(Washington, D.C.) – President Bush today addressed the nation and spoke bluntly about his vision for fighting terrorism, spreading democracy, and rejuvenate the economy.
However, half way through his hyped speech the President paused and turned to the Vice President seated behind him. Without any advanced warning, the President once again used his signature move to convince the American people that he was serious about fighting the war on terror and winning in Iraq by SHITTING that “the military was destroying insurgent targets and building institutions of democracy every day.”
Looking presidential, he looked in to the camera and said, “hindsight isn’t a strategy”, and “defeatism doesn’t work.” But to the surprise of viewers at home, as the President spoke, brown foam began to come out of his mouth with each of his words.
The Vice President and Speaker seated behind Bush grimaced, as the odor became visible on their faces. President Bush was once again taking a shit in the middle of the State of the Union Address. The feces flowing out of his mouth was apparent to everyone except those around him shitting with him.
The President looked so presidential he didn’t know what to do with himself. He smirked when he needed to smirk. He paused at the right times. He looked to his right and glanced to his left. Looked us into the camera and let us touch his heart. He let us feel his pain and consoled us in grief. But he still had shit flowing out of his mouth. The shit looked all to familiar.
Shit about wiretaps. Shit about illegally spying on American Citizens. Shit about the war in Iraq. Shit about fighting terrorism. Shit about capturing Bin Laden. Shit about values. Shit about democracy. Shit about everything that came out of his mouth.
Speaking bluntly, Bush shat on himself tonight.
His shit flowed from his lips in the same manner that rivers flow into the ocean. He was resolute and more determined than ever. He was confident in his shit, and more importantly believed his own shit.
“The U.S. supports democratic reform across the Middle East,” shitted Bush.
By the end of the night, experts said that President Bush once again delivered the “greatest SOTU addresses ever given.” He went beyond “the call of duty” said one pundit. “Bush was vintage Bush” said another. “He really knows his shit” said another.
As I went to sleep, I realized that I had heard all of this before. It was many speeches given in the past, put together, recycled and pieced together. By the end of the night it had the smell of feces–almost as though Bush was taking a shit out of his mouth.
This ugly diary is not even remotely funny. It can’t possibly help the cause of removing the Republicans from power. To the contrary, this kind of thing helps them by energizing their base. Delete this immediately.
Who is the 13-year-old idiot who posted this?
Don’t worry about “energizing their base.” There is only one base, one Qaeda, and they don’t come here for their energizing, they look at their quarterly statements.
The diary may be ugly, but so is the incompetent and fascist presidency of Goerge Dubya. Get a hold of Adam Sandler’s song “Piece of Shit Car” and play it in the background when you watch a tape of the State of the Union. Bush is our Piece of Shit Car.
Who cares if we energize the lunatic rightie base. Their own strategists talk about how to energize the whacko religious right, and thedisdain drips out of them when they do it. But the whacko religous right still shows up for them. They swim in the shit that comes out of Bush’s mouth.
Okay, you two are right. I retract the comment. Thanks for responding.
Bush has illegally and immorally caused over 100,000 Iraqi civilians to endure indescribable suffering as their bodies were ripped to shreds by bombs and bullets and chemical agents (the United States used phosphorus bombs in Fallujah, etc.).
With each of these tens of thousands of bodily destructions, shit and blood and brains and bone have been splattered all over countless Iraqi houses.
Yeah, the diary was appropriate. I’m genuinely sorry for my immediate negative reaction.
I hate this fucking planet. (But I’m hoping to get back to the decades of wonder for the beauty of the world.) I hate trying to talk when I’m covered by blood.
it’s true, and a viscerally visual metaphor.. People in this country need to wake up and smell the shit before it buries us all.