Why is it that every time Mitt Romney or a member of his family tries to tell a personal anecdote it’s always a freaking disaster. The unflappable Mitt knew exactly what to do when the family dog strapped on the roof of his car lost his bowels all over the back window. The fun-loving Mitt tripped his daughter-in-law rather than lose a race to her. And this latest one is just unbelievable. Let’s reconstruct it.

It’s either Christmastime 2009 or 2010, Mitt can’t remember which. Someone sticks a flier in the Romney family mailbox down in San Diego. It’s an invitation to a neighborhood Christmas Party. The Romneys read the flier but they had no intention of attending the party until they noticed a gathering of people practically across the street. “Well, now, if it’s not such a long walk, why don’t we pop in after all, Ann?”

So, off the Romneys go to attend the neighborhood Christmas Party. They show up, but it turns out that it isn’t the neighborhood Christmas Party and they haven’t been invited.

“Turns out, this wasn’t the neighborhood party. This was a family having a party with their friends,” Romney said as his audience laughed. “We were a little embarrassed but they treated us well nonetheless and I got to meet some really interesting people.”

Who knows how long it took them to figure out that they were party-crashers? At least they probably didn’t drink their beer.

So, what did Romney do while he was at this party? Apparently, he walked around introducing himself to everyone three or four times, as if once would not have sufficed. Here’s how the friend of one guest told the story.

“He said it was very comical,” [Glen Doherty friend Elf] Ellefsen said, “Mitt Romney approached him ultimately four times, using this private gathering as a political venture to further his image. He kept introducing himself as Mitt Romney, a political figure. The same introduction, the same opening line. Glen believed it to be very insincere and stale.” […]

“He said it was pathetic and comical to have the same person come up to you within only a half hour, have this person reintroduce himself to you, having absolutely no idea whatsoever that he just did this 20 minutes ago, and did not even recognize Glen’s face.”

Maybe Romney was drinking their beer.

Of course, the only reason any of this came up is because Glen Doherty is one of the four Americans who died recently in Benghazi, Libya. Mitt Romney realized that he had met this man at the Christmas Party and decided to talk about how shaken he was to learn of his death. Mr. Doherty’s mother isn’t impressed:

“I don’t trust Romney. He shouldn’t make my son’s death part of his political agenda. It’s wrong to use these brave young men, who wanted freedom for all, to degrade Obama,” said Barbara Doherty, Glen’s mother.

It not clear how Romney could remember that he’d met Mr. Doherty two or three years ago when, on the night of their meeting, he couldn’t remember meeting him twenty minutes later, or twenty minutes after that, or twenty minutes after that.

This is not a normal person. A normal person doesn’t strap his dog to the top of his car and hit the interstate. A normal person doesn’t insult people’s raincoats and turn up their nose at their cookies. A normal person doesn’t dress in a police officer’s uniform and impersonate a cop. A normal person doesn’t crash his neighbor’s Christmas party and introduce himself to everyone four times before realizing he wasn’t invited.

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