I just realized the morning is all gone, and I am STILL sitting here reading blogs. Argh. This is because I allowed myself to (once again!) get hooked into the latest “blog battles”, and like a drooling addict, I could not stop imbibing till I got to the absolute bitter end of the comments. (and I wasn’t even participating in this one.)
I am a recovering alcholic and this is VERY familiar, very old and stinky behavior, this near total preoocupation with something to the total exclusion all other plans I had for this beauiful bright fall morning. This has got to stop. Who does it serve? Not me,and certainly not the family I could have shared some of this morning with.
I know I could have just sat myself down and given myself this lecture privately, but I also know I’m not the ony one with this malady, and misery loves company.
Here’s what ticks me off when I embrace addictive behavior like this: I HATE the loss of control over how I spend my own time and energies.
“I” want to decide what my hours are going to hold: not some addictive urge-surge that just steps in and takes my hours away from me, dammit!
So I am raising my own “Addict Alert” to orange for the time being, and implementing emergency measures. Out comes the hated timer with the horrible, ear splitting buzz that makes my hair hurt. One hour a day, and that’s it, till I regain voluntary control again.
With any luck, this could actually mean getting my laundry done before I run out of my last pair of “holey” underwear (hidden under the pile of good ones.) Then I could get outside and walk in the leaves some more, before I come back here to hopefully write something decent for a change.
Whew. Good. I’m back in control now.
How about you?
As a recovering person myself I am right behind you Scribe. I went through this before I went on vacation a couple of weeks ago. I actually paid someone to clean my apartment. I mean one day it was clean and before I knew it a total disaster. I too am taking longer breaks. I think we all need to come up for air from time to time. Let’s face it there can be alot of negativity(justly so most times with all that has gone on with the cabal governmentality)and I tend to be a sponge and pick up on vibes very easily.
I got tired of being angry all the time. So did my friends and family. So ten minutes here and ten minutes there and that is what my pea brain can take these days. I like the timer idea.
thank you for sharing and helping us all look at ourselves more closely.
(Of course, you’ll notice,I’m sure, that by putting up a diary, I have given my inner addict an excuse for for staying online longer, right? Sheesh. Can we say..cunning, baffling and powerful…??)
Will be back a bit later. (after at least a walk in the park!)
A TIMER?!?!
but if I stop, I might MISS something (hands shakily sliding mouse …)!
Easy, Madman..easy…take a deep breath, stroke your keyboard lovingly, whatever it takes not to panic. No need for the cold turky shivers..
that’s good …
I hate when I start seeing dancing pink startup screens …
then it is, and you should acknowledge that and get control of it. I am certainly guilty of compulsive blog watching. Good for you to come up for air.
I only want to point out that blogging is one of the few addictions that exercises your mind. It can raise your blood pressure and affect your sleep patterns, but otherwise its side effects include increased knowledge, improved language skills, and possible friendships. We could do worse.
Oh wait wait wait.. I don’t mean it’s all BAD! My entire life has been enriched by all i’ve learned online. It’s just my own inability to remain in charge of how much time/energy I spend online, that is the addictive part I’m referring to here. As a card carrying addictive type personaily..I live with an inner voice that says if “some” of something is a good thing, then “gobs” of somethiing will be great. Not so, when it tosses one off balance too badly!
moderation is the key and that works for me.
Don’t I have work to do? 🙂
I plead guilty as charged. But I seldom sit down for more than 10 minutes at a time at the computer…first of all it’s upstairs in the office so I’m constantly running up and down the stairs from the office to the laundry room, back to the office, back down to clean the kitchen, etc. I probably go up and down the stairs about 50 times a day, so I tell myself it’s a good thing.
And I never forego some other activity to sit here and blog. It’s probably time I would have spent watching tv or eating, so it’s quite possibly a positive thing. Right? Right?
can’t sit still for longer than 10-15 minutes-my body locks up LOL!
But this diary just helped me understand something with my 1 yr sober alcoholic. I thought it was just lazy couch potato in front of the tv but when he is sitting and sitting in front of the tv, his mouth is agape nd he is just staring – it drives me nuts, because it is now his drug of choice.
Anyways there is a commercial I saw on his tv (while I was trying to get his attention-) about some guy who is at work and fondly looks at a photo on his desk (which the audience can’t see) – at the end of the day he comes home, slowly takes his tie off (suggesting love or something)- and says hi- did you miss me? to his television.
