.
I really appreciate the laid-back atmosphere on this site; the aggressiveness on dKos is a little much sometimes.
That would make a great diary. How you went from not being political or just the mechanics of how you managed to set up the whole festival. Might inspire other people to get out there and get involved.
I hope your brother is doing well.
and will most likely, at some point, write a series of diaries about our experiences. We learned so much – about each other, about ourselves, more than any of us ever wanted to know about campaign finance law (especially me -I’m the treasurer), recruiting & managing volunteers…in short, grassroots organizing in all of its imperfect glory with rock star egos thrown in just to make it interesting.
Thanks for asking about my brother. He returned home safe in September of 2003, he’s now getting ready to leave his wife and 3 kids (one of whom is a toddler) to go to Korea for a year. At least it’s not Iraq. My sister in law and I came close to having nervous breakdowns worrying about him when he was there.
So glad to hear he came home safely. (my brother was in Vietnam and was medic in Saigon but can’t say he escaped completely from any damage as he still doesn’t really talk about Vietnam).
I’d love to read about your firsthand experience on this whole subject so do hope you will get around to doing a series on it.
I, like chocolate ink, would love to read about your personal experience getting involved in politics. I’d also love to hear more about your brother, and how his service affected you and your family. I’m glad to hear he made it home safely, and won’t be going back to Iraq again. I will keep him and his family in my prayers.
You’ve gotten some great comments on this thread already.
Just keep in mind that we are all learning. Yep, even the really smart people. Maybe especially the really smart ones.
And have to time when to jump in, when two other kids were swinging the rope? Or two ropes, each going an opposite direction! And sometimes loads of other kids, all timing the ropes to see when to jump in at the same time.
That’s the feeling I had trying to post on high traffic sites like kos, especially as my style of writing, as far as I even have one, isn’t “Boom! Bang! Look!”, no matter how much I may wish it were ;).
Also, it seems I’ve been immersed in politics for years, since I first noticed the truly vicious right wing attacks on Clinton, but I’ve never really been very political. My only real interest in politics, as probably is the case for others, is how they can be used to achieve what I think is needed. Thus, since I am more interested in social justice and anti poverty, education and so on, I realized that nothing long lasting would be accomplished in those matters until we get some courageous and principled politicians into office. Which, of course, means getting many Republicans out ;). And working on the Democrats and the party, as well.
I’m glad of this place, I think it has a great start, a really nice and responsive host, and will grow to fit all of us and our personalities. And the decor is great; already the walls are covered with emerging wallflowers who will soon come to full bloom. What more could one ask? (I’m sure we’ll find out).
If we don’t have social justice in all those areas, every area then we ‘got nuthing’ as Jon Stewart might say. And republicans just don’t ‘do’ social justice, unless you want to call executions social justice.(I don’t)
No, I don’t consider execution social justice ;). I’m firmly anti death penalty, and while on that topic I think our prisons are a disgrace (and a danger to the greater population, as well, the way they are run now).
The whole prison conglomerate here is so incredibly screwed up itself(dehibilitation instead of rehabilitation) to say nothing of the drug laws that put so many in prison when they shouldn’t be. We’ll end up one big penal colony or gambling casino soon if we can’t find a way to change things.
I share the trepidition you express in this diary. I’m new at Kos and can’t imagine posting a diary. One, it’s a time factor, two, I think I know a lot of things but I don’t feel like an expert on any topic. I’ll get over it, one day.
By the way, thanks for pimping your blog today on Kos. I forgot the URL and had not saved it in my favorites. Please don’t stop pimping. You’ve developed a wonderful, comfortable site.
I remember you from Kos – I replied to a question you had earlier in the week. 😉
I’m glad to see you here! Please jump in and write a diary for us, on anything you’d like to talk about. I’m no expert on anything either, and the comments in my diary here have showed me that that’s okay! We’d just love to hear your thoughts and your voice on anything that interests you. I’ll be looking forward to a diary from you soon!
Hey Mindmouth:
Yup, you did help me on Kos. I use your tips all the time now. Thanks. These sites are nice because I just learn so much. For me, Kos is like being at the grown-up table on Thanksgiving. I feel the need to be smart on Kos, unless I’m in C&J. Perhaps I should put the murder mysteries down and do some serious reading.
Booman site let’s me sit at the kiddie table and not be as intimidated (thank you Booman and in no way am I putting down this site).
I’ll try my hand at a diary as time permits (I am at work, no home computer). Thanks for the encouragement and the Diary that says what many feel.
I relate to your comments and am inspired by your diary as well. I haven’t found my voice so to speak. I’d rather someone ignore a diary than flame me to pieces (I’m SO sensitive!!)
And thanks to BooMan for the atmosphere.