Ah, cocaine in the White House! It makes me so nostalgic for my 1970’s childhood when a whole life stood before me and everything seemed possible. Back then, it wasn’t so out of the ordinary for the Carter administration’s chief adviser on health and drug abuse Dr. Peter G. Bourne to mosey across town to a party hosted by the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML) and openly snort lines in front friend and stranger alike: “There was a mound of it (cocaine) about the size of a large prune being passed around on a glass with a razor blade inside it,” the witness said.

When the glass was passed to Bourne he used the blade to drawn out a small portion of the drug into a line and inhaled through the rolled dollar bill, the witness said.

Bourne was wearing a suit at the time and talked with many of the others in the party crowd of middle class students and professionals in their 20s and 30s, according to the source. At another point during the party, outside the bedroom, the person saw Bourne smoke from a marijuana cigarette and pass it on.

Then there was the incident that may not have been an incident at all where Donald Trump and Sen. Joseph McCarthy’s favorite lawyer, Roy Cohn, spurred a Special Prosecutor investigation of Carter’s chief of staff Hamilton Jordan and his press secretary Jody Powell. Hamilton was accused of using cocaine at the famous Studio 54 discotheque in New York City while Powell watched on.

…the accusations didn’t exactly come out of nowhere: at the time, two of Studio 54’s owners were themselves in trouble, for tax evasion, obstruction of justice and conspiracy charges, and one of them had hired notorious lawyer Roy M. Cohn. Cohn heard that Jordan and Powell had visited the club, so he taped a statement from the dealer alleged to have provided the drugs and brought the tape to the FBI. Although the disco owners didn’t deny that they had ulterior motives — Steve Rubell, Cohn’s client, said he would testify against Jordan and Powell only in exchange for immunity for himself — the weight of the accusation meant that it could lead to, as TIME put it, “a major political crisis.” Hamilton Jordan was a powerful figure in politics, as well as, as People noted at the time, someone with “a reputation as a partygoer.”

In the end, the grand jury voted unanimously against indicting Jordan. Something similar happened with Carter’s 1980 campaign manager, Tim Kraft, although before charges of cocaine use were dropped, he had to step down.

Prosecutor Gerald J. Gallinghouse of New Orleans informed U.S. District Court Judge Barrington D. Parker here that “the cumulative and credible evidence developed and presented” during FBI investigations “was not sufficient to overcome the legal presumption of innocence of criminal wrongdoing and to establish probable cause for any criminal charge against him.”

In his first year in office, Carter endorsed the decriminalization of marijuana, at least on the federal level, so he was sending out a message a bit different from President Richard Nixon’s war on drugs. But we never saw something like what’s in the news today.

Officials found cocaine on the ground floor of the White House on Sunday near where visitors taking tours of the West Wing are instructed to leave their cellphones, according to three people familiar with the investigation.

The Secret Service is investigating how cocaine ended up in the White House, after the discovery of the substance prompted a brief evacuation. A preliminary test indicated it was cocaine, and a final test has now also concluded the material was cocaine.

Authorities are trying to find the person who left it at the White House.

My first thought on hearing about this was that it probably was stashed somewhere by Donald Trump Jr. and his girlfriend Kimberly Guilfoyle. Then I thought it could be Hunter Biden’s coke or that he’d least be blamed for it. But now that I know where they found it, it was probably just someone taking a White House tour who suddenly realized they’d carried some serious contraband into a place they definitely shouldn’t have, and they just did the equivalent of shoving an eight-ball into a police patrol car’s rear seat cushions.

It might not have been such a big issue if the Secret Service didn’t have to worry it was anthrax or something and evacuate the premises.

If you want to feel nostalgic, watch this British report on Studio 54 from 1978.

As a public service announcement, cocaine is a stupid and addictive drug that turns you into an asshole. You should never use it.