Suskind Goes Back To Work
World Keeps Spinning
The writer, Suskind, suffered through day five of a wretched mood, while the world kept spinning. “I don’t understand it, ” he said, “Polanski wins his defamation suit against Vanity Fair… Elaine Kaufman and Mia Farrow are two of his witnesses.. even though his testimony was taken via intercontinental communications… while I in my misery over lovelessness and crap recognition for crap writing can’t even manage a mention in the want ads…. Well, I can get my name in the paper there, but I have to pay for it.”
Only ten days ago I was made a feature writer, but when I went home to celebrate with the Loved One, I found the L.O. had flown the coop with no forwarding address. Since then I haven’t been able to eat, sleep or write at all. My warped sense of humor has taken a nose dive into the muck of swamplike depression, and all the happy people around me look like tellytubbies larking about in green valleys under too blue skies… (To Be Continued
My writing partner, who is staying in the house with seven of his ten children, manages to put out several thousand words a day, while I lie fallow going over the sonnets of Shakespeare and pulp pornography from the 1950’s. He and his children are no bother at all, and we have managed to get some work done. He takes what I’ve written, scratches through every sentence of mine that begins with “I” and erases any reference to him. Then he wipes out my belief system and interjects his own… thus rewriting my piece to one of his, which turns out brilliantly, while I am left to study him to try to find out what I meant in the first place, so I can rewrite my piece behind his back.)
What did I do to piss you off this time, Baby?
This would be a lot of fun, but in the pursuit of my orignial piece I have been falling to pieces. Now I find I have nothing at all to say, and too many words to say it with. It is the Loved One’s fault… all of it. But there is no dog to kick, no dishes to break, and nothing to drink in the house… and as far as I can tell the FBC is closed, and I am six hours ahead of Boston, 8 hours ahead of California, and am getting ahead of myself altogether. I don’t even remember the story I was working on before I got derailed into the ditch of no return….. If I ever fall in love again, I will make sure to fall out of it posthaste… my health, my career, and my sanity…. all gone to mush and slobber.
Raglan Road
On Raglan Road of an autumn day
I saw her first and knew
That her dark hair would weave a snare
that I might one day rue.
I saw the danger and I passed
along the enchanted wayand
I said let grief be a fallen leaf
at the dawning of the day.
On Grafton Street in November
we tripped lightly along the lay
of a deep ravine where can be seen
the worth of passions play.
The queen of hearts still making tarts
and I not making hay.
Oh, I love too much and by such,
by such is happiness thrown away.
I gave her gifts of the mind
I gave her the secret sign
Known to the artists who have known
the true Gods of sound and stone.
And words and tint I did not stint,
I gave her poems to say.
With her own name there
and her own dark hair
like clouds over the fields of May.
On a quiet street where old ghosts meet,
I see her walking now
away from me so hurriedly
my reason must allow
that I had loved not as I should
a creature made of clay.
When tha angel woos
the clay he’ll lose
his wings at the dawn of the day.
Patrick Kavanaugh
Well, fun’s over, have gone back to work. Now pursuit of the work is pursuit of the self lost in pursuit of the Loved One. Only ten days ago I had something to do, something to love, something to believe in and something to write. Must go back to recreate myself in a way that will not end in predementia praecox, and a musty claustrophobic closet of old costumes of period plays… my life’s romantic pursuits… what a terrible waste of time.
you need someone to talk with, for sure. I know how it feels, I”ve been there, and done that, so I understand.
Have you tried going over to Diane’s ? her and Shirl may be around, if not, I’ll be there, probably a good place to hash this out, how about it?
By all means Suskind, get on over to the village where we take care of things such as this..
You can even cross post this diary there? Follow my link!
Diane101-
I’m getting a weird ‘access denied’ message at your site. But I’m logged in.
me too. 🙁
can’t get a password for access D…?
And I am user ID Number What????
I AM USER ID NUMBER THIRTEEN, DIANE…. THIRTEEN !!!!
Jesus. Of all the gin joints in all the world I had to walk into mine.
hey suskind, diane is hav’n a lil’ site tech probs right now, so everyone hang tight, and I’m sure she’ll get it straight….
hell, 13 is my lucky number ; ) I’ll swap ya man…for sure LOL
I love when my birthday falls on Friday the 13th — best birthdays EVER!!
So how do I get to Diane’s place?
she has a link in her post upthread, but hav’n some tech probs right now, or was anyway…she should have it fixed soon….
it’s http://www.villageblue.com check it out, no politics, just casual fun…
.
Got married on Friday the 13th!
