Each of us face different choices on a daily basis. For me there are three basic types of choices and ways of living. I’ve broken my worlds down into just three categories:
- Status quo
- Spiritual
- Activist
Status Quo
A lot of people choose the path of least resistance – the living day to day and accepting the status quo. This means getting up in the morning, going to work, and doing what society expects of us. It means buying into the `conformity is good’ theme that is rampant in our society in the U.S. For many of us there is an underlying level of dissatisfaction in this choice but fear keeps us from doing anything about change.
Spiritual Path
Inside our hearts we may seek another path. This is a path of love and kindness and healing. There can be a strong desire to be giving and caring. We have a need to nurture ourselves and others. Our hearts know a place of peace. There are moments when this peace surrounds us and touches every part of our being. Too much of our time this part of our hearts and souls are pushed beneath the surface. It is too confusing and out of the norm for others to accept this aspect of us.
Activist
This is the fighter in each of us. A place where we scream – enough is enough or “I’m mad as hell and not going to take it anymore”. Here we stand and fight the system, the abusers and oppressors, the politicians, the greed and most of all the status quo. Here is where what we stand for as a person, and our humanity to others, is put to the test. This place is outside of our comfort zone. This is where the blinders that we wear regarding the status quo are ripped away.
When worlds collide
Each day I get up and go to work in an environment that is adverse to change. This means processes change but internal philosophies do not. It also means acceptance that there will be those that will do no more than necessary. “But it’s not my job” is a recurring theme in this environment of those around me. It is easy to buy into this philosophy and do only what is required. It is hard to push the envelope on a daily basis to leave behind a better work environment for others.
My spiritual life is growing stronger each day. I can look at the trees and rocks and clouds and sun and moon. . . and feel at one with the world around me. There are spiritual people around me – as near as the touch of a hand and as close the internet. These people hear my thoughts and beliefs and do not question. Most importantly they stand behind me to help me if I stumble and fall in my quest. Yet those that help do not interfere in my quest…they recognize the need for each of us to seek and learn on our own. These special people are my guides and mentors.
Each day the news of war and greed and oppression greets me via the radio, tv, newspapers, blogs, and just by listening. It is part of the day that I truly feel `if you are not outraged you are not paying attention’. In paying attention there is so much anger within that it finds it’s outlet in political activism. For some of us it is in organizations with others, for some the blog diaries, for others in marching against the war, and sometimes it some of each. When totally focused on a cause it can bring great satisfaction from believing that we are making a difference. It can also bring hope that we impact the world around us to make changes.
So – these worlds have collided…status quo and no change, spiritual peace and searching, and activism fighting for change. Prioritization and balance have been placed in conflict. I’m not sure if others have these conflicts. However, in my experience I am not alone in these thoughts and feelings. As we have worked to make changes in the political world we have learned from each other. Perhaps now is the time to share how we balance these conflicts in our lifes and learn from each other.
For now there are no answers….just a recognition that these worlds have collided.
there is conflict and growth and some are a struggle….
This is an acknowledgement of our conflict…not a walking away from it. Perhaps a place for each of us to share our own conflicts and release some of the pressure that surrounds us.
Peace
I can’t honestly say that there is always a “balance”. Mine is mostly an ad hoc approach, whatever works on that particular day. I can’t draw any conclusions from my experiences that would be useful to this discussion.
So why am I making any comment here at all? Simply to say that loved ones may not share the same level of concern that we have. And although we may feel like ranting and screaming at the Bushco atrocity du jur, for our less concerned significant others (and other close individuals), we must have patience and understanding though it may test our own patience.
The ones we love that are not as involved truly do receive the brunt of our rants.
Testing our patience – this is so very true. What little patience I have is tested on a daily basis with Bushco. Perhaps that is why I ponder whether we take time for the balance of our worlds. Sometimes I wonder if it is okay to just let it be for a day or so. Or will another atrocity occur when I’m not looking?
Thanks for dropping by…this was more philosophical than anything today. A meaning of life kind of diary!
Oh, Boran2 – oh contraire đŸ˜‰
You have been leading by example – didn’t you know?
