Carnacki’s Chiller Theater

I give a warm holiday greetings to any practicing witches reading this.

We are on the eve of Walpurgis Night. Enjoy, but don’t party too hard. The rest of you, I hope you have lain your bonfires for lighting.

Tonight’s edition of Carnacki’s Chiller Theater is taped in advance before a dead studio audience because as you read this, I am trapped in a minivan with three children under the age of 7. The horror! The horror!

So turn down your lights. Turn up your spookiest music. And prepare to enter the only diary on the BooMan Tribune that is a blatant ripoff, I mean homage, of Cheers & Jeers.

Thrills to Iranian Jones. Iranian archaeologists are trying to solve a mystery: Why was a temple hidden under rocks and broken bricks? My guess is an ancient curse was involved. You gotta be careful with those temple curses. That’s how Karl Rove was unleashed upon the world.

Thrills to library discoveries . I get excited when I find an Agatha Christie or Louis Lamour I haven’t read. A Welsh librarian discovered The Genealogy of Jesus Christ, a centuries old tome whose discovery is like a plot twist in The Da Vinci Code.

Thrills to papyrus yields ancient secrets to new technology. Amazingly new information revealed although, one of the secrets unlocked was already covered by Alan Moore in a Marvel comic book. I always thought Stan Lee was on the side of the angels.

Chills to taking away popular myths. Experts say nothing to the full moon creating havoc. Police dispatchers and hospital nurses say differently.

Chills to Lake Erie’s dead zone. Large section of Lake Erie is a dead zone. Fertilizers, pollution, and mussels suspected (I bet mussels take the fall for it.)

Chills to the Amityville Horror. Or as I dubbed it, the Amityville Snorer.

Thrills to hauntingly beautiful photographs.

Thrills to mysterious tunnels.

And saving the best for last, Thrills to 42 and her dear daughter’s accounts and photographs of Recollections Ossuary at Sedlec, Czech Republic: Church of All Saints.

So what is Thrilling and Chilling you?