Froggy Bottom Cafe – Monday Moaning
Real live host on duty today!
Newcomers welcome, please introduce yourselves.
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Newspapers are in their regular spot next to the door
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Please recommend
(and unrecommend the Cafe/Lounge from earlier) |
May the 4’s be with you
Hello, hello everyone! Anyone home?
Hello
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone home?
Well there she is! We were planning your memorial service.
Wow, there’s a party with a ton of booze, a large smoke cloud, and an awful lotta bad 70s synth pop & 80s hair metal.
Speaking of which, let me wish a very sweet sixteenth Happy Birthday to your baby boy.
Thanks, I’ll tell him you said so. Can boys really be “sweet” 16? I know I sure as hell wasn’t.
My 16th was exceptionally sweet but I dare not tell that story to anyone who’s currently parenting teenagers considering its paradoxical NC-17 rating.
This would depend on one’s definition of ‘sweet’. I can’t remember my 16th…it’s just one more event in the blur that was my childhood.
Let me just say I’m using a definition that would make my grandmother forcibly drag me into the Confessional.
So it’s “sweeeeeeeet!” as opposed to “aw, look at that baby raccoon”
what kind of smoke…
That kind.
I thought we were planning her kidnapping — I know DJ and kansas were.
See how out of the loop I am? I heard them say “let’s go bag Indy” and I thought they meant a body bag. Of course, that also has some decidely sexual undertones to it that are way more fun to think about.
Well, we figured we had to kidnap her in order to get her to her memorial service.
Indy, you have saved us so much trouble!
Doesn’t everyone have to be kidnapped to be brought to their memorial service? It’d freak folks out pretty hard if anyone ever showed up on their own…ahhh zombie!
I’m going to be laughing over this for the rest of the day. Thanks for the endorphins.
Sorry I missed last Friday’s Random 10, but didn’t get home till quite late…
Adding to the eclecticism; downloading a bunch of Celtic Woman I just bought from iTunes (and I used the BooTrib link, adding to Boo’s coffers…heck, I can justify the cost now, it’s a good cause, after all… 😉 ). Can’t wait till those pop up on a Random 10 list, Gaelic titles and all…maybe Gooserock can help with translation?
Speaking of missing folks, anyone seen Kelly (KMc) lately? Miss his morning tea reports…
I believe he has a deadline to meet and is exhibiting tremendous self-control by working instead of visiting with us here in the cafe.
Unlike some people we know. And I don’t mean you.
I love the Homer Scream.
Hell Cali, I missed last Friday’s Random 10, too, because I was on a much-needed break.
If I’m not mistaken, Kelly McC announced a while ago that he’d be sporadic in January so he could get some actual work done. Ha, those poor suckers with jobs have it rough.
I resent the implication that some of us just sit on our asses all day. Why just yesterday I walked from the living room to the kitchen to refill my Fresca.
Might be time to walk to the bathroom by now, then, huh? Or do you just use the empty Fresca container?
Sadly, my anatomy doesn’t allow me to direct my stream that efficiently. I’m the one who can’t pee in the woods without getting my shoes all wet.
Funny story about peeing in the woods:
First you must know that I am terribly pee-shy and cannot go if someone is within earshot.
I once went to a Beltane festival sort of thing in the Middle Tennessee woods with a new girlfriend. There were a few hundred people there, all camping out, staying in tents, parked vehicles, and whatnot. We were staying in my g-friend’s truck, parked along a beautiful ridge with some other people doing vehicle-camping.
One particularly quiet late morning, I awoke having to pee really badly and there was no way I was going to make it to the latrine area. So I thought to myself, Oh a little pee in the dirt by the trucks isn’t going to hurt anyone.
So there I was, balanced in between my g-friend’s truck and the van in front of us, hanging on to the bumpers so I could kinda hide from the nearby path and avoid peeing on my shoes, when all FOURTEEN people who were van-camping in that van came back to the van all at once. Unable to move from the pain induced by my muscles clamping down mid-stream, I simply squatted there while they all walked by me, grinning and waving and wishing me good morning and festive Beltane. I’m still a little traumatized by it.
The visuals, the visuals…
In top form today, Indy.
Damned, now I am totally distracted from work.
You probably deserve a day off, anyway, might as well take it while you’re there and still get paid. 😉
I think we were separated at birth. Forget about that pesky ten year difference. I have the shyest bladder on earth! I can’t go if someone else is in a public bathroom, unless it’s really noisy with toilets constantly flushing and hand dryers going. If I’m in one of those two seaters and someone else comes in, I instantly freeze.
One time I was with a boyfriend at an Eagles concert (okay, this is instantly aging me and my coolness factor has dropped off the charts) at the old Coliseum outside of Cleveland where the parking lots were cow pastures. At the end of the concert I had to pee so bad and we were walking around for what felt like hours looking for our car (I know we parked by a tree on some muddy grass)I finally squatted down between two cars parked bumper to bumper. After making sure my newish boyfriend was out of earshot I finally started to relieve myself and one of the cars started up and turned on the headlights, causing me to duck and roll, pants around ankles, under the other car. Boyfriend laughing in distance…
lol at your pee story. ::whispers:: I think the Eagles are cool as hell, and I have also seen them play live.
