My Speech to the Universe
Tomorrow I go in for a CT angiogram on my failing kidneys to see if I am a candidate for vascular surgery (This is like bypass surgery on the heart.) I am as stressed as Bush probably is tonight, although for extremely different reasons.
I am concerned if my Medicare will allow the surgery; I am worried about the cost of the many new meds I am sure I will have to take (I did not sign up for Medicare D because none of the plans carried all my meds and I saw its falacy.)
I am concerned about life after death issues. I need to update my living will.
I need to find out if the surgery will hurt me more than my scleroderma (scleroderma makes surgery very iffy due to hardened organs, shrunken restrictive blood vessels etc.) than letting the kidneys fail on there own, especially since my nephrologist told me they have been inefficient/failing since 1997 (None of my other doctors mentioned this fact because at that time they were more concerned about abnormal liver tests which took a year to go back to normal due to a new medicine I was put on’s side effect.)
We are the wealthiest nation in the world, (well actually 57% of all the wealth is held by 1% of the population.) We have the best medical equipment, professionals and medicine (if one can afford them); And we have a bunch of lunatics pulling the strings on almost every aspects of our lives.
I’ve instructed my husband and daughter that if I go brain dead or get dementia etc., or in too much pain to pull the plug or arrange for meds I can take to end my life. I don’t want to be a burden and now I have to add if it gets too expensive to be on dialysis, have in-home care etc., I’ll find a way to opt out earlier.
I shouldn’t have to think this way, but I am sure there are thousands, if not millions, who are having to think this way now also, thanks to the lies, and corporate/pharmecutical theft by the compassionate conservative asshole president and his kind. There is more to life (and death) than this f**king president’s sotu stupid speech tonite.
I am not looking for sympathy. I just want to bring a dose of reality on to the table for all to see and consider. Because we all will eventually, if not already, have to deal with these issues. And if things don’t get better it could actually get worse than this.
I intend to approach tomorrow and whatever else is ahead of me with my political dukes ready. I will not go out with a whimper…I hope.
We need a universal health care system in America. I think I’ve missed that boat, but I hope most of you fight for that for yourselves and your families.

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