Somehow I think it has to do with shutting the world out-like alcohol and drugs- so he doesn’t have to deal with communicating about stuff he doesn’t want to talk about..that and the mind numbing from too much tv period..
I think the computer is healthier, but can be addictive.
I read somewhere that you actually burn up more calories while you’re sleeping than when you’re watching tv. It’s such a passive activity…and it keeps you from being there with your family. You can all be sitting there in the same room and if that idiot bos is on no one is talking to each other. It just sucks the life and energy right out of you.
It’s a vacuum tube, and when you give it a direct link, it sucks your brain right out through your eyeballs.
Scary thing.
I broke mine back sometime during the Reagan years (got pissed at something Ollie North lied and threw a driller’s hammer right through the screen, which was probably not the safest reaction but seemed the thing to do at the time)and realized after a couple of days that it wasn’t worth replacing it.
And the new computer has a DVD drive so I can see the rare movie…
At least the net goes both ways and DEMANDS interaction…
the spouse and I usually talk MORE when the TV is on; that’s when I come up with some of my best bon mots, which he totally enjoys. Thank goodness for me DVRing the early showing of “Countdown”, so I can pause for one of us to make commentary or back up when we miss a good line…
We’ve started talking more in bed before falling asleep as well, along with laughing together; I think that’s improving our relationship exponentially. Now if I could just get him to get to bed before midnight on a regular basis…
I can’t get my husband to come to bed at a reasonable time because of sports! I keep telling him that that is why we are not progressing. But he’s having prostate problems and I think he thinks thats why I want him to come to bed…as if…
I can give it up Anytime I Want.
(But first I have to read the latest on the Fitzgerald investigation.)
I’ve had to walk away and ration my daily exposure. I’ve got an exam tomorrow and I’m not sure whether the butterflies I’m feeling in my stomach are related to getting a passing grade or excitement about indictment announcements. I am so totally happy about missing the latest “blog battle.” Like you, I have a auto accident fascination with watching people slag each other so I’m doubly glad I didn’t waste my time and energy on it.
Good move..and good luck on the exam, too.
🙂
Oh Scribe. . .I think you nailed a lot of us. . .
For those of you who need some help, like I do. There are free downloads of an egg timer for your desktop screen. It is fabulous, set it for how long you wish and it lets you know it is time to go do something else.
Great little thing it is. I don’t have the URL, but just google free egg timer downloads, there are several of them.
I have always been adicted to reading, so no surpsrise reading all the interesting things on blogs that I got sucked right into it. The egg timer really, really does help. I can even wait two or three hours to get on line after I get up in the morning, something that used to come right before the coffee was brewing.
Thanks sister. Nice to know we are not alone, eh?
My solution:
I started my own blog and gave myself a perfectly legitimate EXCUSE to stay glued.
Of course, that only works if the damned site has the potential to change the world… or at the very least, make some DOUGH.
So far, thankfully, I think the former is happening.
Pity about the latter, though.
I’ve checked out your blog, Maryscott. I like it a lot.
Those who change the world seldom hold the purse strings.
I just took a mini-break myself of a couple days. When I find myself bawling over blog stories (especially ones like this), I know it’s time to step away for awhile. I tend to reach my tolerance limits for all this ‘stuff’ quicker these days, and can feel how unhealthy it is … it affects my off-line life, and that is not good, nor fair to my family.
Yep, it gets to me too: some days it feels like total overload: just too much bad news all coming down at once. I need regular breaks form all electronic input too, and to get outside amidst some natural beauty awhile.
So glad I’m not the only one in need of a 12-step program for bloggers. I am new to this world (of blogs) but have been “on the juice” since January, when I had some orthopedic surgery. My husband’s fatal mistake was bringing up the laptop so I could IM him when I needed stuff. I didn’t fret when my post-op Percocet prescription was depleted, but this – I just hafta have it. I’m now an official blog-ho.
I have a natural timer in that I share the house computer with my teenage son, who is always impatient to get on and get to his addiction, namely chatting to his friends on MSN.
But when he’s out … I find myself forsaking the dishes, staying up too late … I’ll just read one more … I’ll just refresh one more time … wait, there’s two new comments on that great diary, I’ll just read them and then …
Many bleary-eyed mornings after not enough sleep ensue.
Since I’ve been addicted this way all my life to reading, I don’t hold out much hope for getting over this one.
Hey, at least it’s not illegal. Or fattening.