Author: Brendan Skwire

Tom T. Hall, “I Like Beer”

A little video for the holiday weekend and one of my personal anthems.  I’m sure you’ll be a fan too.

Today I’m going to write about conserving yeast. It’s an easy trick many of you probably already know, but worth repeating, since it can save you about $30.00 or so spread out over 4 batches of beer.
So let’s face it: when you add up the costs of homebrewing, you’re really not saving THAt much money.  Your average batch of extract/grain beer is going to cost about $25.00 for malt syrup, $10.00 for hops (reflecting increased prices), about $5.00 for a few pounds of grains for steeping, and $8.00 for the yeast. So about $50.00 for 2.5 cases of beer (five gallons).

If you have a particular style you like to make often, and you use liquid yeast (I like wyeast brand), it’s entirely feasible to use the yeast at least four times. Some say you can use it even more than that, but I’ve heard you risk off-flavors at some point, and I’m not about to risk a bad batch.  If anyone in comments can clarify, please do so!

The way to do it is VERY easy.  When you transfer your beer from the primary to the secondary, a good quantity of sandy brown sludge remains behind.  This sludge is filled with still viable yeast.  Take a sanitized bottle of some kind (we use a 1 quart antique milk bottle), pour a bunch of that slop right in, stick in an airlock and cork (sanitized of course, but you know that), and put it in the fridge.  Overnight, the beer, yeast, and other dregs will separate  like a pousse cafe, with the yeast forming a light tan layer between the beer and the nasty stuff.

The yeast will be good for about a week.  When you start your brew, take the bottle out of the fridge so the yeast has some time to wake up: those cold temperatures knock them out.  Before you pitch, pour off that thin layer of beer, and dump the yeast into the primary fermenter.  Try to leave as much of the chunky stuff behind: it’s made of proteins, hot break, and other dregs that can provide off-flavors.  Luckily, this stuff tends to cling to the inside of the bottle anyway, so it’s not that hard to accomplish. And if a little gets in, Relax, have a home brew!  A little won’t really hurt anything.

We bought the ingredients for a porter today, and will be using the leftover yeast from last week’s brown ale.

1/2# US Victory Malt, 25Lovibond (adding the same nutty flavor that the brown will feature)
1/2# crystal malt, 30-45L (a must for any british ale, IMO)
1/2# chocolate malt
1/2# black patent malt, which is even darker and roastier than the chocolate
6.6 pounds Light Malt extract
1 ounce Target (UK) hops, 10%, 60 minutes
1 tsp Irish moss, 15 minutes
1 ounce Fuggles hops, 4% 5 minutes
Wyeast 1187 Ringwood Ale

Steep the grains in 160-165 degree water for a half hour, then stir in extract.  When the wort comes to a rolling boil, set your timer for an hour and pour in the Target hops.  At fifteen minutes, add your irish moss, and at 5 minutes add the Fuggles.  Or would that be Fuggleses?  

Cool rapidly with a wort chiller or ice bath, and add to the primary fermenter.  Within a week (give or take a few days) this ale should be ready to bottle or keg.

It’s winter and you KNOW you’re craving those porters, which are best served just below room temperature.  Mine’s a little basic: gimme some ideas to make this porter something special, and share your recipes below!

Since I can’t seem to dedicate one particular day to home brew blogging, I think a better standing title is “Weekend Homebrew Blogging”.  Hope y’all like that.

Last night, the girlfriend and I went to her employer’s annual Christmas Party, at their home in Princeton. The hubby’s a writer and an art collecter, the wife is an architect and preservationist, so it was just a lovely evening.  The girlfriend’s gift to her employer was a 6-pack of our two holiday beers: Happy Birthday Jeebus strong ale and Happy Harmonica spiced ale.  Both had been in the bottle for about 2.5 weeks, and neither of us had sampled the finished beer.
I’m happy to report that both were delicious.  The Jeebus could have used another week to achieve full-carbonation, so it went down more like a brown ale or a porter, but it’s clearly well on its way.  It’s got a touch of diacetyl, a usually unwanted ester that provides a bit of a butterscotch aftertaste.  However, a little in a brown ale adds a wonderful richness, and this was no exception.

