Maybe it was the button I picked up one day, a few decades ago, on the college campus quad area: “If It Moves, Fondle It.” Maybe it’s just me … but I hate pretending to be prissy or getting uptight about normal human intereactions and functions.

Back to the veterinarian’s office yesterday. I’m waiting for the tech to bring out Leo from the recovery room. A woman with two middle-school-aged girls is chatting vivaciously with another vet tech. They’re talking about how much fun they’re all having with swing dancing.


Dancing! I love to watch it, even that silly show on ABC, although the PBS shows are vastly superior for the dancing and the music. So I ask them, “Hi! Do any of you watch the ABC dancing show?”


“Well, only parts of it.”


“Oh,” I say. “And did you see the PBS championship ballroom dancing competition last week?”


“Only some portions. Some of the Latin dances …”


“Why?” I ask. ” I think it’s so gorgeous.”


“It’s much too provocative.” Both of them sniff a bit. The other one: “Yes, much too provocative.”


I kind of made a face but got the picture. It’s wrong to have sexual and sensual feelings? Typical me. I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. “Oh, for the love of god,” said I. They didn’t reply. What would you have said? Maybe I should have talked loudly about “my friend’s” undescended testicles. (I’ll bet those teen girls have abstinence rings too, as if that means a damn thing. Ugh.)

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