Also available at my house of bile.
I hope everybody enjoyed yesterday’s political theatre in the House of Reprehensibles. To recap:
1) Dennis Kucinich introduces a motion to impeach Lord Vader Vice President Cheney.
2) Steny Hoyer introduces a motion to table the bill, essentially killing it. Hoyer is a gelding Blue Dog, and is afraid of impeaching Cheney. The Democrats begin to vote to table the resolution.
3) At the last minute, the Republicans switch their votes en masse, voting NOT to kill the bill. “You want a debate? Let’s debate!”
4) House leadership promptly freaks out. Hoyer is totally punked. The bill ends up getting sent to the Judiciary, where John Conyers will presumably ignore it.
Follow me below the fold for some conversations with Democratic and Republican representatives’ offices.
I was unfortunately at work and missed the broadcast, but followed the hilarious debacle thanks to Cabin Girl’s comments here at BMT. However, I WAS inspired to call Chaka Fattah’s office. He’s my representative, and a member of the Progressive Caucus, so I wanted to hear how he’d voted.
“Hello, Representative Fattah’s office.”
“Hi. My name is Brendan Skwire. I’m a constituent calling from Philadelphia, and I was wondering how Congressman Fattah voted on Kucinich’s impeachment resolution.”
“Well, the vote’s still going on, so i can’t speak for the Congressman,” said the young woman. “But I’d be happy to pass along a message.”
“I understand it’s going on, but I’m seeing the Democrats trying to kill Kucinich’s bill, and the Republicans are trying to save it. What’s going on? Why are the Republicans open to impeaching Cheney and the Democrats are intent on preventing this from happening?”
“Let me find my notecards,” she replied, giggling a little and flustered. “I’m afraid I don’t know an awful lot about politics.” And then she began to read Fattah’s pre-written rationale for voting to table the bill. So much for not being able to “speak for the Congressman.”
“I don’t know an awful lot about politics.” That’s the new motto for the Democratic Leadership. As Booman put it yesterday, “Pelosi and Hoyer are SO STUPID IT IS INCREDIBLE.”
And in fact Hoyer’s office IS pretty stupid: when I called up to ask why Hoyer was trying to table Kucinich’s bill, the young woman who answered the phone was incredibly rude, telling me “There are more important things we need to do, and impeachment would impede that. If you can’t see that, you’re blind.” I objected to the insult, and deliberately responded with, “Listen honey, don’t condescend to me, you can’t talk to me that way.” The woman was furious, and hissed, “DON’T. CALL. ME. HONEY.”
“OHHHH,” I responded. “I guess you don’t like being disrespected any more than I do! Well, fair is fair: I will retract ‘honey’ if you’ll retract ‘you’re blind’.”
“This conversation is OVER!” she shouted and slammed down the phone. So much for mutual respect. And people say I’m rude. Go figure.
Simultaneously delighted and disgusted by the events of the day, I decided it was time to put in a call to a Republican. Pete Sessions made a bit of funny later that afternoon, saying (paraphrased, can’t find the link) that he was “happy to help the Democrats along if they want to debate”, so he was my man.
“Hello, Pete Sessions office”, said a young man on the other end of the phone.
“Hi, my name’s Brendan Skwire,” I began. “And first of all, I have to tell you that I am about the most left-wing Democrat you could ever meet. If it was up to me, it would be abortion on demand, healthcare for everyone, and out of Iraq yesterday. Pete Sessions and I agree on absolutely nothing, and if we had a few beers together, we’d probably come to blows. So I just wanted to get that out there. I loathe the Republican Party and everything it stands for. No offense, just giving you an idea of where I’m coming from.”
“And none taken,” the guy said graciously. “So. What’s up?”
“Well, as much as I despise the GOP, there is one thing I hate more: the liars and hacks that make up the Democratic Party leadership. I mean, my GOD: they have broken just about every single promise they made to people like me who voted for them in 2006. They took impeachment off the table, they keep sending you guys blank checks for war in Iraq, they let you get away with blocking all sorts of bills… I mean, just look at the Senate! They’re about to confirm Mukasey as Attorney General, a guy who won’t enforce Congressional subpoenas and believes George Bush is above the law. Later this week, they’re probably going to legalize wiretapping our phones. It’s absolutely disgraceful what the Democratic leadership has done. They’re just as bad as you guys!
“And so while I never EVER thought I would say this, please pass a message to Pete Sessions for me: tell him I extend my heartiest congratulations for making Steny Hoyer, a douchebag of the highest order, look even more like the idiot fool he is. And on the House floor! Fantastic!! Tell Mr. Sessions I applaud his participation in this hilarious prank, which exposed my party’s leadership for the clowns and cowards they are.
“Again, I don’t support any of your boss’s policies, but credit where credit is due. That was a job well done. Well-played, sir! I haven’t laughed that hard in months!”
“Will do sir,” the guy said chuckling. “I’m sure Congressman Sessions will be delighted to hear your message!”
It was indeed a day of high comedy in the House. What’s not so funny is the fact that our Democratic Leadership is a bad joke that grows worse every single day. As Digy pointed out at Art of the Hissy Fit
Ritual defamation and humiliation are designed to make the group feel contempt for the victim and over time it’s extremely hard to resist feeling it when the victims fail to stand up for themselves.
She’s right: after betrayal after betrayal after betrayal, I have nothing but contempt for Steny Hoyer and his ilk, who have played such a large role in humiliating the Democratic Party’s base and squandering our strength in the wake of the 2006 elections. With each display of weakness and caviling, with each decision to placate the shrinking Republican minority, Hoyer and the leadership also lose the respect of the base. Who among us can honestly say they are proud of people like Nancy Pelosi, Steny Hoyer, or Harry Reid?
What kind of leaders are these, anyway, who not only fail to lead, but refuse to? What kind of leaders drive extreme partisan like me to side with our opponents, laughing at our Party’s expense?
Failed leaders, that’s what kind. Which kind of suggests that maybe they should be replaced.