Love the Eagles. Will always love them. So there (whomever).
Hey, don’t feel too bad. Perhaps you haven’t yet gotten a call from the concert cops, saying, “Is this Ms. Cabin? We are holding your son. He was caught peeing in the bushes.”
Desperado!
Although why they would call you “Ms. Cabin,” I have no idea, unless it was CabinGirl I thought I was talking to. Also, since it was me they were calling.
I’m glad you explained that to me, because I was wondering why they’d be calling you if Cabin Girls boys were in trouble.
Six degrees
of CabinGirl.
I love the Eagles too. Peaceful Easy Feeling…my fave.
You callin’ me a sucker? :::sniff:::
CabinGirl, you’re a freakin’ hero. Two kids, school, job, and still big-hearted and liberal and ethical — I don’t know how you do it, but I’m constantly in awe of you.
:::blushing:::
Glad you’re back!
Would that I could exercise similar self-control; I’ve been so busy with computer maintenance that I haven’t got anything done today. Then again, the computer maintenance is important too…(yeah, I’ll justify it anyway possible…)
You’ve just made my day with your reappearance!!
The emails I’ve been writing to you are still in my head, doesn’t mean you might not still get one though…
Thanks, NDD. One really beautiful thing about email boxes is that they are always open. (And heh, another good thing about the internet is that no one knows how offkey I am when I sing old Pink Floyd songs.)
I’m so relieved you are back. I was trying to take your place in making dirty remarks out of innocent ones and the pressure was really getting to me. Plus, I lack your talents (and I’m sure we both can make something out of that).
Frankly, I doubt you lack any talents, but then again you are my role model.
The talents I lack are legion but among the ones I have is the ability to instantly forget I know I’m better off not remembering (role model? who’s a role model?)
well, ahem, while Andi’s attempt at being IndyLib was certainly appreciated… it in no way came close to… what shall we say, the flair with which the real IndyLib expresses herself!
::blush:: Thanks NDD, but I am a mere mortal. Andi, as we all know around here, occasionally morphs into the earthly representation of the Divine Blue Dot. And I would not even try to compete with that. 😉
In the realm of funny filth (at the very least), you are no mortal but one for the ages. Deal.
decades; it’s that all women are unique!
Not, of course, similarly unique… ah… but… uniquely unique!
You’ve jogged a memory today,
I’m somewhere on the Alan highway on the way back to ND from Palmer,AK after visiting a friend from ND who was homesteading, (circa ’73).
There’s a full moon, it was about 2:30AM, some radio station is playing Dark Side of the Moon… which is already spooky enough… but about then a silver fox crossed the road in front of me… only one I’ve ever seen in the wild!.
see here 2nd photo
That’s a creepy looking fox.
And now you’ve jogged a memory; I haven’t thought of Palmer since I was there in the 80s. I can’t even imagine doing the Alcan in ’73 — you’re a brave & crazy soul.
I was born and raised on gravel roads, so I knew enough to pull way over to the side and slow down when meeting any other vehicles, especially trucks.
Never lost a headlight, not a nick in the windshield until I got to Alberta, on stretch of new pavement with those little pebbles that fit so nicely in the grooves of the tires…
I hear Palmer is multiples of the size it was in the early ’70s.
It was still kind-of a one-horse town last time I was there, but even by the early 90s some of my friends were telling me I’d hardly recognize much of the southern part of the state from all the growth. It’s a mixed bag for me; on the one hand, I’m glad more people are sharing in the tremendous beauty of the place, but on the other hand, people kinda suck and too many of them tend to ruin a good thing.
Does jogging memories use up calories?
(snort!)
Does snorting use up calories?
Back to garret wade — if you buy one of tools from them, you’ll never regret it. The chisels we got from them 26 years ago are still beautiful to look at and to use.
One more bird for our feeder collection — downy woodpecker.
particularly if you understand Morse code…
I finally decoded what the one who knocks at the side of my house, while I pound on the other side of the wall,is saying, “Ha. Ha. Sucker.”
who used to peck on the downspouts, in the spring, at sunrise, rotating around the house to all four corners… I think that one was saying, “Get up! Get up!” Which was not always appreciated by the human nightowl
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Indy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
;o)
So good to see, er read you!
mmmmffffpppff
I’m sure I’d be more intelligible if I weren’t being smooshed inside your massive hug. 😉 I KID.
{{{Olivia}}}
Funny!
I did say big hugs. Didn’t want to renege. 🙂
Go read and recommend katiebird’s diary called Your health is your power so more people at BooTrib will find about her great new website Eat 4 Today.
/proud shill
Her website is great. I’m waiting until I have a really good day…i.e. not eating everything in sight just because it’s not moving, to contribute my thoughts.
Oh my, wish we were off today, like so many others. Alas.
But we were off for Eid al-Ahda last Tuesday, and get other funky ‘world’ holidays instead of MLK/Presidents/Columbus and similar US days, so who am I to complain. Maybe just play hookey for the rest of the day…
I like the Homer Scream… creative minds at work, pretty amazing!!
