Barn-raising.
What does the concept evoke for you?
A bunch of Amish guys with hammers swarming over a pile of wood? Let’s look at it as a concept instead.
It’s what built this country. Cooperation. One neighbor, relative, or group helping one person or family to do more than they ever could alone. The apple harvest. The wheat harvest. Home-building. Barn-building. Wagon trains. (NOT solo wagons.) Rounding up the pigs. Slaughter and preserving animals. Cattle round-up.
It’s how people STILL live in the rural areas or small towns in this country. Helping each other. It’s a noble way of life, a life filled with meaning. With thanks, gratefulness, with that wonderful feeling that you just helped someone else have a better life. Where you’re woven into a never-ending series of favors given and received, no end in sight, the beginning far past.
A world where you don’t have to worry so much about doing “the big projects”, because you don’t have to do them on your own. Think about that, I mean really ponder it. A world where it’s natural to call on your neighbors, friends, relatives for help. Where you are more doing them a favor by asking, because you weave the community together by doing so. Where this is as much a part of life as breathing. A security infuses your everyday life. Not that hardships won’t come, but that you won’t bear them alone, but with help on every level.
Emergency at your house? No problem. As many people as needed will show up to help you. One person’s needed to watch the kids while you drive one to the hospital? Done. 14 people to help vacuum the water out of your house after it flooded? Here they come. Are some of them taking the day off work to do that, because their boss is a member of the community? Yes. Are they being paid to work at your house on the water by that boss? Possibly. Either the boss is sacrificing their pay on your account, or they’re sacrificing it by working for free for you, in any case, it’s all part of a beautiful circle, which will benefit every member in its time.
Do we have this type of community in our world today? In our country today? On this blog today? If not, why not? And if not, how can we create it? Why spend time bemoaning it if we don’t have it, let’s create it!
I would contend that creating those types of communities, both online and in person in our daily lives, is one of the most effective political acts we can commit. No, the MOST ESSENTIAL political act we can commit. Most essential.
One thing that’s so great about creating truly interwoven, giving communities? On the face of it, it’s not “political” — it’s social. It’s innocuous. But it’s powerful! It’s powerful in a way that squares or cubes the meaning of the word “powerful”. It’s the most radical,profound — and yet sweet, meaningful, and wonderful change we can make in our world.
So — that was the vision portion of this piece. Please, let’s discuss this, and not in just one diary, not just one day. Let’s not give it the add/adhd treatment. š
Now to bring this subject to the personal level, the level of this community. Last night I logged onto Booman and read that one of the premier diarists here was using a computer monitor which barely worked, and was very very small. That person lives roughly 100 miles from me. Yesterday I drove 15 miles to pay a business $10 to take an old monitor from me, and resell or recycle it. Needless to say, the irony of that is not insignificant.
Even more “synchronistic”. I’m ex-board member of a computer club in Seattle, I’m hooked in with at least 4 computer/monitor give-away programs. Add to the mix that I’ve even corresponded with that diarist personally before — she’s the person who gave me the courage to post my first diary on dKos. What’s relevant here is not that “I owe her one,” but “I kind-of personally have an email relationship with her”.
My point is — IF this diarist had asked us for help in the past, I personally could have resolved this situation long ago, and likely for no money changing hands. I sent out 3 emails about finding her a monitor, one sent at 1:02 PM. At 1:12PM, I had a reply, “Yes, there’s one sitting in the front of the user group office waiting for someone to pick it up.” In addition, I literally know a person who probably lives within 30 miles of the diarist, who runs a computer give-away program.
My point related to the above is:
If Susan had asked in the past, the need would have been supplied instantly. If I wasn’t a part of Booman, or didn’t see that post, or wasn’t connected with my computer group, it would have been easy to fill her need, another way. $10 from 30 people, and she’s got $300 for a computer monitor, easy.
So — why didn’t she ask? Why, if this is a community, as so many have said it is, didn’t she feel that it would be (back to the vision thing) doing us a favor to allow us to help her, via making her need known? After all, helping someone else a little bit, keeps the pump primed for the time when we need a little bit of help.
Thus: I propose that we radically, politically, socially change our vision of asking for help. That we see it not as weakness in some macho view of the world. Or failure in some 50’s isolationist nuclear family model of the world: “I’m not doing it all MYSELF”.