Still … 34 years later!
#
Blue Village?
Got her guard up – security wise – just will not let anyone pass easily.
~~~
Don’t Bogart that gin joint, my friend. 🙂
Round up the usual supsects!
(facing the wall, hands on wall, legs spread) uuhhh wow man, it was only a lil’ herb man…whooaaaa
Legs spread??
“I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship”
🙂
LMAO….hmmmm,,,is that why they always want you in that position…must have been preparation for the new Bush Administration ~@^@~
With this Admin… they want you bound and gagged.
well, they have them in the prisons that way, Gitmo, etc, and they’re get’n pretty damned close to that here in the states….ouch!!
back to my site now, I think you can get in….Please do come, and suskind please post your diary there, it will be only the third member to post something, do it under forum, and under spiritual corner maybe, be sure to see catagories…
great news….CONGRATS
and Bush Inc’s Lemmings are loving it – they just can’t get enough it seems.
I think it won’t be too long off when Bush tries to sell us all the bag of goods that in order to be truly patriotic one must give up all their rights to ensure complete faith and respect to those who are leading the way to liberty, democracy and freedumb.
Only a good patriot is a non-thinking patrioti.
Then they’ll have a Grape Kool Aid holiday for all the lemmings. Assume the postition… DRINK Up.
that’s what I wanna be when I grow up….a “Repub-la-dumb” yueppers…. ; )
Beyun a Bushie iz hurrd werrk.
🙂
Other day I was painting the hallway and had on American Idiot by Green Day. HOT DAMN!!!!It still gets me pumped up.
Its a full house, apparently.
Everybody’s got the blues….maybe because its hotter than the streets of hell on a Saturday night…
Booman, I just made a post on the Froggy Cafe for diane, she’s having some tech probs right now, and working on them,
wanted to pass this on to the folks here…thanks
Talk to Shirl, get her to take you on one of her trips. Works wonders.
I don’t even remember the story I was working on before I got derailed into the ditch of no return.
You have to try. You just sat at the keyboard and wrote this diary. Tell us a story. That’s all, just tell us a story.
[And what infedelpig said….]
One man’s plateau is another man’s Geromino… It might seem you aren’t getting anywhere. Trust me I know that feeling well, but later on down the road, you see how many steps you have taken. Sometime’s the biggest leaps and bounds we’ve made we didn’t notice we had taken at the time.
You’ll get through this. By might or by muddle but you’ll get through it.
You have to… I want to read your story and hear more and more about you.
If all else fails… “Live & Let Die” and some tasty tortilla chips might help you with the next few hours.
Above all elese… please know that you are superduper liked around here 🙂
And the world keeps spinning. I hate it when it does that! Meanwhile, many hands to hold here, including mine. I guess as long as we’re holding hands and spinning anyway we could all let go at once and play “Statue.” You there, suskind, holding that position, you look like Talent and Grace.
LMAO….dayum kansas, when you let me go, I was fall’n on my arse…nutt’n worse than a fat man on his arse… ; )
The new Love Object will know how to express herself.
img src=”http://realitytv.about.com/library/images/bl-kirsteyalley2.jpg”>
I’m going to paper the house with Kirstie Alley photos… and FAT ONES, too. The more the merrier.
I AM GOING TO PAPER THE HOUSE IN KIRSTIE ALLEY PICTURES. REALLY REALLY FAT ONES. I WILL BEGIN IN THE MORNING. A NEW PROJECT.
hell, I always thought she was seeexxxxxxxxxxxyyyyyyyy….Hooooooooo Laawwwwwd..(evil laugh)
the (GOP) Good Ole Position
Finger Flash! 🙂
Ive been involved in 24 breakups, three of them ending legal matrimonies.
Lately I ve been doing the dumping. Trying to get even I guess.
Only 18 more dumpees and I’ll be standing .500 lifetime.
But I’m too old to get there. Hangin em up at 3-21.
we must be from the same school….LOL
Damn. I thought batting 330 was bad…I’m humbled…:{)
Getting in the mood to blast full volume George Thoroughgood and the Destroyers
George Thourghgood is great tunes, and don’t worry about what you did….think about what your gonna do bro ; ) (like have a real life, that you don’t have to walk on glass ; )
by accident, and i cleaned it up…. but the glass i broke on purpose i threw into the fireplace by way of celebration…. and that was the cheap stuff….
shit, there’s too much death in the world not to LIVE.
I am looking forward to my next conquest… please God let it not be another writer/editor…… the plague of my existence…..
will know how to do something fantastic and much needed…
they’ll be able to brew their own homemade ROOT BEER!