The spiced ale was an even better surprise. During the period when the wort was in the primary fermenter, the ambient temperature dropped to the low 40s, so in an effort to keep the temperature closer to the more optimal 60s, I put a space heater nearby. Too nearby as it turned out, because in the morning the bucket was warm to the touch: primary fermentation stopped soon thereafter, and I was convinced we’d have a very low alcohol brew. For the girlfriend’s part, when we sampled the green beer before bottling, she was concerned we hadn’t added enough spice (cinnamon, a little cloves, orange peel).  To our delight, the beer was as rich and flavorful as gingerbread, a smashing success. The carbonation level was perfect, as was the alcohol level.  If left for a month or two to condition, that stuff is going to be awesome.

So: with winter coming on, the keg getting low, and hops in short supply and at high prices, we’re looking toward brown ales, stouts, and porters for the next batch.  Maybe even a barleywine at some point.  Whatever it is, I love a good dark beer during the winter months.  There’s something warming and comforting in a pint of porter or stout, a quality you’re just not going to get in an IPA (and why would you, anyhow).  I think of tweed and fireplaces, old English pubs lit with gaslights, all that happy crappy.

One of the nicest things about all of these styles is they don’t necessarily need secondary fermentation, and if you keg, that means you can be drinking fresh beer within a week to ten days.

George at Home Sweet Homebrew, my supplier suggested Ringwood Ale yeast for this one.  We’re also using a malt style I’ve never used before.  Share your winter warmers in the comments below!

Reminder: all my recipes are extract/grain hybrids. Assume that the fermenter is already holding 2.5 gallons of cooled, boiled water. YMMV if you do all grain.

Brown Ale #1

1/2# US Victory Malt, 25Lovibond (this has a really nice nutty flavor)
1/2# crystal malt, 30-45L.
4 ounces chocolate malt
6.6 pounds Light Malt extract
2 ounces W.G.V Goldings hops, 5%, @ 60minutes
1 tsp Irish moss, 15 minutes
1 ounce Admiral hops, 12% 5minutes
Wyeast 1187 Ringwood Ale

Steep the grains in 160-165 degree water for a half hour, then stir in extract.  When the wort comes to a rolling boil, set your timer for an hour and pour in the WGV Goldings.  At fifteen minutes, add your irish moss, and at 5 minutes add the Admirals.  

Cool rapidly with a wort chiller or ice bath, and add to the primary fermenter.  Within a week (give or take a few days) this ale should be ready to bottle or keg.  

What’re YOU drinking?

We finally got around to bottling our Christmas brews last night, and I have one thing to say about the experience: THANK GOD FOR KEGS!

Bottling was something of a trip back in time, and a strong reminder about why we switched to kegs to begin with.  Number one (and most importantly) you don’t have to wait 3 extra weeks to enjoy your beer.  Number 2, you use MUCH smaller amounts of toxic chemicals.  Number 3, kegging generates SO much less mess.

Overall however, the bottling procedure went more smoothly than we’d expected.  And in the end, not only were we able to cover all our gift-recipients, we had quite a few bottles left over (and maybe even a couple for Mr. Booman).  Huzzah!

On the other hand, all this bottling has left me kind of at a loss for an extended entry.  It’s the first paycheck of the month, which means time to pay the bills.  I won’t be buying more brewing supplies for another two weeks.

I’ve never made a lager, a gruit, or any variety of mead.  With the mercury dropping, I’m leaning toward trying my hand at a lager, which needs to ferment at significantly lower temperature than ale.

What’re you experimenting with this weekend?

I was on the road returning my son to his mom yesterday, so please pardon this belated beer blog. But on to happier occasions.

I am delighted to report that the Thanksgiving ale I mentioned last week turned out to be closer to a barleywine, with a lovely alcoholic warmth at the back of the mouth and roasty-toasty-licious at the front, thanks to all that chocolate malt.  It only takes one of these beers to send you on your way.

