Crossposted at dKos and My Left Wing
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
I mean, I have always felt so repressed. It’s a horrible thing living a lie, convinced that my friends and family members would hate me if they knew the truth. It’s just been so unbearable and overwhelming. I always felt guilty checking out cute democrats at school, even if I couldn’t help it. I wanted to ask them out canvassing or to a local Meetup, but I was just so scared…
Now I’ve had liberal tendencies for as long as I can remember… I’m convinced that I was born this way. I’ve always loved Barbara Streisand’s Christmas CD and would get that “tingly feeling” whenever a protest march passed our house, I’ve just always kept my feelings inside and the turmoil has been tearing me apart.
I remember when I first thought I might be liberal and wanted to find a way to confirm or deny my feelings. I smuggled a DNC voter’s guide into my room in the middle of the night, thinking no one would ever find out. I got caught, and I remember my parents being shocked and confused. My mother was in tears and my dad kept screaming, “are you a troop-hating, tree-hugger?” “Are you one of those pro-choice, French-loving, latte drinkers!?” This made me so upset and I just starting denying it all, because what else could I say? My parent’s words are often so cruel, but I just couldn’t think of how bad it might get if they found out their own son was a liberal.
Besides that one night, I’m not sure if anyone ever really suspected… I mean, I am a bit of a bohemian and do have slightly progressive mannerisms. I’ve never been one to try to convince people that I’m conservative by saying how much I hate “evildoers” or by shouting, “Yes! I LOVE George W. Bush!” I just don’t say much on the subject at all. I guess people either think that I’m an independent or just “a sensitive guy who likes Six Feet Under.”
I just wish everyone could be ok with the fact that some people’s ideas and beliefs are not the same as theirs, and they shouldn’t hate people because of that.
But today I came out… and I was surprised to learn that there are so many others out there like me. It has been such a rewarding and liberating experience that I regret all the years I have wasted being afraid. I will never go back.
And for anybody else in the closet reading this, this is for you… I just want you to know that there is hope. Just wait for the right moment, you’ll know in your gut. And don’t be afraid of the Coulters, Hannitys or Limbaughs… as long as you can accept who you are you can live a happy and fulfilling life.
Be proud, be yourself… be a Liberal.
Note: Since there was some slight confusion when I posted this at Kos, I just wanted all to know that this diary is a parody. Of course there is an element of truth behind my words, (my family ARE all conservative Republicans). I just thought using a little humor might lighten things up and get the point across more effectively.
Tips/Flips?
Yeah I think we are finally starting to see the word lose some of the pagorative connotation its gotten over the past 20 years. Glad to hear it.
Welcome to the vast left wing conspiracy! Now that you’ve outed yourself, you must feel like a great burden has been lifted. BTW, do you know about the secret handshake?
No. But I heard we cruise bookstore restrooms to trade voter registration lists.
Don’t let him fool you.
There IS no secret handshake… the stealth wingnutters just KNEW we had to have one, so we let them make something up. You know wings… never happy doing politics unless they get to make shit up about libruls.
But it’s not without advantages — since there IS no secret handshake, it makes it easier for the real liberals to tell who the ap’s and ringers and cointelpro types are. If someone comes up to you offering his (it’s always a “his”) hand in some strange esoteric position, you’ll know it’s a wingnut. Just go ahead and shoot `im. You’re going to have to sooner or later, best get it out of the way. Saves time.