“Are there any questions…? Yes you there in the back…”
“Yes, sir… Dave Rodgers of the Times…”
“Excellent, super…! And how many children do you have there, Roger Dodger… heh. heh…”
“Well, actually sir, I’m single and…”
“Excellent, super…! And I know you and your wife must be very… proud of them… What’s your question there Roge… shoot… heh, heh… oops, did I say that? Heh, heh, I meant figguratively, not librully… go ahead Roger…”
“It’s Dave, actually… But I was just wondering if you could clear up once and for all to the American Public that issue about the lump in your back, which was so controversial during the presidential election debates…”
“Are you sure that’s the question you’re supposed to ask?”
“Well, it is a press conference, and…”
“Don’t you want to ask about Social Security…?”
“Nope.”
“Iraq…?”
“Nope.”
“Energy…?”
“Nope.”
“Gasoline prices…?”
“Nope.”
“Heh, heh… no, I can handle this one, Karl… Well, Roger, ya got me! It is a communication device… given to me by Prince Bandar… you want to see it? I think Amurica has the right to know that her leader is packin’…. Whoa, now! All of you sit yer asses right back down… I’ve spent sixty days on the road working hard, and asking everybody nicely for your money, and I guess it’s come to this… Just as sure as I got my finger on the “Great Communicator” here, I got my other fingers on some nookular buttons, and you’d all best just think about that… Any more questions…what was your name again?”
“Roger, sir”
“Wilco… heh, heh… we used to say that in my fighter jock days… heh, heh, heh!”