Fit To Print Me – Day 2

The lack of blog news has had no apparent effect, yet.  But, I suppose the blissfully ignorant don’t really have much of a suspicion on what they are missing.  Finished the NYTs (or at least those parts I felt like reading) by 8:30 a.m.  It is going to be a long, newsless day.

What does one do in the absence of current, real news, you might ask?  Well, I have already had my morning toast, so I have the bread part out of the way.  And there is a minor league day game with the family and a visiting mascot that reminds me of the San Diego chicken.  So that probably suffices for the circuses part of the equation.

But really, having all the non-Internet time is not all bad.  Had time for a very productive work day yesterday, and still was able to read a good bit of Naomi Klein’s “No Logo.”  More on that and how it relates to the NYTs at the end.
The Times.  My old friend.  Page one for two days running is that old familiar story – Boy meets Classified Information, Boy loves idea of using Classified Information against political enemies, Boy leaks Classified Information.  Today’s installment – The President Backtracks.  I am sure you all blogged the hell out of this yesterday.  Bush modifies stance so that he will only fire Rove is Rove “committed a crime.”  Okay chimpy.

Page five. Scorching Heat in Europe.  Temperatures have soared to unusual levels.  “Furnace-like weather” is the worst since the ’40s.  No mention of global warming or climate change though.  Huh?  Bet someone writing on dKos or BMT would have drawn the connection.  But, the Times – they like to make you work for your own connections.

The War in Iraq was moved to page 11, and 16 respectively, and only mentioned tangentially.  Silly little war.  Page 11 – From Britain – Events in Iraq act as motivation for terror against the UK.  Government dismisses the report.  And page 16 – the feel good story of the war – Iraqi boy has flown to US in attempt to have his blinded eye repaired by our wonderful health care system.  Bad news though.  His eye is beyond repair, and his good eye has damage that may lead to blindness without medical attention.  And his eye – got they way because of an American cluster bomb.  The little terrorist in training.  Any red-blooded American would be glad he is blinded (for those of you who don’t know me, this said with dark sarcasm – I don’t hate Iraqis – I think we should stop bombing them altogether).

What bumped Iraq off the front page.  Page one – Are You Tired of Prying Stickers Off Your Fruit.  If this wasn’t so gawd-awful, I would laugh.  Page one of the NYTs.  The horror of having sticky tags on your fruit, and the industry cure you have been waiting for.  The story just stinks.  Includes the heart-wrenching tale of an old woman from Texas who had to spend a half-hour (that’s right – a whole half-hour) taking sticky labels off her fruit.  And then, some of the fruit was injured, so she had to use that fruit for fruit salad.  Gasp.  And worse, one morning she got up and actually had sticky tags in her hair.  The menace.  The industry has responded to this mammoth inconvenience.  They have invented laser and dye labeling for our fruit and vegetables.  Your fruit will be tattooed in the near future, and the little-old ladies of the world will be safer.  And get this, the process has been “government approved and called safe by the industry.”  Phew.  I feel better already.  No problems with this scheme.  Laser label all my food.  Hell, while you are at it, laser label me.  Laser labeling will help track the food from its cradle in the field to its grave in your stomach.  And they might even be able to sell advertising space on the non-labeled portion of the fruit and vegetables.  Yee-haw.

Bringing me at long last to Naomi Klein and “No Logo.”  I was reading last night about the ascendency of branding by corporations.  And the extremes it is being taken to.  Brand products are just a start.  Branded stores.  Branded vacations.  Branded take-overs and synergy (f.k.a. anti-trust violations).  And its ultimate extreme.  Branded lives.  Living in Disney-town USA – Celebration, Florida.  Klein made the most excellent point that had never quite dawned on me.  The thing Disney is capturing in Celebration, Florida is the very thing that Branding and Disney have worked to destroy throughout America.  That simple ’50-esque village, with much (pseudo) public space and very little exposure to billboards, big-box stores and brand marketing.  Good read if you are interested.  I can’t wait to get to the chapters on how to fight back – because I am blown away by the power of these corporations.

Anyway, the NYTs article on branding our fruit and vegetables makes only scant mention to what I perceive to be the real reason for the movement to laser-label our food.  I would bet you dollars to doughnuts that it is either cheaper for the producers to label in this way, or it provides them sufficient branding value to more than offset any price difference.  Or, have I just grown paranoid?  I don’t know.  But, riddle me this?  How does this story rise to page one of the NYTs, if it is not part of some industry pushed design to stuff this down our throats.  Seriously, was someone at the editorial board sitting around weighing this story against say other stories on War or High Crimes and Misdemeanors.  What a fucking joke.  All right.  That said.  I have another slice of toast, and a minor league game complete with a comic chicken, to attend to.