I just realized the morning is all gone, and I am STILL sitting here reading blogs. Argh. This is because I allowed myself to (once again!) get hooked into the latest “blog battles”, and like a drooling addict, I could not stop imbibing till I got to the absolute bitter end of the comments. (and I wasn’t even participating in this one.)
I am a recovering alcholic and this is VERY familiar, very old and stinky behavior, this near total preoocupation with something to the total exclusion all other plans I had for this beauiful bright fall morning. This has got to stop. Who does it serve? Not me,and certainly not the family I could have shared some of this morning with.
I know I could have just sat myself down and given myself this lecture privately, but I also know I’m not the ony one with this malady, and misery loves company.
Here’s what ticks me off when I embrace addictive behavior like this: I HATE the loss of control over how I spend my own time and energies.
“I” want to decide what my hours are going to hold: not some addictive urge-surge that just steps in and takes my hours away from me, dammit!
So I am raising my own “Addict Alert” to orange for the time being, and implementing emergency measures. Out comes the hated timer with the horrible, ear splitting buzz that makes my hair hurt. One hour a day, and that’s it, till I regain voluntary control again.
With any luck, this could actually mean getting my laundry done before I run out of my last pair of “holey” underwear (hidden under the pile of good ones.) Then I could get outside and walk in the leaves some more, before I come back here to hopefully write something decent for a change.
Whew. Good. I’m back in control now.
How about you?