Next life, that’s gonna’ be on the top of my “must have” list 🙂
There ya go…I know that moveon.com is taken, but you might wanna check on the others, .net, .org. dot something, and make it your new website man….your “move’n on” ; )
I’ve decided that I’m going to be God’s gift to blind women ; ) yeppers….(gotta make sure they can’t feel too good, with their fingers…well wait a minute….let me think bout that one ; )
move on dot com might have some spare e mail blanks for me…. passionate slob seeks mate to mate with… and to discuss the news… and to post letters to that become essays that end up published in major newspapers… without the arguments… “hey, you son of a bitch, is this my letter to you in the Times????”””
ok…maybe I exaggerated my failure slightly…not to make ME look like a big man to my friends,you understand, but to let you know a life without loss and regret… is well, a life for robots. John Robots.
1-3 lifetime is more the reality of my particular losing record….
good luck, Mr. Suskind and stay hard.
Breakups are good for writers like you who arent afraid to put the real truth down on the page…
…..and for the rest of us who might need to find someone else’s hard truth in order to recognize our own.
“If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow
Don’t be alarmed now
It’s just a spring clean for the May Queen” Page/Plant
Hedgerow… Never knew that was a word used outside of a Led Zep lyric. 🙂
Not much to add that someone here hasn’t said better already, and you don’t even know me, but wanted to say that you’re doing a hell of a lot better than I do being depressed….just keep writing!
I’ll read….
Hang in there, friend! This too, shall pass.
I’m sorry about your wretched mood, suskind (and the reason for it) but I’ve got to confess… this is just the funniest diary. I’ve (sadly) chuckled my way all through it, starting with the picture on top, and going on to being number THIRTEEN!, and of course all the comments (and Kirstie, natch).
But then, I always did have an inconvenient sense of humor 🙂
I do hope things get better for you soon, though!
You win a case of spirits of your choice… because the whole thing was intended as humor… even though the break-up was real, and I have been a wounded animal for the last five days…
Yes, Nanette, “The Play’s The Thing” said Shakespeare, who never failed to have a love affair, but that the Loved One was immortalized in one fashion or another.
You Nanette, are just my cup of tea… would you like one?
I was ready to prostrate myself in apology (since I was down there anyway dying of laughter), if my empathy meter had broken, and my comment offended or sent you Over The Edge ;).
A cup of tea seems just the thing… and my spirits request would be that they be gentle, joyful, ancestral, and… oh wait, you probably meant the other kind.
And I’m out trying to contact the gentle, joyous ancestral…. adjusting my spiritual shortwave…. will take a little more work, as we’ve been tuned in to “The Perfect Storm” for quite a while now.
Hey there, suskind! I promised you over at Diane’s last night that I’d check in. I am about to go off and try to remember what it is like to be a professional peron and interact with people over th age of six….wish me luck!
I hope you’re having a better morning, er, afternoon? evening? Whatever it is where you are! 😉
We are all the walking wounded, sweetheart, but you have all the right stuff to wear your wounds well! (If you publish this in the Times, please do let your housemate scratch red and blue all over it first!!)
Ha!
ahem.
Would that be Eva Peron?? That should put some sway in your swagger. (Swaygger?) In any case, we won’t cry for you. Just for suskind.
I mean these two are so in love, and clearly made for each other…..
Hey Suskind… love the pics of you and your ex. I’ve been there. Congratulations on being able to see the humor in spite of your pain. That’s the most important thing sometimes. Best wishes to you.
Another offer with great interest will be along soon, probably sitting in your mailbox as I type. Near bankruptcy eventually guaranteed. Please take a moment to weep for my husband since he’s married to a Gemini which means this
or this
on any given morning or any given day. The best way to know who I am going to be so that he can dress accordingly is to flip a coin.
your husband must have a great sense of adventure…hmmm…. is that first one sheryl lee? i think i’m the only one who thought that John Carpenter’s Vampires was a GREAT movie!!!
That first photo is me and that second photo is me. These are photos that my husband has taken to support his case in divorce court should I ever go so far as to bite him. What is all this talk about vampires and movies……what are vampires? No Credit Card? Well no wonder you are having a tough time with the girls you silly guy!
The same blue eyes, the same dress…..it’s me dude!
The FIRST Rule.
Never drink or get high while unhappy.
The SECOND Rule.
Never drink or get high if you have something inmportant to do the next day.
The THIRD rule.
ALWAYS have something important to do the next day. (Except once in a while…)
AG