Caught in the spotlight of history, set on the stage of a very public event, Marie Fatayi-Williams, the mother of Anthony Fatayi-Williams, 26 and missing since Thursday, appeals for news of her son. Her words are a mixture of stirring rhetoric, heartfelt appeal and a stateswoman-like vision, and so speak on many levels to the nation and the world. Her appeal is a simple one – where is my son? If he has been killed, then why? Who has gained?
This is a speech given by Marie Fatayi-Williams near Tavistock Square, in Britain, 5 days after the bombings. Her son is almost certainly dead – I wish I could change that part of the story, but I cant.
In her words I hear the voices of all mothers, all parents whose children, sons and daughters, have been lost… some for just being in the way. In the way of a bomb on the next seat, or one coming from 30,000 miles up above. In the way of a stray bullet from a gang altercation or of someone who felt that they were not too impaired to drive a vehicle or in the way of a political ideology.
And, in the midst of her tragedy, and that of others, I hear hope.
Here is her speech:
“This is Anthony, Anthony Fatayi -Williams, 26 years old, he’s missing and we fear that he was in the bus explosion … on Thursday. We don’t know. We do know from the witnesses that he left the Northern line in Euston. We know he made a call to his office at Amec at 9.41 from the NW1 area to say he could not make [it] by the tube but he would find alternative means to work.
Since then he has not made any contact with any single person. Now New York, now Madrid, now London. There has been widespread slaughter of innocent people. There have been streams of tears, innocent tears. There have been rivers of blood, innocent blood. Death in the morning, people going to find their livelihood, death in the noontime on the highways and streets.
They are not warriors. Which cause has been served? Certainly not the cause of God, not the cause of Allah because God Almighty only gives life and is full of mercy. Anyone who has been misled, or is being misled to believe that by killing innocent people he or she is serving God should think again because it’s not true.Terrorism is not the way, terrorism is not the way. It doesn’t beget peace. We can’t deliver peace by terrorism, never can we deliver peace by killing people. Throughout history, those people who have changed the world have done so without violence, they have [won] people to their cause through peaceful protest. Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King, Mahatma Gandhi, their discipline, their self-sacrifice, their conviction made people turn towards them, to follow them. What inspiration can senseless slaughter provide? Death and destruction of young people in their prime as well as old and helpless can never be the foundations for building society.
My son Anthony is my first son, my only son, the head of my family. In African society, we hold on to sons. He has dreams and hopes and I, his mother, must fight to protect them. This is now the fifth day, five days on, and we are waiting to know what happened to him and I, his mother, I need to know what happened to Anthony. His young sisters need to know what happened, his uncles and aunties need to know what happened to Anthony, his father needs to know what happened to Anthony. Millions of my friends back home in Nigeria need to know what happened to Anthony. His friends surrounding me here, who have put this together, need to know what has happened to Anthony. I need to know, I want to protect him. I’m his mother, I will fight till I die to protect him. To protect his values and to protect his memory.
Innocent blood will always cry to God Almighty for reparation. How much blood must be spilled? How many tears shall we cry? How many mothers’ hearts must be maimed? My heart is maimed. I pray I will see my son, Anthony. Why? I need to know, Anthony needs to know, Anthony needs to know, so do many others unaccounted for innocent victims, they need to know.
It’s time to stop and think. We cannot live in fear because we are surrounded by hatred. Look around us today. Anthony is a Nigerian, born in London, worked in London, he is a world citizen. Here today we have Christians, Muslims, Jews, Sikhs, Hindus, all of us united in love for Anthony. Hatred begets only hatred. It is time to stop this vicious cycle of killing. We must all stand together, for our common humanity. I need to know what happened to my Anthony. He’s the love of my life. My first son, my first son, 26. He tells me one day, “Mummy, I don’t want to die, I don’t want to die. I want to live, I want to take care of you, I will do great things for you, I will look after you, you will see what I will achieve for you. I will make you happy.’ And he was making me happy. I am proud of him, I am still very proud of him but I need to now where he is, I need to know what happened to him. I grieve, I am sad, I am distraught, I am destroyed.
He didn’t do anything to anybody, he loved everybody so much. If what I hear is true, even when he came out of the underground he was directing people to take buses, to be sure that they were OK. Then he called his office at the same time to tell them he was running late. He was a multi-purpose person, trying to save people, trying to call his office, trying to meet his appointments. What did he then do to deserve this. Where is he, someone tell me, where is he?”
[Also posted in Human Beams – Our Society]
I would love to stand together with these mothers, Marie Fatayi-Williams, Cindy Sheehan, Iraqi mothers, Afghani mothers, African mothers, Columbian mothers, mothers like me whose hearts are breaking, and say these same things to the world.
What are we doing? How much longer will we be asked to endure?
Does anyone knwo of such an international coalition of mothers?
I don’t know of an international coalition of mothers, no. I know there is a Mother’s Against the War one here in the US (I think that is the name).
If there isn’t an international coalition, maybe we should start one. Mothers and Fathers, Grandparents and whoever. Doesn’t matter where you are, or the what good or bad “cause” one’s child either has died for or will be asked to die for… the feelings are the same when they are lost.
Actually, I am thankfully speaking out of my ignorance of the total feeling but I think the point is the same.
I too, am speaking (thankfully) from ignorance, but I really would like to see people come together. Grief is universal in its devastations — I am just floored by the power of seeing the words of grief express the same thoughts toward humanity’s violent path. I think it would be a wonderful project to bring them all together in one place….
If I come across anything like that, I’ll let you know. I think something along those lines is probably one of our only hopes.
In different countries, cities, communities, when enough people get tired of the violence, and wars and random killings, they band together and do something about it. Neighborhood Watch groups, coalitions against violence, and so on.
With the connectivity of the internet, how much more powerful something like that could be if it was international… people everywhere just stopping and saying, “No More”.
It’s a very, very long shot, of course, but don’t many realities begin with a dream?
I’ll keep an eye out too, Nanette!
We spend 9 months sharing our body. I spoke to mine before they were even born. Then those gentle months when they are so helpless and need us so much. How can a woman ever deal with the killing of one of her children? I don’t know.
This is what I think about too — how? The loss of a child for a parent is too horrible to contemplate in its entirety, yet we must, because so many of our sisters and brothers are experiencing this loss regularly and in the most horrible way imaginable.
The pain of losing a child – no matter their age – is excruciating.
It might be worse as a biological mother but as a step-mother I can tell you the loss of a child to a drunk driver devastated me and his father. He was 30. I’d known him for 14 years.
To be a mother and lose her child in war or terrorist attack would be horrific. I see the pictures in RubDMC’s diary everyday and want to scream. I want to take home and care for the mothers, like the one in F/911, like this one….
When a child dies – you simply rage against the cause…then become determined to stop it before another child dies.
I’m sorry for your loss. I don’t think it’s any different for a biological mother than for a step mother or adopted parent. Our children are our children, regardless.
What I was thinking, when I first read this, was how I used to go into my daughter’s room, when she was sleeping, just to watch her breathe. I’d stand there, very quiet and still, as if by moving at all, I’d be unable to see… and just wait for her little chest to rise and then fall again.
All the little things parents do, all the hopes and dreams and desires… quite often things don’t turn out how we want them to. But still, we hope and plan. But not for something like this, whether we are in Afghanistan, or Manhattan.