Why are there no openly gay U.S. heroes killing Afghan peasants?! We need to allow all gay women and men, whether openly or non-openly, the opportunity to heroically kill Afghan peasants evilly attempting to oust us from their country. If given a chance to die as an openly gay U.S. heroic Afghan peasant killer, our openly gay U.S. hero would return to a hero’s funeral, where openly and non-openly gay people and non-gay people too could gather to praise the brave service to country provided by an openly gay and now dead American hero.