It sounds like I need to start dissing my kid with more frequency. Did you diss your kids?
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BooMan
Martin Longman a contributing editor at the Washington Monthly. He is also the founder of Booman Tribune and Progress Pond. He has a degree in philosophy from Western Michigan University.
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For once, I’m way ahead of the parenting curve here.
OTOH, my kids are already sarcastic and snarky as hell.
I never diss my kid, but I also don’t act like these parents.
I do, however, praise him when he’s accomplished something, discipline him when he’s wrong, and generally make sure he behaves like a decent human being to others.
It sounds harsh, but I told each of my three sons that they were smart kids, but in life they would find that wherever they went, there would always be someone smarter and someone who wasn’t as smart as they were. It was important that they be respectful of both.
Did I “spoil” them when I raised them? My husband and I raised them to be honest, decent, and thoughtful human beings. None of them seem to be narcissists at this point. They’re 27, 25, and 22. Hopefully they won’t turn into self-centered creeps! Or Republicans!
No need, that’s his sister’s job. Actually, I’m not perfect on this score, especially since they adolesced, but they do it right back and it’s a whole-family thing. And they’ve got great manners outside. Better to diss your own, in any case, than follow today’s David Brooks column and focus on dissing other people’s kids as a method of repairing the world.
It’s not about dissing them. Think about it from their perspective. If love always gets expressed through their being “special”, they naturally come to believe they have to be special to be loved, instead of just being themselves. Along with this goes all the neurotic demands for a world that treats them as special, which is annoying in others but actually represents emotional crippling.
Basically all that study tells you is that narcissists raise narcissists. Not earth-shaking.
Nothing to do with treating your kid as any decent human being would.
Classic over interpretation of data.
If you believe the PNAS study (not sure I do) the most you can say is that if you tell people (children) that they are exceptional enough times, they will start to believe it.
Did you diss your kids? I prefer a belt or switch !
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