Will you watch the President’s State of the Union address? I confess, I will not.

Granted, that means I may miss out on some seamy, scandalous or absurd moments of political entertainment, such as the instance when a dimwitted Republican Congressman a few years ago bellowed “You Lie!” at President Obama, but that’s what YouTube is for. If I want to catch the improvisational comedy inherent in any speech by any President to a room full of people, roughly half of whom will applaud him if he sneezes, while the other half sits stony faced, hoping their PR flacks come up with a good sound bite for the after speech spin room, I can always search the innertubes and fast forward to the bits that interest me, if any.

Unfortunately, most State of the Union speeches are full of platitudes, obscure warnings about the opposing party, calls for “unity” and vague promises to take action when in truth we all know that no action will likely be taken unless the party to which the President belongs controls a large majority in the House and at least 60 senate seats. And even then, nothing is assured. Public Option, anyone?

On the other hand, I am tempted to watch the Rand Paul response to President Obama’s speech (but not the Rubio one) because, like most people, I can’t turn my eyes away from a train wreck. Still, I expect to resist that temptation, too. After all, there’s only so much of Rand Paul’s whiny voice one can endure, and that is doubly so when there is no one present to interrupt his inane diatribes.

But if, unlike me, you see value in viewing tonight’s State of the Union speech in real time, please, do not hesitate to give me your reasons why my attitude about this American modified version of kabuki theater needs adjustment.