On Fridays, other people cat blog. I have no idea why. I probably paid less attention to my cats on Friday than any other day. Here at the pond, I focus on frivolity. It’s hard to engage in frivolity when CNN is saying Armageddon is scheduled for next Tuesday and my inbox is filled with disgruntled email. But here goes:
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work?
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Right where you left him.
Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have big fingers.
What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall?
Why don’t blind people like to sky dive?
Because it scares the hell out of the dog.
What’s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?
A bad golfer goes, whack, damn. a bad skydiver goes damn, whack.
What goes clop, clop, clop, bang,bang,clop clop clop?
An amish drive-by shooting.
How are a texas tornado and a tennessee divorce the same?
Somebody’s gonna lose a trailer.
Whaddya you got?