I originally wrote this as a reply to Booman’s post Why Kneecapping Trump Won’t Work. I asked…
“How about skullcapping?”
Really. This one is truly strange. Middle America won’t like it. Brilliant satire, and with the added value that it appears to be true!!!
Read on:
Is Donald Trump’s Hair a $60,000 Weave? A Gawker Investigation
Presumptive GOP presidential nominee Donald Trump has generated an unceasing torrent of press attention that some estimate to be worth roughly $2 billion. Yet the central mystery at the very core of his persona–his inscrutable hairdo–has somehow, impossibly, remained unsolved. Until, perhaps, now.
A tipster who claimed knowledge of Trump’s hair recently came to Gawker with a potential solution to the enigma: Trump’s hair is not his own, costs tens of thousands of dollars for installation and upkeep, and comes from a man as mysterious as Trump is bombastic.
This solution that Trump, our tipster says, sought for his hair woes is a little-known, patented hair restoration treatment called a “microcylinder intervention.” It’s only performed by one clinic that we know of–Ivari International–where our source once sought treatment, and where he says he learned of Trump’s apparent patronage. What’s more, Ivari’s New York location was inside Trump Tower–on the private floor reserved for Donald Trump’s own office.
—snip—
It goes on. Worth reading in its entirety for the sheer strangeness of it. A thoroughly researched piece about sheer, self-loving idiocy. I laughed my ass off. This kind of mockery will work, I think. It s kinda like that thing with John Edwards preening in front of a mirror while the soundtrack plays “I Feel Pretty.”
That was the true beginning of the end for John Boy.
Real ‘Muricans like the Trump followers ain’t gonna elect no dude who goes this far…and this expensive…to end up looking like a latter day Gorgeous George. (Start watching at about 1:03 in.)
It just ain’t…manly…if y’know what I mean.
Delightful.
I said a year ago regarding Trump that you cannot laugh a clown offstage.
Maybe I was wrong. If the clown appears to take himself too seriously? Maybe I was wrong.
Kudos to Ms. Feinberg. Brilliant…and hurtful…comedy.
Later…
AG