I propose we see asking as a privilege, because it means we’re a part of a community that cares. That we see it as a privilege for the others to give, because it infuses their lives with meaning, usefulness, community, belonging, and an avenue to share love.
Barn-raising. A metaphor for the kinds of community we need to create, to live in, to breathe in, to love in. What better legacy for our children and our world?
Ask, and you help to create that community.
I so look forward to hearing what you have to say.
.
will be strenghtenend by sharing experience and needs, a community is always resourceful. Heck, without a keyboard, monitor and Susan, this community would have evolved very differently.
Susan is one of many friends I would cross the ocean to help when in dire need. Great initiative LookingUp, it’s not like helping strangers but sharing with someone in your home.
Do frogs raise barns?
“But I will not let myself be reduced to silence.”
▼ ▼ ▼ MY DIARY
Do frogs raise barns. That is hilarious. Funnier the longer you think about it. Little (green) hammers.
Thanks for commenting on that – I had missed it – funny, funny image!
Kiddie Lit worth reading: Arnold Lobel’s Frog and Toad stories.
And I have more to say about this subject, but it took a while to write this, and I need to tend to other parts of my life. So forgive me if no responses quickly.
Aren’t some of the most loved diaries here about experiences of community? The fantastic Thanksgiving diary by scribe, and Ductape’s attendance at the Latin holiday celebration, as examples.
Thank you for a truly wonderful post — & for addressing a certain truth I’ve long held at the back of my mind: community is all. Community is what will allow us to survive any & all onslaughts of those in power who wish to do us harm;
community allows our lives to expand & become meaningful beyond the subjective;
our society, as it’s been constructed & maintained under the massive influences of ‘rugged individualism’, consumerism + corporatism, has driven our communities apart; therefore, relatively few of us alive today have any experience of true, vital community — the type that assures mutual well-being. To foster this type of community will take some very basic readjustments to our ways of being.
I’m fortunate enough, so to speak, to live in a rural, low-income area of the country that’s also subject to volatile inclement weather. This means that, as a solitary person without family nearby, my neighbors look out for me, are concerned for me & help me as much as they possibly can if I express a need. I daily give thanks for the individuals surrounding me in ways I never did in over 35 years as a NYC resident; I’m also careful not to ‘take advantage’ of the situation & create undue burden on their basic good will & tolerance. I do as much as I possibly can for myself, which inspires their respect.
Naturally, anonymity is traded away in a small community like mine, but how much is anonymity worth when it’s also accompanied by a free-floating suspicion — & when neighborly concern is a matter of being pressed to it by basic self-interest or fear? There’s no generosity of spirit there, which is what continues to show itself most primarily in my relations with my neighbors. We understand that ‘the system’ may not always provide for us at the most basic, day-to-day levels; a dense metropolitan environment that tends to convince us otherwise is missing.
As a priveledged member of this community I am not afraid to say that I need a hug ;o)
Thank you Lookingup. This is a wondeful diary.
Peace
((((((Supersoling))))))
((((Tampopo))))
Thank you :o)
Hugging is one thing we can’t do by ourselves.
Can’t wait to give you those hugs in person! I just have to say I have seen alot of community here. Evidenced it first hand during the Crawford protests,Brinnainne helping those arriving in Austin with a place to stay or equipment to camp, JanetStrange taking care of me when I had heat exhaustion, the DC March we had Shycat that could not go but participated by contributing hotel rooms for those that wanted to go and could not afford it, the out pouring of love and offers of help to Meteor Blades when his wife was in the accident, the tech help, the encouragement to each other to write diaries, Boo and Susan edited when I cannot for the life of me figure out html. It makes me heart soar to see that sense of community.
This is a wonderful diary and I agree that it could and should become a regular article. We need each other now more than ever and I for one feel truly blessed to know so many of you here. Can we do more? Absolutely but as the Lookingup says we need to learn to ask for help too. Love you guys!
Huggy People : )
Hey I was scratching my head because I see people helping people here all the time. And I do feel that this is a community of people who care for one another.
But still is a good reminder that we continue to be there when we’re needed.
LookingUp – this is a wonderful idea!
Funny, I was also thinking of barn-raising in thoughts on community and what it means, working on my idea of what Democrats are – not reality-based thinking, but more of what I wish they were.