I follow your Saturday Landscapes faithfully, even when I don’t get to them on a Saturday. I have learned about position and proportion. I have learned that it is possible to paint over in acrylic. I have learned about the differences color and shading can make. I have learned about frames.
And the December art gallery you put together – oh my. I saw all kinds of beautiful things people had made.
You remind me that taking the time to look closely is important – a life skill that is well-practiced through art. Thank you.
You are far too kind!
Some moments I want to take the whole world in my arms and rock back and forth, saying, “Sh-sh-sh–hush now, it will be okay. There is so much that is beautiful and good.”
Then there are other moments that, I know, if I had the world in my hands, I would smash it to the ground and stomp on it.
Some where at some time I was given a definition of suffering, “Wanting things to be other than they are.”
So I seek acceptance, but it doesn’t come very often. Dang hope keeps springing up. But when the hope is not met, then I slide into fear, anger, depression.
Your west coast meet up, particularly Diane101 and Shirlstars’ meeting, really offered me an insight. As I read of the meetings, the excitement and joy, I was beaming. And it crossed my mind, “A happy ending.” And then I thought, wait a minute, these are real people – not a book, this isn’t an ending!
I realized, there are no happy endings, only happy moments. So for me, this means doing things without any expectation of a happy ending, instead, being on the lookout for happy moments.
Though you were writing about work: Each day I get up and go to work in an environment that is adverse to change. This means processes change but internal philosophies do not.
I think I need to watch for when this happens internally.
Suskind wrote a very relevant diary, SOFT SHOULDER – The only good activist is a live activist
And in it he wrote:
tampopo, I wish we could hotlist comments. I need to read this one on a regular basis. Thanks for your wisdom.
This is so much of what we miss when see only one facet of our lives. It is easy to get caught up in the office or the rage of politics or the spiritual and miss the balance of the others.
There was so much strength and energy in the meet-up. It brought together apparently different people with an interest in politics. Yet what we found in each other was caring friends, loving and spiritual people, and folks just like us…getting by day to day.
The haiku is marvellous…many times we can stop the anger and pain by recognizing the sameness in others.
Peace Tampopo
Honestly, Sally, I cannot say right now. Let’s see, I would love to be able to contribute here, but in this moment, I have no methods yet. I am in the process of restarting my life as of Friday night with my SO permanently now. We are merging belongings, stuff, habits, routines and pets, yes, one dog each. That said, I find we have our own balance already. Certainly, that is between us, but we have our own dynamic which is melding wonderfully, has melded really, into one.
That all said, I’d like to share a story from last night. I’m not sure it’s exact meaning, but I’ll glean something more from it one day, I’m sure. I’m not sure it speaks so much to balance per se, as it does to perspective and recognizing its importance in our lives and in our attitudes. Or maybe it has nothing to do with any of that, I’ll let you take from it what you will.
OK, last night, SO took the puppy out for the brief nightly walk, about five minutes to let her do her thing if necessary. He came back in, and said he felt a weird funky vibe out there… Something evil, dark, death, some wrong in the cosmos… very odd. The pup felt it too he said, as she pulled her way back home, which she does not usually do. He explained a bit more of what he felt. I recalled that actually just a bit earlier when I was downstairs switching the laundry, that I had gone and double-checked the basement door locks, something which I almost never do, because I never use that door. After that, we went around and checked all the doors and windows to be sure they were locked. We both went outside with Jasper when she went out before bed, just cuz, and Jasper was just staring off oddly into this one direction, didn’t do anything, and then we went back inside.