And yet, sometimes that’s exactly the opposite of what you want in a beer. Don’t get me wrong: i love barleywines and other big beers just as much as anybody else, but when it comes to session beers, these high alcohol bell-ringers can be a little much.  If I had my druthers,  my Thanksgiving ale would have been a little lighter on the alcohol content.  

Per Beer Advocate (linked above)

Any beer that contains no higher than 5 percent ABV, featuring a balance between malt and hop characters (ingredients) and, typically, a clean finish – a combination of which creates a beer with high drinkability. The purpose of a session beer is to allow a beer drinker to have multiple beers, within a reasonable time period or session, without overwhelming the senses or reaching inappropriate levels of intoxication. (Yes, you can drink and enjoy beer without getting drunk.)

I love a good session beer, whether it’s a pale ale, an ESB, or a lager.  But my favorite session beers are brown ales. Easy to make, easy to drink, and in this period of high-priced and scarce hops, easy on the wallet for homebrewers.  Brown ales tend to be maltier than other ales, and even though their alcohol by volume (ABV) is relatively low, they’re very warming, great during the winter months.

I was just digging through my book of recipes (aka, that pile of paper in the kitchen) and I can’t find my brown ale recipes, so I’ll just offer this off the top of my head. Again, this 5-gallon recipe assumes you boiled and cooled 3 gallons of water the night before, and assumes that lie me you’re using extracts and whole grains. Share some of your favorite brown ales (and other session beers) in comments!

3/4 pound cracked crystal malt (60 degrees L)
1/2 pound cracked chocolate malt (or similar)
3.3 pounds Amber malt extract
3.3 pounds dark malt extract
2 ounces Fuggles, Styrian, or Kent Golding Hops, 1 hour
1 tsp Irish malt (15 minutes)
Wyeast #1028, 1098, or any of the British/English strains. It’s hard to go wrong.

Steep your cracked grains for half an hour in 3 gallons of 160 degree water.  After a 1/2 hour, stir in your extracts and bring to a boil.  

When the water reaches a rolling boil, set your timer to one hour and add all of the hops.  Brown ales tend not to have that much in the way of aroma hops, but if you want some aroma, maybe buy an extra ounce and throw it in at the same time you throw in the Irish moss. “Relax,! Have a homebrew,” as Papazian would say. Which, by the way, you should do at the 15 minute mark.

Cool the wort rapidly, then pitch the yeast into the fermenter. Pour the cooled wort in, splashing vigorously to aerate, seal, and jam in the airlock.

Brown ales ferment quickly and there’s often no need for secondary fermentation.  The beer should be ready to bottle or keg within a week and a couple of days.  Enjoy!

After participating in a couple of beer blogs at Balloon Juice and Big Orange Satan, I figured I’d try my hand here at BMT.  After all, I like beer almost as much as I like breathing, and I brew so much of the stuff, it seemed like a no-brainer, and a welcome respite from politics and outrage.

So on my inaugural beer-blog, I ask you: what’re we gonna do about the hops, and how is the shortage going to play out for drinkers AND homebrewers?
As the linked article indicates, there will be a major hop shortage for the next three years, due to a whole bunch of factors: massive surpluses in the 1990s were frozen, bringing the price so low that farmer’s stopped planting them; unpredictable weather wiped out crops in the Pacific Northwest and Europe; and finally, newly planted hops take up to three years to produce anything of substance.

Some of the newer craft brews have gone beyond hop love into hop fetish: brews like Victory Hop Devil, Dogfish Head’s 60-minute and 120 minute IPAs, Troeg’s Nugget Nectar have ridiculously large (and delicious) amounts of hops, a trend that probably won’t continue much longer given the shortage.  

