Memorial day

Promoted by Steven D.

Some people take this time to have BBQ and party.  Some people take this time to travel and see family.  Some people take this time to visit the cemetery and place flowers at the grave side of lost loved ones.

I will do only one thing. I will go to the grave side of my middle child and give her some live flowers.  Live flowers are a tribute to her and her life.  She was full of life and she was bright and giving.  She was a veteran of the Navy Reserve and loved what she did in that regard as well.  She was loved by many and is missed by many too.  But there is not one day that does not go by that I do nto think of her.  I even have dreams of her at times.
Why am I writing about this today?  Well, I am not the only mother who has lost a child.  This is not normal, you know.  Parents are to go before the children…  Why is this?  I think because it hurts so damn bad.  I want to give you a shoe of which I have walked in for a few moments.

If I had lost her in a combat zone, I would have absolutely lost it totally.  So senseless and for what I would ask of myself.  By far, I am not the only mother who has lost a child for some maddened action of others.

Now I know why my very own Mother was disturbed when I went off to the military.  I have to say, until one walks in another’s boots, they simply do not understand.

Yes she chose to do this, as I did.  We never ask for the fighting of was when we chose to enlist.  We all have or very own reason to enlist.  To walk up and to say I want to die this year for what ever reason is not why one enlists. [clarification of death, Chris died in her bed at 2145 hrs while she thought, I am sure, she was safe][she was not in a war zone]
I know it was not my reason and it certainly was not Chris’ reason.  It was not my son’s reason either.
Both of my children enlisted and did their jobs very well.  I would hope to think I did my job well, too.

Most in the military does the job assigned to them well.  What we didn’t ask for was a job to be done for some else’s ego or foolishness or folly.

Just this past week, my son called me and informed me that he was wanting to re-enlist.  I went ballistic on him.  Now mind you, I am the most patriotic person you could meet, but this is such a fools candry that I could not stand listening to his reasons for this consideration.  

Now mind you, I do not want to interfere in my son’s life to tell him what to do or how to do it, but this would be such a mistake.  I know his heart was in the right place.  His MOS would send him right into the fighting.  He would be a hospital corpsman with the marines.  He was this for 8 years and he was great at his job.  He now has a new baby to think of as of next month.  He will be a father and things will change then.  He and his wife have never been parents and they do not know the feeling of such.  

Needless to say, I used every thing I had in my arsenal to tell him I did not want to loose another child.  I would simply be in the stupor of the insane, at that point. Would you call me selfish??!!

Now mind you, I would not mind him being in the military and fighting, if for something we all felt worthy of fighting for.  But this is senseless.  I do not want to loose another child for the ego or legacy of one very crazy man and his administration that is so bitterly hated by many in our society, including myself.

So ladies and gentlemen, I want to take this time to say thank you to all the service men and women who do honorably serve….to all who have lost their lives and to the families who now suffer their loss.  My heart is with you and I pray you will have the will to help stop this needless and useless war/occupation.  

Just know, how very lonely for my daughter I am on this day and every day.  This is what parents feel when they loose a child.  This is something that no one in congress feels, it seems and I have to say I am very bitter about this for they seem not to understand or know the feeling of such a loss, it seems. If they have lost a child or loved one, tragically, they they should be the first to understand.

Just take time to hold onto your family this time of the year and (well) all year long, each and every year you can.

By the time September rolls around, we will see at least 400 more deaths, let alone the maimed, to have to remember.  Is this what we want for our history or legacy?  I know I do not.

What ever you decide to do this Memorial Day, just give a little thought as to our dead and why they had to die.  Have a safe day and stay well.  Thank you for a forum to let our thought be heard.  hugs to all

Author: BrendaStewart

vet of Navy and USAF,nurse in hemodialysis,acute setting mother of 3