I know, this might get me slammed over here, it might not.  I have watched the past few days and have been disenchanted, to say the least.  That said, I also have hopes that these words will be welcomed here… Actually, I know they will be.   My heart and soul are in a good place, and I know the heart and soul of BT are in the same place.
A bit of background…  I’m in a delicate spot at the moment…  My doggie Jasper, of not quite 14 years, passed away in my arms within the past month…  My ex-brother-in-law, who is my age, a young 36, has been diagnosed with cancer throughout his body, and they closed him up because they could do no more…  He has two kids, aged almost 3 and 7, and yeah, that has fucked with me a lot.  He is the sweetest guy, was separated from his wife, though she is now very fully by his side.  And yeah, I fear the next time I will see these people will be at his funeral.  I hate that.  I’ve been watching the ex-hubby’s dogs more than usual, so he can go be with him and his family on the weekends.

I made the decision months ago that I would go and volunteer at Yearly Kos, and that was my first real act of doing.  I’m getting into local politics now, to elect dems instead of repubs, of course, but YK was the stepping stone for me.  I worked the registration desk, and I worked it hard.  I thought there would be another woman to step in for me when I wanted to go see a panel or such, but that wasn’t the case.  She did a lot to help the cause beforehand, but it was me to be there in person.  So I worked from 7am to 7:30pm the first day, after spending several hours stuffing bags the afternoon beforehand, then got a bit of a reprieve the next morning.  Meaning, I showed up at 10:30 am the next day.  Since the panels were already underway, I felt the need to help out at the desk again.  Which I did for the majority of the day.  I did the same on Saturday… although things had definitely slowed down.  But I was still there.

I did see 10 minutes of Barbara Boxer’s speech, Markos’ speech on Thursday night, got up for Howard Dean’s 8:00 am speech on Saturday morning (then went back to the desk), Harry Reid’s speech, missed Mark Warner’s speech, but did go high up to the `party’ for about 45 minutes, was at PastorDan’s interfaith service, which was harder than I thought it would be for me, for personal reasons, and attended/coordinated a Cheers and Jeers meeting on Saturday night.  It was a long extended weekend.  I would do it the same way next year.  For me, this was my first jump into politics, other than blogging, emailing, phone calling, letter writing etc…  And it felt damn good.

One of my finer memories was of seeing this man go past in the hallway, his nametag said `RubDMC’ as he went past…  I went running down the hall to meet him, to thank him…  He hugged me…  I try to actively be a part of his Daily Iraq War Grief Diaries, and I usually am able to find them on Booman Tribune, and sometimes on Daily Kos.  I so needed to introduce myself to him…  Cuz he knew me through my screenname, and I just needed to say thank you to him.  Which I did.  Meeting him and thanking him was one of the most poignant parts of that weekend…  Seriously…

I also met several other folks, mostly Cheers and Jeers’ers, cuz that’s where I predominantly hang out, although I read just about everything on DK, BT, etc…  I got to `officially’ introduce myself to MSOC, whose writing I adore, even if I don’t visit daily.  I got to meet Joe Wilson, George Lakoff, numerous DKer’s whom I can’t name, cuz I was working the desk.  I didn’t hear anyone speak, unfortunately, but I don’t care.  I got to meet and greet a good chunk of people.  And the people I worked with were just the best.  I’d do YK the same way in a heartbeat.

I met CabinGirl, Booman, boran2, clammyc…  people from Booman Tribune…  I so wish I could have spent more time with them, but honestly, I was exhausted from working.  I saw Larry Johnson, but didn’t officially meet him, unfortunately.  I’m up at 3:30am now, and I guess what I want to say, is that I am so happy to have been there.  Yes, there has been shit after that, but what I took away from the event, was a period of working, of acting, of doing, and of  bringing that forward into my state and into my life.  As I’ve said, this was my stepping stone into action.  Whatever folks are fighting for, I’m now fighting for it at my level, in my state, in my home, and that is what counts.

I’m sorry if this sounds ramblely, but it is late, but I did need to get it out of my head.  So throw tips, flames, retorts, whatever, but for me, this event was my stone.  And it’s been over a week now, but I’ve finally gotten out of my head what I felt I wanted to say.  And I’m humbled by all those greater than me that I’ve met, and I’m promising to work for a better tomorrow, cuz today just really sucks.  The state of our nation sucks and I’m gonna be working to change that…  This is my stepping stone…  And I needed it…

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