Want to know what’s in the reconciliation bill? Here you go. You’ll probably wonder why anyone would want to “read the bill,” and that was a summary that translates the actual bill into something a normal human might understand if they are an incredible geek. I’d actually like to pass a law requiring teabagging screamers to memorize bills, especially of the several thousand page variety. We’ll probably get to that right after witnesses get to swear in congresspeople and make them swear to tell the truth. Hah.

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