)which will have to be reworked many times before I send it! (Mostly because of my regrettable tendency to regress, digress, and egress!!)
Look Sen. Bond, you are a repub and I know this is not news to you. I DO NOT WANT A MONOLITHIC GOVERNMENT!!! Straighten up and put on that integrity thing and put on that “vision” thing. Put away that rubber stamp and no one will get hurt! Right now I am looking at a government in such disarray that it can only keep bleating out “talking points” incessantly (Sort of like one of those “tickle me Elmo dolls that my daughter wouldn’t take home for her kid!) Guess what? Nobody cares any more. We’ve heard them all and they were not that creative to begin with!
(Over the flip (flop?)
Now you still have power, oh yes! People still stand and salute when you enter a room I am sure. And people find themselves thrilled to be in the audience on those rare public appearances you make (Or do you?) And you can block traffic with your limo and you can block bills with a wave of your hand in committees and you can block bills coming to vote by (gasp, wheeze) filibustering! (Jeez, was it only yesterday you were saying that filibustering should not be ALLOWED any more? Boy, how times have changed!)
But, my son, time moves on and things do change to some degree. Right now the repub star is on the wane (you may have noticed?) And with poll numbers coming out it is clear the Murricans don’t much trust you guys any more. (Gee, I wonder why? Could it be the scandal of the week? Or maybe the war, or maybe the environment, or maybe the scandal of the month?) So the next time to vote will be pretty interesting, don’t ya think? And it isn’t very far away. And, look, the dems are raising more money (wasn’t that your last bastion, being able to blow the other candidate out of the water with all that money you were sloshing in?) Well guess what, things will be slightly different in the ability to do ads this time. And also, you have accumulated a horrible record which will allow for some really great ads for the folks opposing you. True, you still have Karl since nobody has managed to lay a finger on him legally, but HE HAS NOW BECOME NOTICABLE! That latter fact may become a problem cause Karl aint all that likable from an outsider’s perspective. And true you have the AG who is willing to run the gamut to be able to field all those lawyers (?) from Pat Robertson’s University. And you have those judges on SCOTUS that might come through even better the next time than they did in 2000. But you know – all those things have contributed to your image, son. Whereas Darth Cheney was soaking up all those dark vibes, now they are bleeding on(or shadowing) all of you repub congresscritters!
Now I agree, the moderate repubs and the so-called liberal repubs, few though they are will probably get slaughtered (or voted out) first being as they are all from states who hold such views, but the purple states are getting a lot bluer guys. Talent may have been no-Talent, but he lost a close one EVEN WITH GONZO’s legal help with those “election fraud” cases. And some of the RED RED states are turning purple (probably from trying to hold their breath looking for competency from Bushco!)
Now you and the dems have been remarkably competent (wow, this is hard to believe!) in restraining the efforts of third parties. This is now a big big problem for the electorate because you and the dems have been name calling each other for decades now leaving the majority of us leery of either of you. And I know some of that was calculated because it is hard for Rove to do his magic when big numbers of folks come out and vote! But, dear heart, you guys have really really screwed the pooch this time. Nobody wants you in power ANY MORE! Nobody wants this war. Nobody wants a do nothing government. They want services, they want (DO YOU HEAR ME???) oversight!!! And they want to know WHERE THEIR MONEY WENT!!!!
So I have a problem. I don’t love you, I don’t want you around any more, but I am afraid to leave the dems with absolutely NO opposition because they will almost be as bad as you guys were with no opposition.
So get busy with the integrity and vision thing and get over whatever vestiges of “potomac fever” you have (sober up!) and start talking to us voters as if you recognize THAT WE OWN THIS COUNTRY AND THAT ENORMOUS DEBT YOU BUILT UP!!!!
Sincerely but No love,