And asking for help…that is so difficult, isn’t it?
Yet, in so many ways we already do ask for help – I have seen people request technical info. I received enormous help from ConneticutMan 1 and Man Egee even told me I could call him for assistance!
We ask when we don’t understand. And people so willingly explain and clarify.
Seems like what you are describing is happening – so let’s expand. š
still stands š
Oh you lovely, lovely being – last I read you were hurting – I need to give you a hug:
((((((Man Eegee))))))
although some might argue that I look better with my eyebrows singed off š
((tampopo))
on the subject of community on political blogs.
Every time I see someone bring up a techy question, there is a flurry of answers. On, ah, another blog, someone said they didn’t like their browser, IE. A jillion people told them to get Firefox, free. They did. MAN was there a wealth of good info in that thread.
They then asked, “What do I do with this?” Nother million good answers.
So my theory. Yes, we’re supposed to be about politics. BUT people say, “We’re a community.” Again, what’s more political than getting people off a holes-ridden Microsoft product that might cause their entire computer to be compromised? What’s more political than providing tech support to people for free? And I already made my case that community building is tremendously political — and makes sense on every level.
So… why not a “Thursday night Tech Questions” recurring diary? Or a “Froggy Bottom Cafe, Weds. Tech Edition” recurring diary?
I think it would help a lot of people. Even every two weeks would be great. As I said elsewhere talking about Susan’s computer, I’m not a computer expert, just not afraid to ask for help. I’m not the right person to start the thread regularly… who would be willing to do that?
the cafe still needs hosts on Wednesdays and Sundays, and I think you would make a great addition if you’re willing.
If you knew what I did for a living, you’d understand why, and I’m working on making my life more complicated, soon.
That’s why I asked, who can do this? I’d think either someone who’s already techy, or someone who’d love some free tech advice. Either type person would be good at it. š
maryb2004, would you take it on? My take is all you’d have to do is post it, and people would come. (You know, “If you build it, they will come.” Heh.
My schedule rivals yours and wednesdays are my late day when I don’t get home until after nine. Cafe hosts need to be there to interact and I can’t promise it on Wednesdays. (And, its so depressing when the cafe host has something to do on Saturday night and leaves, gloating about it).
I think I could help out on Wednesdays, although I don’t know how. But, um… is it okay to be a bit unreliable for the hour that Lost is on? I’m west coast, so it should be sort of quiet…
would you mind reposting this in the current cafe thread so more eyes will see it? Don’t worry about the technical stuff, there are plenty of people to show you some simple tricks to the trade. Thx for volunteering!
(and no worries about the Lost hour, I have a full-time job and still host on Tuesdays….shhhh don’t tell my boss)
Will do, thanks.
Manee, I can do sundays, if that’s ok with everyone, now that I am settled in new home….
you don’t even have to ask, the cafe was born out of your leadership. Glad to hear that you’re finally getting settled.
I would love that. š
Yay!!!!
to Laura and all above, then consider it done, I will do Sundays…
It’ll be great to have you back, Diane. We’ve all missed you!
Way Cool…missed ya!
Peace
I’d love to have a tech night since I’m very technically challenged. Great idea. And great diary.
I’m logged on from a different browser than I was when I wrote the diary, one I’ve never really used. I’ve been having speed problems with Internet access recently, so asked my computer club for advice earlier today. 5 people gave advice, one was to try Firefox.
The rest of the list will take time to work through, but includes the classic unplug modem and router, wait, plug in again, which I hadn’t bothered to try yet. Group problem solving of tech problems really works š
I’d be willing to contribute my little bit of Mac knowledge for the other Apple users in the audience…but I’d want a co-host who could help on the Windoze side (and maybe someone with a smattering of Linux as well).
My main problem right now is keeping the wireless network up and running; evidently there’s some sort of problem with the firmware that Apple’s aware of and is (allegedly) working on…
This would be so helpful. š
Whenever I read “right” click, I think, “Uh oh.”
Read it as “click while holding down control key” on your Mac.
There ya’ go. Ask and it shall be answered. (I’m not “techie” at all – just a Mac user since my first 128k man-in-the-box.)
I don’t usually bother to correct my typos – but, of course, I did mean “mac-in-the-box.”
OK, do your worst about Freudian slips . . .