We both had a bit of trouble falling asleep. My thoughts were just results of being unable to turn my mind off, which is not unusual. But, after watching 4 crime drama shows during the evening, and then with the funky feelings, it was a bit not surprising that I was feeling a bit funky, weird, and yes, frightened. As I tried to sleep, my thoughts ran the gamut, from what if we are bombing Iran at this very moment, to what if some horrific attack has occurred, to what if there is some local danger, potentially heading our way to do us harm, or what if it was something on a more personal level, just some knowledge of the cosmos…
Anyway, somehow and all of a sudden, and late at night, I realized I had to stop letting the outside get to me (stop letting me fear it and letting the unknown affect me), and instead send out my love and my strength into the cosmos. OK, so I did it, blew it into the cosmos through the slightly open window, found the one star that I could see, and blew out into the cosmos my love, my strength, my peace and my hope. And yeah, so I symbolically used tobacco smoke to do just that, but I did just that. I blew out my hopes and love into the universe. I hope it helped, actually, I know it did somewhere, somehow…
And that funky feeling we all felt, well… my SO’s almost-ex SIL’s mother passed away last night. He really likes his SIL and his family. We kinda figured that’s what we all felt here, even if we don’t exactly know at all what any of it means. I don’t know if that shows any sort of balance or all, but at least we are still connected… And that does a great deal, for me, at least, to know that we are still there and can still have that hope. Thanks for listening, and as always, thank you Sally sister.
By releasing the fear and outside influences, it seems that you are already learning the path to balance. I am so sorry about the woman’s mother dying. My hugs and love to each of you and to her family.
Taking the time to share our love, especially with families that we care about but are potentially in the middle of a split, is important. We meet people because of one reason, yet we love and care for them separately from the original. May there be balance for your relationship with friends, whatever the beginnings.
All my hugs and love to you my sister Sherm…and that wonderful guy that loves you.
Thank you so much Sally. I feel I am new, yet in a way old to some ways of thinking, because when I was in my early 20’s, I was very aware. At least I thought, nah, I know I was. I’m coming back into that now, after many years away. Thank you for your hugs and love, but I am certain that she is in a far better place now, even though I did not know her personally.
Yes, balance, for all, all friends and all loves. That wonderful guy tonight told me that finding his balance was reaching being 40 and realizing what he needed to do to be happy, to find his balance, to go and get what he wanted… It is very much a transition time now, but it just feels so good, as much pain as there is on several fronts. It will all be OK. There will be balance for all, in time… I so appreciate your wishes for that, for all whom I care for and for all whom are affected…
All my hugs and love to you too my special sister. Thank you so much, yet again… you speak so much to me and you do so much to give me strength… Thank you for that. That wonderful guy really appreciates you for that too, we both do so much. Peace and love to you and yours, as always honey… Thank you.
I’d like to add an odd little comment. I’ve been a legal editor and a poet and a legal secretary and so forth, and my wife has been a typographer and a publishing expert and so forth, and so we often observe details like this: the start of this diary is perfectly balanced, with exactly six lines given to each of the three categories in the premise. That’s a mark of a highly intelligent and careful writer, and I appreciate it very much!
I am humbled and flattered by someone with your experience appreciating my writing.
SallyCat, i love this post! You capture that struggle perfectly that I feel is constantly being waged inside of me.
As we have worked to make changes in the political world we have learned from each other.
Yes! That’s exactly how I feel. Each diary and comment I read on the blogs is absorbed like a sponge and challenges me to figure out how that message incorporates with my worldview, and if necessary, shake it up abit. I’m glad to have the opportunity to learn from people like you who are asking the questions that help keep us balanced as human beings.
Your words struck a chord with me.
I haven’t written a diary since March 23rd- the day me husband abandoned, deserted, walked out on me.
At first I was glad he left- he’s an alcoholic who had been sober for over a year but the pull to drink again was more powerful than me and the marriage. Status quo.
Then I started the internal blame game- I am very hard on myself. This marriage started on a lie and was an ongoing lie. My first question to him was did he drink or do drugs? He said no he could take it or leave it. Being a trusting soul I took him at his word, fell in love etc., etc. Once married I was astounded at how much this man drank, empty vodka bottles hidden everywhere, but I never saw him drink aside from a dinner out once in awhile. Until one day he came back from his salesman job that covered 3 states, sat in the driveway chugging down a big bottle of vodka. I was as shocked as one could be. I never saw anyone drink like that. Then I became the classic co-dependent and life was hell. My outlet was bashing Bush- He and my husband were so much alike-lie after lie and all that comes with lying-distrust, arguments, and eventually violence and jail time for him.