However, here’s the original The Scream by Norwegian painter Edvard Munch
Munch actually made four versions of The Scream, one of which was stolen from the Munch-museum in Oslo in 2004.
It is still missing.
Another version was stolen from the National Gallery in 1994, but was recovered.
Well as to the moaning part…I’ll repeat I joke I told the other night pretty much at the end of that Cafe thread.
This answers the age old question of which came first:
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on it’s face and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, “I guess we answered THAT question.”
And a Happy Sweet 16 to pass on SN..and I have absolutely no recollection of my 16th birthday at all
I’m also tearing my hair out here as my dial-up is being persnickity and slow today going from page to page…
Hey, I think I used to date that chicken!
just chiming in to say I’m glad to see you back and hope you’re doing ok.
And I suspect we’ve all had more than one run in with that type of ah fucking chicken.
lol, Chocolate Ink, you always crack me the hell up. I hope you’re feeling as well as possible these days,
straightening out arrogant doctors whenever it’s warranted.
Dating…is that what you young folk are calling it these days?
This would’ve been “back in the day” for me, since I stopped tolerating that sort of experience fairly quickly. These days that whole wing of my life exists pretty much solely in Damnit Janet’s dreamworld.
But isn’t it cool to know you exist in someone’s dreamworld? **sigh**
Do nightmares count?
I swear, it’s like you don’t hear me sometimes. I knew you for what, a week before telling you I thought you were hot? And it was all of about two weeks before I told you I thought you were sexy as hell. I guess I don’t count. ::pouts::
Oh, you count Indy. I just thought it was Be Nice to the Elderly week when you said that.
Now that I know, I am thoroughly cheered.
Indy got you to accept a compliment without qualifying it.
But she still had to throw in that Elderly Week thing, even though I’ve already told her that I prefer women who are older than me, and that half of my girlfriends have been exactly her age. I let it slide, though, because I also prefer women who can give me a good challenge. ;p
I always figured why limit yourself to your particular age group..if someone is interesting and fun why should age be a problem-and to that effect I’ve dated guys old enough to be my father and guys who were 24 years younger than me…and it’s amazing the amount of prejudice and stupidity that surrounds the whole age thing…as I found out.
24 years younger?! WHOOO HOOO!
I let it slide, though, because I also prefer women who can give me a good challenge.
Now see if I were you, I could have definitely turned that line into something beautifully obscene.
You mean it wasn’t beautifully obscene as it was? Too subtle for your tastes, I s’pose. I like to use subtlety in [what I imagine are] clever ways, though.
C’mon you two. There are weenies to be roasted.
is that what we’re supposed to let slide?
I had to read that comment about 3 times before I got the joke…either I’m getting old or I’m not getting enough… 😉
(to the spouse: if you’re lurking and reading this, take that as you will…)
I got that one, but don’t feel bad, sometimes it takes me three days… not 3 times.
Hmmm…I’m really biting my tongue trying not to say how popular you might be in some circles if it takes you three days to….
Oh well. Bad Second Nature! Husband is in Las Vegas for the week, not dead. Remember that.
as we say here in rural ND, “wouldn’t touch that one with a ten foot pole.”
And, ah, MsNDD ain’t in Las Vegas…
I am so biting me tongue now.
well I’m not biting my tongue…so I’ll just say it…a ten foot ‘whaaaaaaat’?
hey don’t feel bad, I had to read it several times before it sunk in what I was reading also…(I found it under sex quotes by the way…and no don’t even ask what I was doing looking up sex quotes people).
Anyway as to not getting jokes..I’m the oldest in the family and it was a family joke that everyone else had to explain jokes to me—-I can’t tell you how long it took me to get the one liner-‘What time does the midnight bus get in?’. Now that’s embarrassing.
I was going to say I give up and ask you what time the midnight bus got in. Then I realized it was the same as “which weighs more, a pound of lead or a pound of feathers?”
You guys are too funny today. And naughty! 😉
Little delayed reaction here…your new flower picture in the earlier cafe was wonderful..really do run out of superlatives for your flower photos…just another what was it photo slut? groupie of yours.
I think that’s a good term to use today … Fits with the theme 😉
Hmmm, groupies… That’s sorta cool!
Just had a visit from the UPS guy (and no, this has nothing to do with my most recent comment); the frog baker is evidently on backorder, but Sur La Table went ahead and sent me the mini frog:
Their website says that the frog is supposed to bring prosperity; if I ever get up the cojones to play Texas Hold ‘Em, I’ll take it with me as my card protector… 🙂
Oh my god, I’m sorry but in keeping with my down in the gutter sex thoughts….that does not look like a frog to me. Or is it just me?
Do I need a better angle? It looks like a frog while I’m looking at it now…my digital photography skills still leave a bit to be desired though — Olivia I ain’t… 😉
I’ve been away all day but when I came and saw Monday moaning I immediately thought, afternoon delight. Too many word associations, I guess. Law school will do that to you. That and, umm, too many drugs.
Hey folks, come on over to the weenie roast! (too lazy to post a link, but you can find it!)