I was just wondering where you shop for Mac stuff – thanks for a good laugh š
And thanks for the “click” explanation.
Thanks for a great laugh!
vs “control” key on Mac. In general, what’s “control-whatever” for Win is “command-whatever” for Mac.
As
control-s / command-s = save, for win / mac platforms, respectively.
Ohhh, I can’t wait to see a discussion about Firefox and even one person abandon MS’s Lookout Explorer, and have a safer computer.
Susanhu.
š
Have never used a m$ based machine(pc)…I suspect there are quite a few of us here.
Great idea…since I’m not a techie I’ve gotten an amazing amount of knowledge and help from people here and would love to learn more as well as offer what assistance I can.
Peace
After reading Susan’s diary yesterday about her moniter, I called Shirlstars and asked if she wanted to send the moniter she previously had asked me if I needed, she said yes and then I called Susan to tell her. So I just want to make sure that she is set up with a moniter now and then I will tell Shirl to cancel.
Please let me know.
Good idea for a diary.
We’re communicating about this, looks like a go.
About ten years ago, a friend was building a timber-frame house (aka post-and-beam). She gathered together friends and friends of friends, and we all did a little bit. I had a very small part in raising one of the walls, and every time I went to that house when it was finished, I had a sense of family and pride in it.
We’re so brainwashed by the myth of the solitary American that we forget the things that LookingUp has said so well. And if you’re like me, you were brought up to brush off praise and nice comments. “Oh, it’s nothing.”
When you do that, you throw it right back in the other person’s face, so learn to hang out with the uncomfortableness and let the compliments in. In doing so, you give a gift as you are receiving one.
Wonderful diary!
The roots of this lack of community are fascinating, since the phenomenon is so very new. Even as recently as the 1960s, it wasn’t uncommon for neighbours to help each other out in this way. These days, you get odd looks if you try and approach neighbours and offer help, and you get even odder looks if you ask for it, or suggest helping some other neighbour.
I’ve seen it blamed on TV before, but I think that’s bunk. More likely culprits: suburban lifestyle and conservativism. The effect of the suburban lifestyle should be obvious, but what about conservativism? Doesn’t it preach a return to the values of yesteryear? Well, no, not really. What it does is preach a return to what conservatives like to claim were the values of yesteryear… Including self-reliance. Needing help, in this view, is a weakness.
The disintegration of community, I’m sure, has many contributing factors. These are some I have considered from both reading and observing:
Suburbia didn’t do it right away. There were neighborhoods. And hot summer nights the kids were out playing and the adults were porch sitting or strolling. TV had reruns in the summer and the number of programs were limited.
Add air conditioning to expanded programming, and the neighborhoods evolved into these closed up houses with humming machines and blue flickering lights.
And the programming? How do you think “conservatism” was passed along? Think “Gunsmoke” and “Father Knows Best.”
Women in the workforce in greater numbers tended toward the “feminization” of the workplace with more and more “community” sense experienced at work. And “home” became this more isolated island of one family, especially when the family had moved away from other members of the family for…work.
Read that before. It was a fundamental shift in destroying community. As was, of course, leaving farm life, where harvest, making cider, so forth, created jobs so big other people’s help was very needed. And trading help back and forth on those jobs was very natural.
Again — what are our opportunities to reverse this? One group where I live has created “Friday night at the meaningful movies”. Movies like the Walmart movie, or about resisting armed services recruiters, civil rights movement, or about Argentina… etc.
A core group of about 5 people started this. They show the movies in a church basement, which they rent,and then circle the chairs for a discussion. They hope to spin it off to different areas of the city. It’s fantastic.
On the face of it, it’s great AND it builds community.
Anything similar going on in your area?
It doesn’t even have to necessarily be serious. I think there’s a reason why most traditions like this, in the past, revolved around food. Food’s a common interest, relatively cheap, and extremely inoffensive. If you can manage to find some other culinary maniacs in your area, recipe/ingredient-trading could be a great way to start something like this. And culinary maniacs are easy to find – most of the time, you just have to follow your nose. Lending books can also work very nicely, though literary maniacs can be harder to find. Gardening’s another good option, especially since you have to actually be outdoors to encage in it, which makes finding other gardeners and engaging them in conversation easier.
