Who else but Our Dear Leader, Commander-in-Codpiece himself, could twist the English language past the point of no return. What is that you say? He’s already done this numerous times? True, but today was a special instance demonstrating that we really do live in Orwellian times. Here’s a snippet of his speech to the Conservative Political Action Committee today. See if you can spot the 1984 references:
Our views are grounded in timeless truths. During these debates we stuck to timeless truths. We believe that the most reliable guide for our country is the collective wisdom of ordinary citizens. (Applause.) We believe our culture benefits from a diversity of faith, a respect for values, and the guidance of a higher power. (Applause.) We believe in personal responsibility. (Applause.) We believe in the universality of freedom. We believe our nation has the right to defend itself — even if sometimes others disagree. (Applause.) And we believe America remains a force of good in our world. (Applause.) […]
America, 25 NATO allies and 15 partner nations are helping the Afghan people secure their country. The Taliban, al Qaeda, and their allies are on the run. Afghanistan has a long road ahead, but they have a future that offers promise and hope. We’re going to stand with the Afghan people, we’re going to help millions claim their liberty — and we will always work to make sure Afghanistan will never again be a safe haven for terrorists and extremists who want to do us harm. (Applause.)
The war against our enemies also brought us to Iraq. […]
Because we acted, 25 million Iraqis are free. We’ve seen them go to the polls. We’ve seen them elect a representative government. We’ve also seen an enemy determined to roll back this progress through horrific acts of violence designed to pit Iraqis one against another. […]
… Listen, the stakes in November are high. This is an important election. Prosperity and peace are in the balance. […]
Yes, you heard that right. The President of torture, of illegal wars, of the failures to provide relief to the victims of Katrina, of the “unitary executive, of “signing statements” that make it clear he won’t enforce the laws as written, the President who presided over death and destruction on an unprecedented scale, and of an economy where the national debt has more than doubled under his reign, and where more people live in poverty and without any health insurance, or with grossly inadequate health insurance, the man who brought us no-bid contracts and Halliburton rapists, the President who gave us Blackwater mercenaries shooting up Baghdad streets for the fun of it, the President of $100 a barrel oil and $3+ gasoline and mega profits for Exxon Mobil beyond their executives’ wildest dreams, the man who fought against any action to ameliorate global warming and censored the speech of government scientists for political gain, the leader of the most corrupt administration and the most corrupt political party in our history, and the President who sat reading “My Pet Goat” for seven long minutes because he couldn’t bother himself to pay attention to his own intelligence agencies when they told him Al Qaida was determined to attack America, this is the man who claims that Democrats threaten the peace and security of our country should America fail to elect a Republican for President in November?
Thank god impeachment is off the table, eh?