My prediction?  Don’t look for much change in Budweiser and its Big Brewing peers.  Among the craft brewers, get ready for lots of brown ales and scotch ales, which require far less intense hopping.  This isn’t necessarily a bad thing:  brown ales and their relatives, with average 4% or lower alcohol content, make excellent session brews, since it takes more than one to put you flat on your back.  Craftier brewers like Dogfish Head may well experiment with gruits, meads, and other not-beers: they’re already edging in that direction with their Midas Touch Golden Elixer.  The big question is whether the majority of the customer base feels the same way I do about browns, and whether they’ll be willing to embrace experimentation.

I’ve made changes in my homebrewing calendar (which exists largely in my head): more browns and milds please.  

And just in time for holidays, here’s a recipe we came up for a strong brown ale.  This brew is for 5 gallons, and assumes that 1/2 the water is cooled and in the fermenter.  Tell me what you’re drinking and brewing in comments!

Bill:
1/2 pound crystal cracked malt (60 degrees L)
1/2 pound melanoidin cracked malt (30 degrees L)
4 oz chocolate malt
6.6 pounds Amber extract
3.3 pounds dark extract
2oz fuggles hops, 60 minutes
1 oz Mt. Rainier hops, 30 minutes
1 tsp Irish Moss (clarifier), 15 minutes
1 0z Mt. Rainier hops, 15 minutes.
WYeast 1338 European ale, activated at least 12 hours before brewing.

Steep the cracked malt for a half hour in 3 gallons of 165 degree water.  Thoroughly dissolve the extracts in the water and bring to a boil.  When the water comes to a full boil, stir in the 2 ounce of fuggles and set your timer to 60 minutes.  Add the rest of the hops/irish moss according to the bill.

As the brew (also known as wort) boils, add the yeast to the pre-cooled water and shake vigorously to aerate and mix.

When the hour is up, you’ll need to quickly cool your brew to about 70 degrees or less.  A wort chiller is very handy and easy to make, but an ice water bath also works.  Pour the cooled wort into the fermenter, seal, and insert the airlock.  ferment at about 65 degrees or more for one week, then transfer to the secondary fermenter. ferment another 2 weeks, then bottle or keg.
Enjoy!  Homebrew!

Also available at my house of bile.

I hope everybody enjoyed yesterday’s political theatre in the House of Reprehensibles. To recap:

1) Dennis Kucinich introduces a motion to impeach Lord Vader Vice President Cheney.

2) Steny Hoyer introduces a motion to table the bill, essentially killing it. Hoyer is a gelding Blue Dog, and is afraid of impeaching Cheney. The Democrats begin to vote to table the resolution.

3) At the last minute, the Republicans switch their votes en masse, voting NOT to kill the bill. “You want a debate? Let’s debate!”

4) House leadership promptly freaks out. Hoyer is totally punked. The bill ends up getting sent to the Judiciary, where John Conyers will presumably ignore it.

Follow me below the fold for some conversations with Democratic and Republican representatives’ offices.
I was unfortunately at work and missed the broadcast, but followed the hilarious debacle thanks to Cabin Girl’s comments here at BMT. However, I WAS inspired to call Chaka Fattah’s office. He’s my representative, and a member of the Progressive Caucus, so I wanted to hear how he’d voted.

“Hello, Representative Fattah’s office.”

“Hi. My name is Brendan Skwire. I’m a constituent calling from Philadelphia, and I was wondering how Congressman Fattah voted on Kucinich’s impeachment resolution.”

“Well, the vote’s still going on, so i can’t speak for the Congressman,” said the young woman. “But I’d be happy to pass along a message.”

“I understand it’s going on, but I’m seeing the Democrats trying to kill Kucinich’s bill, and the Republicans are trying to save it. What’s going on? Why are the Republicans open to impeaching Cheney and the Democrats are intent on preventing this from happening?”

“Let me find my notecards,” she replied, giggling a little and flustered. “I’m afraid I don’t know an awful lot about politics.” And then she began to read Fattah’s pre-written rationale for voting to table the bill. So much for not being able to “speak for the Congressman.”