The key is, I think, discovering common interests. In the situation you mentioned, the organizer managed to find a bunch of people with an existing interest in politics. Not everyone’s that lucky (or unlucky, depending on which people you get š ), but finding a bunch of people nearby with one common interest and trying to build other common interests off that is a good start.
Community-building’s actually become a fairly serious study amongst techies lately, as building a community around your site or software is now regarded as a vital part of success. Unfortunately, I’ve yet to find any good blogs on it, but I’d imagine that many of the techniques there could be applied to real life as well.
Someone want to start a diary series on this?
Uh, cough, I just did.
Would you do the second one? Or, what would you specifically like to see discussed in another one?
The rest of what you said is right on re food. Very astute. They have food at the movies. š And when I organized volunteers for mailings or whatever in the past, I always had food there.
I meant a series about community-building techniques.
.
Tue Jan 10th, 2006 at 03:26:44 PM PDT
Last month ET passed its 6-month anniversary without much fanfare, while enjoying steady growth. However, this past month has been dominated (from my point of view, maybe others will disagree) by two discussions of whether ET (especially its front-pagers and, more specifically, Jérôme) is anti-British or anti-Russian.
It is quite likely that this is a result of ET’s success: as it grows it is more likely to rub people the wrong way, or to get noticed in the first place, or to become difficult to ignore.
Anyway, last summer, well before I found out about ET, I spent some time reading a classic book in group psychology, Experiences in Groups by W. R. Bion, which I discovered by reading a very interesting online article about “social software” called A Group Is Its Own Worst Enemy.
This diary is my attempt at understanding the latest spate of “is ET bigoted?” debates, and is based largely in ideas from those two sources. Take it with a grain of salt: not content with dabbling in economics, now I take on psychology. Physicists never learn.
[…]
.
I learned my early lessons from the school playground. A spat is between two persons, don’t butt in to interfere, let it be a fair fight. Problems arise when others start bullying, or join the fight in defense of one side.
It happens at dKos with troll rating wars. Sometimes I see it happen here in diaries with high quantity of comments and with low content contribution to the original diary. Want to fight? Write your own diary and open the discussion …
I don’t see a group process at ET, very similar to troubles of cohesion in the EU. Each writer has his/her own bigotry, the bloggers at ET will keep the extremes within check and everyone will have a lot of freedom in expression of ideas and be able to contribute to a great site.
Attack Jérôme and other frontpagers? Sure, they are human like us aren’t they.
“Treason doth never prosper: what’s the reason?
For if it prosper, none dare call it treason.”
by Oui on Tue Jan 10th, 2006 at 04:52:16 PM PDT
“But I will not let myself be reduced to silence.”
▼ ▼ ▼ MY DIARY
AC is definitely an isolating technology.
During college (in Texas) I spent one summer living with other volunteers at a community center in the barrio. I was at first extremely bummed that the house had no air conditioning. The organization’s founders (who lived a couple blocks away) explained that they had given AC a try in their own home but found that it cut way down on the time they spent outdoors and interacting with neighbors. So they gave it up, permanently.
I survived a very hot summer, despite nights when the temp never went below 85 degrees, and I gained a lasting respect for lifelong social justice activists who really walk the talk.
You know, in the 60’s my experience was that my parents were in a neighborhood where everyone’s parents drove their car to the store to get a new bag of sugar, vs borrowing a cup from the neighbor to get tonight’s recipe done, then getting a bag when next at the store.
They had grown up in a world that was a sea of trading help back and forth, but living in the world of “nuke family independence”. I was astonished to find out that some kids had grown up, same time as myself, with that trading of services.
I subsequently lived in a small town. Loved it. Since, even though I’m living in the city, I tend to get out and mingle in the ‘hood. Meet the neighbors. I tend to be the person on the block who knows the most people. Why the heck not, you never know what you’ll learn, and/or when you can cooperate.
The Chinese lady across the street told me I am the only person on the block besides her husband who talks to her. How sad is that? I was telling her someone’s wife had died, she didn’t even know. Now, she’s fairly reclusive, but how is it that I talk to her occasionally? We end up in our yards at the same time… She wanted me to help her vote, asked me who to vote for.
Do any of you talk to people in your neighborhoods? Work to bring people together? I’ve had two gatherings where I invited everyone in a 2-block area over since moving in (8 years.) Have you done that? Or a block party? My invitation said, “I’m not Martha Stewart, and my house is decorated in ‘Advanced Yard and Estate Sale’.” Didn’t want to shock anyone š
I had Dean parties here — boy was that great? Did you do that to build local community?
