Crossposted at nowhereweb.com & myleftwing.com
| Oh my, what an un-politically correct thing to say! Not only is this a foul mouthed approach to politics, but also a sexist one. Demanding all acceptable Presidential hopefuls have balls is unfair to the female democratic nominees like Hillary and..uh…Hillary.
But before you get out your pies, let me explain. The balls I am referring to are the metaphorical kind, not the sweaty kind. I suppose I could have just said courage, but as a word courage just does not carry the same wieght as balls does. Balls are exactly what we need come 2008. |
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Give us a candidate with balls and it won’t matter if they are a senator, a congressperson or wtf. Ross Perot proved that it can be done and Ross Perot was a blathering idiot. But he had balls. He ultimately did not win because he lost his balls when the republicans disrupted his daughters wedding….which took a lot of balls on the republicans part.
Kennedy: Huge balls, so huge only conventional weapons could stop them.
Johnson: Enough balls to get us into Vietnam, but not enough to actually run for office to try & get us out.
Nixon: Giant balls but his balls were outweighed by his paranoia. Today however, Nixon would thrive.
Ford: Picked for the spot precisely because balls were non-existent.
Carter: Small balls but a lot of heart. Needed to visit the Wizard. Result: 1 term
Reagan: Wrinkly, but still very large balls. In fact, the polar opposite of Carter, all balls, no heart.
Bush I. Might’ve had balls, but he suffered from an inferiority complex from having his testes constantly compared to Reagan’s. I think maybe he secretly only had one ball, hence the Wimp Factor Result: 1 term
Clinton: Immense & shiny balls but also high maintenance balls that needed constant polishing and fondling on the side.
Bush II: Faux balls. It’s Cheney & Rove who carry the real balls around. Each guy carries one ball around in one of those briefcases that you have to handcuff to yourself and say top secret on the side.
So who is out there on our side that actually has a pair?
Hillary: has balls, but w/ Bill as a husband/albaross she comes with four balls. Four balls is a walk and a walk only gets you to first base. Having four balls severely limits base running speed. Result: Yer OUT!
Edwards: The jury is still out on whether he has balls. What’s that thing on his face? Does that count? Has loads of heart. Looking like another possible Carter.
Clark: He’s a general, He must have a huge set. Plus he’s got all those medals. So why does he look so scared?
Feingold: It took a LOT of balls to have been the sole vote against the partiot act in the post 9-11 Senatorial environment. Took giant balls to vote against the Iraq war. Only problem is that he’s got matzah balls and that scares the hell out of our pragmatic senses. However, if you look at history, before a black guy ever gets to do something, a jewish guy usually gets to do it first.
So far I like Feingold. he’s got brains, balls and a heart and he stands behind his convictions and backs them up with articulate words. Plus, who better to get our fucked up finances back in order than a jew?
The question is can the democrats overcome the whipped puppy syndrome and nominate the right person for the job without over-worrying the electability factor?
My Electoral Politics Project Challenge is very simple.
Name one democratic hopeful for 2008 who’s got the balls, heart and the mind to go all the way in 2008 besides Russ Feingold.
Crossposted at nowhereweb.com