With apologies to my mother. I promised her I wouldn’t be stridently partisan. So, I’ll just get this out of my system, and I promise to behave myself from now on.
1. Robert “Bob” Novak TRAITOR
2. George “Dubya” Bush CHIMP
3. Richard “Dick” Cheney PUPPY KILLER
4. Tom DeLay BUG KILLER
5. John Ashcroft CROONER
6. Denny Hastert PIG WRESTLER
7. Douglas Feith TRAITOR
8. Ann Coulter LIBERALS ARE TERRORISTS
9. Rush Limbaugh BIG FAT IDIOT
10. Bill O’Leilly FALAFEL IN THE SHOWER
11. Rick Santorum FECAL MATTER
12. Karl Rove GOEBBELS
13. Zell Miller BENEDICT ARNOLD
14. Sean Hannity LYING SCUM
15. Jerry Falwell BLAMES AMERICA FIRST, REALLY REALLY FIRST
16. Pat Robertson AGREES WITH FALWELL
17. Richard Perle SATAN’S MINION
18. Clarence Thomas SLAP THIS IN THE VCR, OR WAS IT A BETA?
19. Katherine Harris CRUELLA DeVIL
20. Newt Gingrich I CAN’T BE WITH A WOMAN WHO HAS CANCER
21. Ralph Reed DRUNK FRAT-BOY HYPOCRITE, SOUND FAMILIAR?
22. Phyllis Schafly RABID NUTCASE
23. Sen. Jim Inhofe OUTRAGED BY THE OUTRAGE
24. Rep. Marilyn Musgrave GAYS ARE TERRORISTS
25. Condoleezza Rice YES SIR, IT SURE SOUNDS LIKE A TERRIBLE PILOT
2. George “Dubya” Bush CHIMP
3. Richard “Dick” Cheney PUPPY KILLER
4. Tom DeLay BUG KILLER
5. John Ashcroft CROONER
6. Denny Hastert PIG WRESTLER
7. Douglas Feith TRAITOR
8. Ann Coulter LIBERALS ARE TERRORISTS
9. Rush Limbaugh BIG FAT IDIOT
10. Bill O’Leilly FALAFEL IN THE SHOWER
11. Rick Santorum FECAL MATTER
12. Karl Rove GOEBBELS
13. Zell Miller BENEDICT ARNOLD
14. Sean Hannity LYING SCUM
15. Jerry Falwell BLAMES AMERICA FIRST, REALLY REALLY FIRST
16. Pat Robertson AGREES WITH FALWELL
17. Richard Perle SATAN’S MINION
18. Clarence Thomas SLAP THIS IN THE VCR, OR WAS IT A BETA?
19. Katherine Harris CRUELLA DeVIL
20. Newt Gingrich I CAN’T BE WITH A WOMAN WHO HAS CANCER
21. Ralph Reed DRUNK FRAT-BOY HYPOCRITE, SOUND FAMILIAR?
22. Phyllis Schafly RABID NUTCASE
23. Sen. Jim Inhofe OUTRAGED BY THE OUTRAGE
24. Rep. Marilyn Musgrave GAYS ARE TERRORISTS
25. Condoleezza Rice YES SIR, IT SURE SOUNDS LIKE A TERRIBLE PILOT
26. Fred Barnes OOPS, I LIED AGAIN
27. William “Bill” Bennett MORALS CZAR WITH A GAMBLING PROBLEM
28. Rupert Murdoch WHAT’S WORSE? MY NEWS CHANNEL, OR MY FALL LINEUP?
29. Donald Rumsfeld DEAD ENDER
30. William Rehnquist I PROMISE NOT TO SELL MY HOUSES TO JEWS
31. Alan Keyes IS MAKING SENSE?
32. Ollie North I FEEL SO BAD ABOUT LYING TO CONGRESS, I THINK I’LL RUN FOR A SENATE SEAT
33. Lynn Cheney AUTHOR OF SOFT LESBIAN PORN
34. Scooter Libby TRAITOR
35. Paul Wolfowitz THIS WAR WILL COST 1 OR 2 BILLION, TOPS
36. Jeb Bush JEB TO BLACKS, DROP DEAD
37. William Safire KERRY SOLD ANTHRAX TO OSAMA
38. Antonin Scalia CLIMBING STAIRS IS GOOD EXERCISE FOR THE HANDICAPPED
39. William “Bill” Kristol I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO TEL AVIV…
40. Rev. James Dobson JUST READ HIS COLUMNS
41. Trent Lott RACIST CHEERLEADER
42. Sen. Jon Kyl DIMMEST BULB IN THE SENATE
43. Kate O’Bierne TALKING HEAD TOOL
44. Pat Buchanan HOLOCAUST? WHAT’S THE BIG DEAL?
45. Porter Goss HIT MAN
46. Rep. Henry Hyde MY ADULTERY GOOD, YOUR ADULTERY BAD
47. Bob Dole IT WAS JUST 3 SCRATCHES
48. Neil Kavuto ENORMOUS HEAD
49. Rep. Heather Wilson NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN MY NIPPLES
50. Michelle Malken DEFENDER OF INTERNMENT CAMPS
27. William “Bill” Bennett MORALS CZAR WITH A GAMBLING PROBLEM
28. Rupert Murdoch WHAT’S WORSE? MY NEWS CHANNEL, OR MY FALL LINEUP?
29. Donald Rumsfeld DEAD ENDER
30. William Rehnquist I PROMISE NOT TO SELL MY HOUSES TO JEWS
31. Alan Keyes IS MAKING SENSE?
32. Ollie North I FEEL SO BAD ABOUT LYING TO CONGRESS, I THINK I’LL RUN FOR A SENATE SEAT
33. Lynn Cheney AUTHOR OF SOFT LESBIAN PORN
34. Scooter Libby TRAITOR
35. Paul Wolfowitz THIS WAR WILL COST 1 OR 2 BILLION, TOPS
36. Jeb Bush JEB TO BLACKS, DROP DEAD
37. William Safire KERRY SOLD ANTHRAX TO OSAMA
38. Antonin Scalia CLIMBING STAIRS IS GOOD EXERCISE FOR THE HANDICAPPED
39. William “Bill” Kristol I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO TEL AVIV…
40. Rev. James Dobson JUST READ HIS COLUMNS
41. Trent Lott RACIST CHEERLEADER
42. Sen. Jon Kyl DIMMEST BULB IN THE SENATE
43. Kate O’Bierne TALKING HEAD TOOL
44. Pat Buchanan HOLOCAUST? WHAT’S THE BIG DEAL?
45. Porter Goss HIT MAN
46. Rep. Henry Hyde MY ADULTERY GOOD, YOUR ADULTERY BAD
47. Bob Dole IT WAS JUST 3 SCRATCHES
48. Neil Kavuto ENORMOUS HEAD
49. Rep. Heather Wilson NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN MY NIPPLES
50. Michelle Malken DEFENDER OF INTERNMENT CAMPS
Try the links, they prove my point.