I am so pleased to see this diary. I’ve been reading the various conflict-ridden diaries on and off today – and have felt sad, and torn. Too much to do commenting; too depressed about here (home), and here (Boo) to speak.
The question is, how to be a community, without face-to-face communication. Those who saw each other in Crawford or DC, or who have formed special bonds, like Shirlstars and Diane, have immeasurably more community that a lot of the rest of us, particularly those who don’t diary or comment regularly.
The Cafes are great, but a lot of the time it feels like standing on the darkened edge of a room, watching the friends in the middle, lighted areas talking of things not known to the watcher. (As you can see, I’m really in an inward mood at the moment, I’m not usually this out of it.)
I have a friend who escaped Russia before the Iron Curtain feel. The one thing he misses from those days, is the consideration people had for each others children. If someone saw a child in trouble, or misbehaving, or alone, hurt, etc. they would help.
Not in America, my friend says.
I do think the Repubs are partly responsible for this. Every family an Island unto itself. In my own field, there is a division between those who believe in the “lone wolf” model of researchers and those who believe in the “collaborative” model. God help the young scientist if he/she is hired into a setting with a model that doesn’t fit their own way of doing research.
I do think one of the special things about the Dean campaign was the social service activities that we did, the working together, even for small, human things like bringing frozen meals for the volunteer who was overwhelmed with three sick kids at the same time.
I was stunned, like you, LookingUp, that SusanHu had such a crappy computer/monitor! If she lived next door, and we knew her as well as I know my neighbor here, that would never have happened! Good small towns and big city neighborhoods and tight rural and suburban communities are like that, but they have been vanishing in waves of financial/ethnic/cultural segregation and suspicion.
Can we build that closeness here in this community? I don’t know. I love so much of what I see in people’s personality and little snippets of their lives here, but there is still little that we do that touches actual life directly. That’s the painful thing about troubling Booman or Susan, it is a bigger part of their lives, most certainly.
Anyway, thanks for this diary, and for the opportunity to let me ramble on a bit in the middle of the night. My husband is sick, and I’m worried about him. I’m not used to being helpless, and it is frustrating and frightening.
next time you feel like you’re on the outside looking in at the Cafe, do what I do at a party — butt in. š
Hmmm…wonder if it’s time for another Welcome Wagon… š
Thanks, Cali. Sometimes I do. Being a “watcher” in my work tends to breed watching rather than jumping in.
I can relate. (Though he’s not as reserved as he used to be — he at least participates in family gatherings instead of retreating to a back room with a book.)
He lurks here on occasion, but I doubt if he’ll ever post (even if/when we get our new desktop system, and I install software so he can learn how to type)…
Everybody in the cafe didn’t know anybody else in the cafe originally (okay, except kansas and katiebird). We’re a very eclectic bunch so anybody that shows up fits right in.
Thank you for clarifying that Andi š
I didn’t know anyone when I got on a plane and took off for DC.
well… I hadn’t met these folks “in person”. But due to the internet – you may not meet peoplin “in person” but you get to meet their “persona”.
My husband says I’m an extrovert… extremely outgoing…Bullshit! I just know there’s not enough time to wait for it to come to me – so I go to it.
I think it was Supersoling or Brotherfeldspar who remarked on my ability to go up to people in hte street and start talking to them – and get hugs from them. I sw no big deal. It was another lady in a codepink t-shirt. I figure. She had me go up to her – we met – we hugged – we got some courage to maybe do it again and she’ll go up to another herself.
not only to build community here, but also in our 3D lives. Any little step towards it is important, I believe. I think anything we can share with our neighbors or an affinity group — even a walk in the park or a run to the store, combined trip to the Goodwill, it all matters.
Regards your husband, hope you have a phone friend, or email friend to talk to about it, at least. Very no fun situation.
Aside, Susan’s computer is AOK, fairly new. It’s just the monitor.
You’re welcome for the diary.
Great Diary!
I have a feeling we’ll all be needing as much community as we can create before long. And we will need both a local community and a national/world community.
Here in ND folks still get together to do projects, particularly in the rural areas, but the tradition is alive in the cities too.