I did my soul searching and came across this pearl of wisdom. ” If someone who does not love and respect you leaves, they have given you a gift.” I am still wrestling with the gift.- Spiritual Path
Now I am busy cleaning up the mess he left- he had bounced all kinds of bills to utilities etc., and I’m cancelling stuff, finding assistance for fuel, electricity and maybe food stamps hoping to keep my home over my head until my daughter relocates to NC in a year or so at which time I will go with her family.
I am sometimes at my best during a crisis, but I fight with myself- what could I have done to save him, save the marriage etc., How can grown-ups be so immature (we’re in our 50s). blah blah blah.
It’s been almost a month and I think I can do this alone-live again. I am looking for some local political groups to enable me to get back into the game of life. -Activist
So, Sallycat, thanks for the outline/diary. I needed this at this moment of time:-)
(((((((roseeriter)))))))
Yes, you can.
Your worlds have collided very profoundly…but you are strong and can get through this. Fighting with ourselves – I know that so well. The conflicts are strong and pull at us from so many ways.
You’ve identified your worlds and can now seek the path and balance needed. You can do it!
Sending you lots of love and strength and healing energy. Blessed Be.
and it seems to be a daily thing for my marriage also. Left for San Antonio after a snit with my spouse as he felt I was being too negative about military issues then received a kind of frantic call from him when BuchCo announced that tactical nukes were A okay to use against Iran. We have to be so gentle and very easily forgiven with each other right now, it is imperative to our sanity. I wonder how other military couples and families are handling this……I know there is no possible way we are the only ones on this path right now.
Your worlds have had a head on but you still had hands outstretched to each other. The hands and hearts touching across the chasm of pain gives us a sense of balance. Someone else’s hand to keep us from falling too far.
I am absolutely positive you are not the only military couple facing this path. The path for military families is as old as time. 30+ years ago I faced one with my first husband. After almost a year of separation he was coming home from Korea (still Vietnam time frame). I had orders to go to Thailand shortly after he would arrive home. Thailand was in the middle of a major struggle. We fought with each other, yet hung on to the love. Then Saigon fell…and orders were changed and I was given early discharge. Military life changes with political events more than most know. Yet as a couple we had stumbled and held on.
You have stumbled and helped each other. We have watched and heard you for some time now. You are both strong and will get through this. As long as you keep the love and spiritual side at the front of this relationship balance you will have each other and succeed.
Collisions bring us to greater awareness.
What I finally was able to understand and incorporate was this: It is all spiritual. We as humans love our boxes with labels for everything. We like to, even feel we must, separate and compartmentalize the different areas (as we see them) of our lives. The higher perspective, the higher truth of it is that it is all spiritual. I didn’t get this insight overnight and I surely didn’t move to this perspective in one huge step. . .but it came eventually and I have had far less conflict since allowing it to reside within.
How is it that All Is Spiritual? Our spiritual self is our true self. We are all spiritual beings having a physical experience. The reason and purpose we chose to come into physical on this earth at this time is spiritual. Everything here is from spirit. Everything we do, say, think and feel is spiritual. We have held some concept that humans (which literally means God in man)are lesser, unworthy, far from divine creatures. It has been reinforced by pronouncements from religions and philosophies over the many centuries. Sinful, lower nature beings. . .that is who we were told we are. And it might help to remember that the original meaning of sin was “short of the mark.” Meaning that we all aspire to some higher version of our humanness.
We came into physical body for the experience of it. Everything here is just a collection of experiences. All that really is important in our lives is what we do with those experiences. Do we react to them or do we act upon them with insights gained?
So my dear Warrior Woman, I relate very much to your wondering how you reconcile your activism, your anger, your disgust and your overwhelming desire to “make things right.” And I relate very much to how that seems to be in conflict with your desire to live a peaceful and purposeful life. It is a change in perspective. It is an understanding of what is transpiring on this planet at this time. It is a knowing of who you are, why you are here and what your place in all of this might be. And ultimately, all things are tempered by your choice to rise to a higher view of the bigger overall picture of what is really going on. If you care to go more in depth and have more discussion of this, I will be glad to share my views in greater detail in email. shirlstars@gmail.com
You are doing very well on the path that you have chosen. Keep choosing peace and love, as you are.
Big Hugs
Shirl