“I don’t know an awful lot about politics.” That’s the new motto for the Democratic Leadership. As Booman put it yesterday, “Pelosi and Hoyer are SO STUPID IT IS INCREDIBLE.”

And in fact Hoyer’s office IS pretty stupid: when I called up to ask why Hoyer was trying to table Kucinich’s bill, the young woman who answered the phone was incredibly rude, telling me “There are more important things we need to do, and impeachment would impede that. If you can’t see that, you’re blind.” I objected to the insult, and deliberately responded with, “Listen honey, don’t condescend to me, you can’t talk to me that way.” The woman was furious, and hissed, “DON’T. CALL. ME. HONEY.”

“OHHHH,” I responded. “I guess you don’t like being disrespected any more than I do! Well, fair is fair: I will retract ‘honey’ if you’ll retract ‘you’re blind’.”

“This conversation is OVER!” she shouted and slammed down the phone. So much for mutual respect. And people say I’m rude. Go figure.

Simultaneously delighted and disgusted by the events of the day, I decided it was time to put in a call to a Republican. Pete Sessions made a bit of funny later that afternoon, saying (paraphrased, can’t find the link) that he was “happy to help the Democrats along if they want to debate”, so he was my man.

“Hello, Pete Sessions office”, said a young man on the other end of the phone.

“Hi, my name’s Brendan Skwire,” I began. “And first of all, I have to tell you that I am about the most left-wing Democrat you could ever meet. If it was up to me, it would be abortion on demand, healthcare for everyone, and out of Iraq yesterday. Pete Sessions and I agree on absolutely nothing, and if we had a few beers together, we’d probably come to blows. So I just wanted to get that out there. I loathe the Republican Party and everything it stands for. No offense, just giving you an idea of where I’m coming from.”

“And none taken,” the guy said graciously. “So. What’s up?”

“Well, as much as I despise the GOP, there is one thing I hate more: the liars and hacks that make up the Democratic Party leadership. I mean, my GOD: they have broken just about every single promise they made to people like me who voted for them in 2006. They took impeachment off the table, they keep sending you guys blank checks for war in Iraq, they let you get away with blocking all sorts of bills… I mean, just look at the Senate! They’re about to confirm Mukasey as Attorney General, a guy who won’t enforce Congressional subpoenas and believes George Bush is above the law. Later this week, they’re probably going to legalize wiretapping our phones. It’s absolutely disgraceful what the Democratic leadership has done. They’re just as bad as you guys!

“And so while I never EVER thought I would say this, please pass a message to Pete Sessions for me: tell him I extend my heartiest congratulations for making Steny Hoyer, a douchebag of the highest order, look even more like the idiot fool he is. And on the House floor! Fantastic!! Tell Mr. Sessions I applaud his participation in this hilarious prank, which exposed my party’s leadership for the clowns and cowards they are.

“Again, I don’t support any of your boss’s policies, but credit where credit is due. That was a job well done. Well-played, sir! I haven’t laughed that hard in months!”

“Will do sir,” the guy said chuckling. “I’m sure Congressman Sessions will be delighted to hear your message!”

It was indeed a day of high comedy in the House. What’s not so funny is the fact that our Democratic Leadership is a bad joke that grows worse every single day. As Digy pointed out at Art of the Hissy Fit

Ritual defamation and humiliation are designed to make the group feel contempt for the victim and over time it’s extremely hard to resist feeling it when the victims fail to stand up for themselves.

She’s right: after betrayal after betrayal after betrayal, I have nothing but contempt for Steny Hoyer and his ilk, who have played such a large role in humiliating the Democratic Party’s base and squandering our strength in the wake of the 2006 elections. With each display of weakness and caviling, with each decision to placate the shrinking Republican minority, Hoyer and the leadership also lose the respect of the base. Who among us can honestly say they are proud of people like Nancy Pelosi, Steny Hoyer, or Harry Reid?

What kind of leaders are these, anyway, who not only fail to lead, but refuse to? What kind of leaders drive extreme partisan like me to side with our opponents, laughing at our Party’s expense?

