Last week, Sarah Palin announced a bus tour of America and managed to get her name splashed all across the nation’s headlines…again. But, if the Republicans are despondent about their presidential candidates, Palin’s entrance into the race would do nothing to alleviate that feeling of gloom. Maybe someone ought to ask why the Republicans have no decent candidates. The problem is deeper than the lists of who has and has not decided to run for president. Consider the three names most often mentioned as white-horse rescuers.

First, there’s Jeb Bush, the son who ought to have been heir to his father’s failed presidency. Instead, we got the boy-king and his Rasputin/Palpatine sidekick Dick Cheney. Jeb might have been less of a catastrophe for the country than his older brother turned out to be, but the Bush brand lays in tatters.

Then there is Rep. Paul Ryan. Gifted with Eddie Muntser’s good-looks (along with accompanying widow’s peak), Ryan is the symbol of all that is rotten and unpopular with the modern Republican Party. His budget proposal is so disliked by the public that the GOP just lost a special election in New York’s most conservative district because their candidate had endorsed Ryan’s plan. It’s highly doubtful that Ryan can win reelection to his own district, let alone win statewide in Wisconsin. Nationwide? Not a chance.

And, finally, there is New Jersey Governor Chris Christie who, while doing an admirable job of representing the Garden State’s trademark attitude, is not doing a good job of representing his constituents. After pissing away federal money for education and transportation, New Jersey’s voters give Christie a thirty-eight percent approval rating, are split on whether he’d be a better president than Dubya, and by a 2:1 margin say Christie would be a worse president than Obama.

In other words, the three so-called ‘knights on white horses’ are some of the most unpopular people in politics.

This isn’t new. Republican leaders tend to wear out their welcome quite thoroughly. Remember Gingrich at the end? Remember how Tom DeLay went out? Did people feel sad to see Dennis Hastert or Bill Frist or Trent Lott go? And who can forget the spectacle of half of Washington DC serenading Bush the Younger’s presidential exit with their version of “Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye”?

Even the most popular of all recent Republican politicians, Rudy Guiliani, destroyed the good will he earned by humping 9/11 until it hurt.

The problem isn’t personalities. It’s results. When given a chance, the Republicans cannot govern effectively. To listen to their rhetoric, they don’t believe effective governance is possible, and it’s certainly not preferred. The Republican candidates are not unpopular and uninspiring because of their policy differences. They basically have no policy differences of any consequence. They represent the hive-mind. And their busy bees don’t serve the country or the truth, but their little band of religious fundamentalists and tax-averse businessmen.

They’re not popular because their beliefs are not popular. And their message of doom is uninspiring.

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