I am very conflicted about writing this diary, but I feel that I must in light of the Memorial Day holiday.
The Gold Star Mothers are a group of mothers who have lost a son or daughter in service to the United States. They have been in existence since 1928 as a result of losses endured during World War I.
The success of our organization continues because of the bond of mutual love, sympathy, and support of the many loyal, capable, and patriotic mothers who while sharing their grief and their pride, have channeled their time, efforts and gifts to lessening the pain of others.
We stand tall and proud by honoring our children, assisting our veterans, supporting our nation, and healing with each other.
These women, who have endured one of the hardest sacrifices for our country, came together to help one another cope; yet they have denied the application of Ligaya Lagman.
Follow me below the fold for a sad story…
Army Staff Sgt. Anthony Lagman was killed in action in Afghanistan in 2004. His mother, Ligaya Lagman, submitted an application to join the Gold Star Mothers at the behest of veterans and legislators in her hometown of Yonkers, New York.
The problem arises because Mrs. Lagman is not a United States citizen. According to the Gold Star Mothers rules, only U.S. citizens are eligible for membership. Mrs. Lagman has Permanent Resident status but that was not enough for the Gold Star Mothers to accept her application.
CNN has picked up on the story:
Lagman has lived in the United States for more than 20 years. She was not at home Thursday, apparently tending to her husband, who is hospitalized. But her other son, Chris Lagman, said in Thursday’s The Journal News that all she wants “is recognition as the mother of this fallen soldier.”
Lagman’s application was initiated by Ben Spadaro, a veteran from Yonkers, who said he learned about the citizenship rules of the American Gold Star Mothers while working on a national cemetery committee of the Veterans Administration. When he learned of Anthony Lagman’s death and saw Lagman was a citizen but his mother was not, he thought, “He’s buried in a military cemetery, with full honors. She should be able to join.”
“We decided to tell the absolute truth on the application,” he said. “We put down, `I am not an American citizen.’ It was a ploy to get them to reject her, and then we said they should change the rules.”
But the organization’s 12-member executive board voted against any change.
“We can’t go changing the rules every time we turn around,” said Herd, the national president. “When we have problems within our organization with people not abiding by the rules, we just get it straightened out, we don’t change the rules.”
CNN.com
The purpose of this diary is not to get angry with the Gold Star Mothers Board of Directors (although it’s hard not to get outraged). The reason I wrote this is because I feel Ligaya Lagman deserves to be recognized for the loss she endured. I hope you will join me in writing to the group’s President and respectfully ask that they reconsider their rules. The group is already feeling pressure from veterans and legislators, including Senator Hillary Clinton.
Maybe, just maybe, we can help to give Mrs. Lagman the honor she deserves.
The American Gold Star Mothers, Inc.
2128 Leroy Place NW – Washington, DC 20008
Phone: 202-265-0991
Fax: 202-265-6963
E-mail us at goldstarmoms@yahoo.com
This story made me so sad. I hope they will reconsider.
What a story, ME. Thanks so much for telling us. We’ll write e-mails for sure.
Am sending off an email right now. You’re right it is sad and incredibly stupid and unsympathetic…the old saying is true-rules were made to be broken especially ones that don’t make any sense.
It’s hard to believe they voted against changing the rules. Especially since two former Presidents of their group and several legislators have asked them to reconsider. This woman is here in the U.S. legally and pays taxes–she went through the immigration system correctly. It doesn’t make any sense.
that’s something I mentioned in my email…which was of course respectful but trying to get across point of another mother whose son had died who was an American citizen so why was she being denied a support group, empathy and recognition of her child dying.
I also mentioned that rules are made to be changed when they become ineffective or simply wrong and the very Constitution the military is supposed to honor has itself been amended many times so why not their group’s rules be amended. If it’s good enough for the Constitution……….
If the organization has already made it clear that they are opposed to her becoming a member, even if they agreed to change their rules because of pressure from politicians and the public as a result of media coverage, I wonder if Ms Lagman may have some misgivings about just how comforting these ladies might be to her.
It might be better to form a different, more inclusive organization more in line with US policies regarding the nationalities of their gunmen.
http://www.goldstarsiblings.com/goldstarmothers.html
This response from my email is autogenerated and is also fairly long…anytime you have involved explanations I tend to sense bullshit….but judge for yourselves.