Now, don’t get me wrong. In America, terrorists don’t have the right to prohibit cruel and unusual punishment from being inflicted upon them (i.e., torture) by the government. They don’t have the right to a speedy trial, the right to a jury of their peers or the right to face their accusers if and when a trial is held. They sure don’t have the right to apply for a writ of habeas corpus to protest their imprisonment. And by God, if we think someone even looks, sounds or has a name the least bit similar to that of a terrorist, they sure don’t have the right to board an airplane.

But one right they do have, the most precious right under our Constitution, is the right to go buy guns. You think that’s crazy? Well, go tell it to the National Rifle Association, bucko!

WASHINGTON — The National Rifle Association is urging the Bush administration to withdraw its support of a bill that would prohibit suspected terrorists from buying firearms. […]

In a letter this week to Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales, Chris Cox, NRA executive director, said the bill, offered last week by Senator Frank R. Lautenberg, a New Jersey Democrat , “would allow arbitrary denial of Second Amendment rights based on mere ‘suspicions’ of a terrorist threat.”

“As many of our friends in law enforcement have rightly pointed out, the word ‘suspect’ has no legal meaning, particularly when it comes to denying constitutional liberties,” Cox wrote.

And you thought conservatives were all authoritarians, manly men who love other, more manly men, telling them what to think and what to believe and when they can or cannot exercise their freedoms. Ha! You sure were wrong about that. Because there is no more fundamental, God-given right in America than the right to go buy the arms and ammunition of your choice free from any interference by Big Guvmint. And it doesn’t matter what you intend to do with those weapons, either. That’s none of the gaddammed FBI’s, CIA’s, DEA’s or local police officers’ business.

Because guns don’t kill people, people kill people. And if we stop selling guns to terror suspects we’re on the slippery slope to a world dominated by secretive and sinister international organizations like — the United Nations, for God’s sake! Better a thousand terrorists buy an arsenal of weaponry to murder tens of thousands of peace loving Americans, than one innocent person be deprived of his right to obliterate a squirrel at 300 yards with his high powered hunting rifle, or be deprived of destroying junk automobiles with his .50 caliber machine gun. And drink beer while doing it (don’t forget the beer).

So here’s to you, National Rifle Association, for preserving my one essential liberty, no matter who gets hurt because of it. You are true-hearted, red blooded Americans and Super-duper Patriots all! Whatever would our country do without you?

0 0 votes
Article Rating