During pioneer times, for our grandparents or great grandparents, working together was a necessary element of survival.
The most likely cause for today’s equivalent of a “barn-raising” is a health crisis, or death. If a farmer is unable to get his/her crop off due to an emergency, the neighbors will show up and do in hours and days what would have normally taken weeks to do. There are heart warming stories of these events every year.
Everyone I know who grew up here remembers that their parents tapered off on visiting and card playing around the time the TV became a household appliance, ’54-’60. So I do think TV’s delivery of entertainment at home inhibited the search for entertainment outside the home.
Times change, lifestyles change, and attitudes change along with it.
Kidspeak brought up the concept of consideration. I do think consideration of others as a mode of behavior has declined.
I noticed that for several months after 9-11 it had somewhat of a revival. So it still survives in people’s hearts. We need to bring consideration back into our lives again.
Then maybe we’ll be better prepared and be able to do a better job of looking after each in the event of emergencies.
I remember when my grandmother passed away, and we (and the rest of the family) converged on her small West Virginia town for the funeral — all the neighbors brought casserole after casserole, desserts, vegetables, more than enough food to feed everyone at the house, so that all we had to do was warm it up at mealtimes.
This kind of barnraising community spirit is also happening in New Orleans — in fact, it’s groups like the Common Ground Collective that are making the biggest difference in helping people get their lives back together, repair and rebuild, clear debris, and so on.
Yes, this is exactly the kind of thing that is needed. I’m in the middle of our country’s poorest big city.
We live in a pretty close neighborhood, and a small group of people got together and began to rehab abandoned by fixable houses, one by one, usually getting them free or for back taxes. They’ve been sold to new owners, basically at the cost of the rehab, plus enough to start the next rehab. Lots of sweat equity from the “investors”, but great payoffs in new neighbors and a stronger city.
It didn’t take a lot to do this, and it has brought people together who otherwise wouldn’t be involved together.
Bravo. What a wonderful communication, and it brought to mind this song: “If I Had a Hammer” ….yeppers, I’m an ol’ school type of guy…you can tell by the music.. ; )
When I read Susan’s piece yesterday it brought this to mind. Just look at all the articles she not only reads, but writes, DAILY….what dedication that represents.
Too often we get these images in our heads of what a person is, looks like, lifestyle, etc, etc. But after reading her post, I saw only complete dedication from an individual that in the truest form of an artist, suffers for her work, and her case it is an art.
This article you have written put a new spot of hope in heart, and for that, I THANK YOU.
Community efforts, and caring is what will carry us through these dark times we are witnessing of mankinds “Greed Era”
Peace to all, and a new spark of Hope for all.
Wado my friends.
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hand me that hammer.
I feel like accidentally dropping it on a repug asshead protesting below, incoherently shouting something about nola building permits “not being in order”.
“But I will not let myself be reduced to silence.”
▼ ▼ ▼ MY DIARY
Hammer in hand.
Ready to build.
It is always uncomfortable to find fighting within the group a not so good thing. But then let someone fromthe outside come in and fight with us or pick a fight, we all seem to come together and fight off the intruder. That is the way it was in my family. :o) I grew up in such a community where if someone needed something and the community could find ways to help they most certainly would. This seems to have faded away somewhat in most communities nowadays. Sadly to say, in my neighborhood, that when something happens that is horrible such as a death or such, only the very closest of the neighbors respond, not the entire community. I do think that this is about to change. Our neighborhood just this fall decided to have a community yard sale. Sadly, I was working away from home at the time, but this up coming fall, I intend to be a part of this and get to know our neighbors more than in the past. We must come together no matter what to make our world good. Well, at least our little piece of this world.
I want to say to each of you here, I love you all and would not know what to do without you all. HUgs and more hugs….
Oh and also, this was a very good and needed diary…thanks….
Spouse and I are academics, with the privilege in recent years of teaching at small colleges and now living in a small town. It makes a huge difference. You can live here and find suburbia-style anonymity if you want — and sometimes the fishbowl of interwoven relationships feels cramped, especially for the city-bred — but in general, just living our lives in spaces that frequently bring us into contact with the same two or three score of people generates community. The folks who work together also play soccer and poker together, and they all pick up their mail at the same post office (many living within walking distance), and there is only one coffee shop and one drugstore in town, with no drive-through. So we bump into people a lot, and feel we know them, and feel known. When your neighbors mostly work for the same institution that you do, then there’s not a great deal of ice to break, and the same local events tend to affect people together.