Failed leaders, that’s what kind. Which kind of suggests that maybe they should be replaced.

Cross posted at Brendan Calling

Ring. Riiiiiiing.

“Hello, Senator Rockefeller’s office.”

“Hi there, my name’s Brendan Skwire, and I need some help from the Senator.

“It seems I’ve broken a few laws, and I’m looking at a felony conviction.
The judge has pretty much rejected my arguments of innocence, so I was wondering how much it will cost me to get Senator Rockefeller to write an ex post facto bill giving me immunity from my crimes. I don’t have as much money as AT&T, but since Senator Rockefeller’s selling indulgences, I was wondering how much it’ll cost me. Can you give me some idea?”

“Sir, if you’d just look at Senator Rockefeller’s website, he explai–”

“Oh yeah, I’ve been to his website. And I’ve also been reading about how the Senator didn’t get any donations to speak of from AT&T until 2006-2007, when it spiked by nearly $20,000, so I’ve been wondering how much will it cost me to buy Senator Rockefeller?”

“Sir, I’ll pass your message along.”

“Thanks. Hey, why’s he doing this anyway? He’s independently wealthy, and doesn’t need the $25,000 or whatever.”

“Sir–”

“And what gives him the right to sell of my Fourth Amendment rights? Those rights aren’t his to sell, and they’re worth a hell of a lot more than a measley $25,000. You might even say they’re priceless.”

“I’ll pass your message along.” -Click-

Jay Rockefeller deserves to burn in Hell for his shameful sell-out. The man is no better than Quisling or Petain. Tom Paine, Ben Franklin, and the rest of the Founding Fathers are spinning in their graves right now.

Cross-posted at Brendan calling

CQ: Surveillance Bill Will Go to Senate Floor Next Month

Tim Starks of Congressional Quarterly reports that Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) plans to bring the Senate’s surveillance bill up for floor debate in mid-November. That’s despite the hold that Sen. Chris Dodd (D-CT) plans to place on the measure — something first reported by Election Central’s Greg Sargent.

The Senate intelligence committee is still marking up the bill behind closed doors, according to staffers. A joint statement from committee leaders Jay Rockefeller (D-WV) and Kit Bond (R-MO) will follow when the mark-up concludes, but that may not occur today.

“Hello, Senator Harry Reid’s office,” said the young woman on the other end. [more…]
It was strange she was working there so late: it was at least 6:15 PM. I identified myself and told the young woman in no uncertain terms that Harry Reid needs to back off.

“I am one of thousands of Americans who called Senator Dodd to urge him to do this,” I said. “This bill is an egregious violation of Americans’ civil and Fourth Amendment rights, and Harry Reid is on the wrong side of history right now.

“Why is he trying to undermine a fellow Democrat anyway? I mean, it’s no secret that the bill’s author Jay Rockefeller is a huge beneficiary of AT&T’s largesse, but why should Americans have their rights taken from them because the Senator’s friends are in hot water?”

“I’ll pass your message along sir.” -CLICK-

And look how friendly Senator Reid is with AT&T. $22,000? They may rank donor number 17, but their contribution to the Majority Leader is far greater than what they give to their lackey Mr. Rockefeller! Are things beginning to come together now?

Is it beginning to make sense why the Senate can’t seem to stop this President’s insanity? Why we can’t seem to get past this problem of warrantless surveilance?

The Majority Leader, it seems, loves his contributors more than he loves the Constitution.

Crossposted at Brendan calling

the Speaker apparently is not making herself popular in her high-dollar ‘hood, telling reporters on Tuesday that protesters have taken up residence outside her house and are driving the natives wild.

“I’ve had four or five months of people sitting outside my home, going into my garden in San Francisco and angering my neighbors,” Pelosi said at a gathering sponsored by the Christian Science Monitor.

