It’s getting really disgustingly teenagerish over there, as evidenced by what happened on my diary here. I almost left for good. I really did.
And then JamesB3, whom I respect greatly but who is not usually known for his tact, knocked some sense into me. And here’s what I figured out.
Look, DKos is a community. For those not familiar with the term, that indicates a large extended family. REALLY large. Like 50,000 people. Like any family, DKos goes through some rough patches. Sometimes even the patriarch or matriarch is unjust, wrong, unfair, stupid. Some people choose to leave the family when that happens; some don’t. I’m not one who does. Just ask my mom, who in my opinion has fallen under some of the above categories for years. I haven’t severed my ties with her, and I’m not about to sever them with Kos.
It’s a fair point that I’m a man, that it wasn’t my biggest issue that was attacked, that I can’t really empathize with those who feel personally slighted by Kos. First of all, I feel personally slighted by him too, as many of my favorite authors (Lorraine, MaryScott, etc.) were attacked. You hurt my friends, you hurt me. Second of all, I don’t know how I would feel if Kos came out and said the environment (which is my biggest cause) really didn’t matter and was getting in the way of Dems getting elected. As a matter of fact, I expect that issue to be brought up sometime soon, as “conservation” is an inherently conservative value. But would I leave Kos? Not unless I was prepared to leave the Democratic Party.
Why? Because Kos is my family. Also, because the Kos community is the soul of the Democratic Party. Now that we’ve all dispersed, there is a “Kos diaspora,” as someone here or there wisely put it. So I’ll keep coming here, a lot, for people like Lorraine and PastorDan and Booman and Militarytracy and more. But I’ll stay there too, for people like JamesB3 and Armando and Folkbum and more. Because those people matter to me too.
Let me make this clear: I’m NOT telling anyone they shouldn’t leave Kos. There are plenty of compelling reasons to go (my thread contains some of the very best ones right now). But I’m staying because I’ll hang on till past when my knuckles are white loving all the people there, and the people here too.
Sorry for the incoherence, people. I’ve been fighting these battles all day. Bear with me.
a prevailing mood of anger around here tonight — anger at Kos, anger at his minions over there, anger at the whole world. But I hear this is a pretty forgiving place (it was when I was here last, right after the founding), so I hoped another perspective might be accepted as well.
Wow, what a trial by fire we’ve all been through lately! I’m thinking of things we can do to cool down and re-form as a community over here. Like…(off the top of my head)…we could do a conference call or something. Or all have a virtual meal together (you know, we all sit down for tea at our respective computers and chat on a thread). Any other ideas?
Thanks for not leaving. I disagree with the tactic/behavior/reasoning of leaving when there’s ideological (and, in this case: intolerant, rude, and mentally incompetent) opposition, but out of respect I won’t go into that here.
I think things are starting to turn over there. In any case I’ve experienced a complete shift of perspective after a diary last night by James King. It was awful. Don’t read it. But it really became clear to me that these people — those who say “quit whining, it’s just an ad, good riddance stupid women!” — are absolutely not playing by the rules or adhering to any standard of decency. They don’t care. They feel they are completely outside all norms of behavior and decorum. And since they’ve put themselves outside those principles of politeness, I no longer feel any compunction or obligation to treat them as Kossacks. In my first few responses to James King’s diary I used the word “purge,” a lot. I’ve sort of backed away from that formulation, but in general it’s a “they go or I go” sort of thing, and I’m taking an active role in making sure I get to stay.
And those people who are just operating without regards to truth, outside the realm of decorum, are really REALLY widening the rift. I understand that some people think Kos is entirely to blame for encouraging them. However, I’m personally angry at them for making everyone hate Kos so much. I’m personally upset that so many at dKos want so much to be someone, ANYONE’s little brownshirts that they’ll take a statement such as Kos’ and use it as justification for what we’ve seen. Of course I think Kos should apologize or explain further, but I’m not especially mad at him. If you are, that’s your right and I understand. But this could’ve been handled reasonably — at one point — had there not been some latent adolescent fantasy of working as shock troops for some militant cause.
Anyway, that was sort of rambling, but thanks for all those who haven’t left dKos, and good luck to those of us who’ve used this opportunity to get dual citizenship with other blogs — as I have here — and the “new colonies” that’ve welcomed us.
I admit, I didn’t even notice the ads (selective vision, I guess) and wasn’t aware of the controversy until this morning.
But I will say this. I try to follow the golden rule, do unto others as you would want them to do unto you. When I post comments, I try to think not only of what I want to say, but how the post can be interpreted. Often times I will delete entire paragraphs, or after reflection, the entire post (before posting), if I don’t think it contributes to the conversation. I am a cynic and like snark, but not at the expense of the board.
I also realize that I will not agree 100% with everybody on Kos (or Booman), so I will try to learn from them and see where I can teach them something or where I can learn from them. And I can honestly say that I have learned the most from people I initially disagreed with.