Aside from this, the two main sources of community in my “bricks-and-mortar” life, especially in the sense of practical support, comes with my involvement in a faith community (my Quaker Meeting) and a mothers’ community (La Leche League). LLL is about mother-to-mother breastfeeding support, but our local group also takes meals for a few weeks to moms with a new baby, and we have an e-mail group and meet for playdates with our preschoolers. We watch each other’s kids for free — a huge boon. When my brother died suddenly, after I returned from the memorial service, my LLL friends brought meals just as if I was recovering from childbirth. And I want to underscore that in this particular community, we couldn’t really care less about each other’s political views or party affiliations. Or religions or even sexual orientation. It’s just about being moms and raising families in a society that doesn’t support those pursuits most of the time.
My Quaker Meeting provides that wide age-range that is missing in our nuclear family (distant from all kin on both sides) — sort of built-in aunties and grandparents for all the kids. When somebody needs something, Meeting can often help, even though we are a small group with no property and not much budget. One of my favorite parts of belonging to this Meeting is twice a year when we look at our budget and decide where to send the few thousand dollars in donations that we don’t need to pay our phone bill. It goes to local soup kitchens, national peace campaigns, global service organizations. And we’re not hoity-toities on a board of directors — just folks sitting in a circle discussing needs and pooling our resources.
Meeting also does regular service activities that bring our members together outside of worship and helps us contribute beyond our Meeting. There’s a Habitat for Humanity interfaith build in the area; I can’t go swing a hammer because it’s not a safe place for my 4yo to spend a Saturday — but I can organize food contributions so the volunteers get lunch.
The more I think about it, what facilitates community in my offline life more than anything else is getting my butt out the door of my house. I take regular walks with our dog, and after doing that for 3 years in the same neighborhoods, strangers now greet me in other settings with, “I always see you out walking with your dog, how nice to finally meet you!” A neighbor told me that she hangs her laundry on a clothesline not just for ecological or economical reasons but because it usually gives her a chance to chat with neighbors as well. I know that when I spend too much time inside the walls of my house, I get depressed. I think we were not designed emotionally or psychologically for the isolation generated by contemporary urban design and popular architecture. Resisting the isolating tendencies of the spaces we inhabit feels liberating and usually brings interesting and positive social interaction into my life. I know it isn’t as readily achieved by people living in other settings (how do you walk places if there are no sidewalks, for example?) but I heartily recommend this “accidental” approach to community-building.
Ahh, a barn raising. That’s why you’re looking up! š Great diary!
Community is important, but we can’t substitute for it on the internet. Not even on a blog like this one, which in many ways comes as close as is possible.
It’s important, vitally important, to be able to connect with our RL neighbors and participate in organizations, personal face to face meetings… a community like this can be a supplement but never substitute for face to face contact.
Great diary!
Funny, I was thinking along the same lines last night, w re Ductape’s “museum quality” computer. Asked the computer expert in the house,
“Hey, hon, what’s up with that cube you recently replaced w the new iMac? Is it worth anything?”
“Hard drive’s shot.”
“I have this blogger friend who needs an upgrade, think it would do him any good?”
“Probably not. For what you’d pay to replace the harddrive, you could get a much better PC, or the Mac mini…..”
Anyway. Great diary. Rec’d.
Will look forward to seeing updates and how things develop.
you would never locate ductape anyway. His location is more hidden than Dick Cheney’s.
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Just before midnight – heh, who has been sneaking most of these views without reporting back to us?? (actual avg. 19,135 per day)
What day is BooMan’s birthday – any bets on № of views on that special day …
BooMan's Place
“But I will not let myself be reduced to silence.”
▼ ▼ ▼ MY DIARY
Lookingup, did you see my question upthread, have you arranged to get a moniter to Susan, if so please let me know, so we can cancel sending, or if not we can continue process. thanks
Yes, we’ve communicated. Or — I found out it was indeed myself she thought was sending her a monitor.
If it doesn’t work right, maybe we’ll tap you all again. Sorry no sooner reply!
Love one another and serve one another. This, to me is the essence of what the custom of barn-raising is all about.