Pelosi added that the squatters have engaged in decidedly non-neighborly behavior like hanging their clothes from the trees; moving in sofas, chairs and other “permanent living facilities”; and, oddly, building a large Buddha on the sidewalk in front of her home. “You can just imagine my neighbors’ reactions to all of this,” she said. “And if they were poor, and they were sleeping on my sidewalk, they’d be arrested for loitering, but because they have ‘impeach Bush’ across their chest, it’s the First Amendment.”

Poor, poor, poor Nancy Pelosi, besieged by angry peasants who want to hold her to account. And to think, after all she’s done: taking impeachment off the table, letting right wing idiots like Steny Hoyer and Rahm Emmanuel call the shots in the House, folding on FISA, refusing to enforce subpoenas, REFUSING TO END THE FUCKING WAR LIKE SHE PROMISED. You’d figure people would be showering her with roses and jelly-beans. Not.

Could the contempt for ordinary Americans and those less-fortunate be any clearer? “And if they were poor, and they were sleeping on my sidewalk, they’d be arrested for loitering”: What a truly remarkable statement from the Speaker of the House. It makes you almost forget there was a time when Democrats stood up for the poor and disenfranchised: the Speaker sounds more like Barbara Bush than the top official in the People’s House: “Why should we hear about body bags and deaths? Oh, I mean, it’s not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that?”

Yes, if they were simply “poor, and they were sleeping on my sidewalk, they’d be arrested for loitering”, because that’s how you deal with those people, isn’t it? You have them arrested so the Beautiful People won’t have to look at them, or God forbid, smell their appalling body odor.

And even better account can be found at the Washington Post (thanks to a commenter at Huffington for mentioning it):

“We have to make responsible decisions in the Congress that are not driven by the dissatisfaction of anybody who wants the war to end tomorrow,” Pelosi told the gathering at the Sofitel, arranged by the Christian Science Monitor. Though crediting activists for their “passion,” Pelosi called it “a waste of time” for them to target Democrats. “They are advocates,” she said. “We are leaders.”

Actually, Nancy, you’re not really not doing much in the way of “leading” at all: what you’re doing is obstructing the wishes of your party’s base, angering your constituents, and breaking promises left and right. You’re giving away the farm to BushCo: that’s not leadership AT ALL.

You know who the real leaders are Nancy? It’s those dirty fucking hippies “advocates” camped out on your sidewalk. It’s the people like me who call your office every single day. It’s the bloggers and netroots who are indeed targeting the most worthless of the Democrats for primaries. They’re the leaders who are holding your feet to the fire and making a public example out of your treachery, and you don’t like that one bit, do you? Because you know how the game works: lead, follow, or get out of the way. So give them some respect: it’s not like YOU spent the summer in a ditch in Crawford Texas. It’s not like YOU have children fighting in Iraq. It’s not like YOU don’t have any health insurance. It’s not YOU who’s facing foreclosure.

So if you’re wondering why the Democrat Party (and I use that term deliberately) can’t seem to keep any of its 2006 promises, if you’re wondering why Karl Rove and Harriet Miers are walking free, if you’re wondering why the war goes on with no end in sight (when anyone who’s been paying attention knows Congress has the power of the purse), if you’re wondering why the President’s illegal spying shenanigans have been allowed to operate unimpeded, if you’re wondering why the Democrat-controlled Congress is on the verge of legalizing those same illegal wiretapping shenanigans, if you’re wondering why Congress is more interested in condemning a citizen’s advocacy group than passing meaningful legislation that reins in President 28%, you really don’t have to look much further than Nancy “I’m a LEADER” Pelosi.

You’re a leader in name only Nancy: a more accurate description would be “roadblock”.

After reading the following unfortunate quote at Susie’s Place, I placed a call to Joe Biden’s office

“Hi, my name is Brendan Skwire. I’m calling because i read what Joe Biden had to say about Iraq, and I wanted to point something out.

Joe Biden said,

‘Other Iraqi politicians have said we have no right to tell the Iraqis (what to do),” Biden told reporters. “Let me tell you, we have a right. Three thousand and eight hundred dead. Twenty seven thousand wounded. Billions of dollars. Let me tell you as President of the United States, they’d have to understand full well that if they don’t keep their commitment to implement their constitution then they’re on their own. And so, ladies and gentlemen, the idea that al Maliki questions whether or not we have a right to express our opinion, he’d better get it straight real quick.’

“The Iraqis did not invite us to invade and occupy their country. Furthermore, the stated reasons for the invasion have all been revealed as false: there were no WMD. There were no nuclear bombs or unmanned drones. Saddam Hussein was no involved with 9/11. So while the loss of 3,800 soldiers and 27,000 wounded is tragic, there was no reason for them to die. They got sent to Iraq because the President lied and your boss, who probably knew the President was lying, acceded to this. So that’s a start. All the premises for the war were wrong.

“But even if the premises for the war were true… well, I just took a look at the Iraq Body Count site, and they’re reporting 74,000 to more than 81,000 civilian deaths. These aren’t soldiers who are trained to fight, and who know that unexpected death is part of their job, these are ordinary people.

“So for Joe Biden to go after the Iraqis, for saying we have no right to tell them what to do… well, I don’t think he’s going to win the presidency that way, and maybe he should just go back to plagiarizing speeches.

“Sir, can I just point out a logical fallacy? You literally just contradicted yourself.”

“Really? How is that?”

“OK, read the statement again.”

“Other Iraqi politicians have said we have no right to tell the Iraqis [what to do]. Let me tell you we have a right—“

“To express his opinion.”

“No, that’s not what he said. Read the statement.”

“I am sir. Read the next line.”

“Let me tell you, we have a right. Three thousand and eight hundred dead.”

“He’s saying he has a right to express his opinion.”

“No he’s not. Read the statement. He says we have a right to tell the Iraqis what to do.”

“No he doesn’t sir. He says he has a right to express his opinion”

“No, he doesn’t… oh wait, down here, way at the bottom? That’s totally changing the subject, and it’s not what he says in the first sentence.”

“Yes, it IS!”

“No, no it’s NOT. It’s not what he says in the first sentence at all. Other Iraq politicians have said we have no right to tell the Iraqis [what to do]. Let me tell you, we have that right. The opinion stuff comes MUCH later.”

“Sir, he has the right to express his opinion.”

“Yes, but that’s not what he SAID. He SAID that we have the right to—“

“Express our opinion.”

“To tell the Iraqis what t—“

“Fine sir, fine, OK? You disagree with his statement,” she sighed angrily. “I have to go now.”

“Yeah, well stop playing games with words.”

“I’m not playing—“

“Your boss is an idiot. And you know what, the way you reason, I gotta wonder how you ever got out of college.”

She hung up before I could ask her why she hadn’t enlisted, but there you have a classic example of political doublespeak and the contortions that politicians and their supporters will make in defense of dishonesty and hateful statements. I think it’s clear to any reader what Biden meant. Even if you take the lying staffer at her words that he meant his opinion, what does one make of the closing “he’s better get it straight real quick”? Or what? Joe Biden will counter Maliki with a more better argument? They’ll agree to disagree? “Come, let us reason together”?

No, that’s not what Biden meant. That last sentence implies “or else.” Biden is not defending his right to have an opinion: he is defending the United States’ perceived right to tell the Iraqis what to do, which Biden believes because he supported the war and doesn’t want his support to have achieved absolutely nothing. Furthermore, as his closing comment makes perfectly clear, Biden believes that if the Iraqis do no do what we tell them to do, we have the right to make sure there are consequences.

This is just standard inferential logic, the kind of thing you learn in high school. When Biden and his staffers pretend words don’t mean what they clearly mean, they are acting in an intellectually dishonest fashion, which is unfortunately typical for the kind of amoral, immoral, conscienceless people who make up a sizeable number of our public servants. They are trying to fool people of good will and clear conscience into supporting stupid policies, needless aggression, and moral turpitude.

Note: In an earlier version of this post, I claimed that Joe Biden has no family in Iraq. That’s incorrect, and so I have removed the claim from this post.