Suddenly in 2002, I realized that there were people called “liberals” who were held in serious disdain by the people who were called “conservatives.”
It happened the day we said to a family member that we thought Bush was wrong to attack Iraq, that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11. All hell broke loose. It never occurred to me that this family member could not see it. They are highly educated, intelligent.
It did not register until during the confrontation I heard the word “liberal” being tossed about angrily. It took days before it all sank in. I realized they really had no clue, they only heard what the RNC said and what the military said. Much of their contacts were still in the military, and it never entered their minds to question.
Even sadder and scarier, I tried to share my heartbreak with another family member in another state. Again a well-educated, well-read individual whose family had fallen under Rush Limbaugh’s spell. They trusted him for their news. Another heartbreak there. We never really finished the conversation that day.
Yet another, one of my children, stunned me. He called to see why everyone was so angry with me. Apparently they had contacted him. I told him his Dad and I questioned the reasons for war. He said he trusted the president, and the others did as well.
He said it is not the time to be questioning our nation’s leader. This is not a stupid guy. He is a brilliant young man with a good life and several graduate degrees.
We have tried since then, but we can’t get back to where we were. I have made it clear that I am not going to back down, that when they are ready to talk….I am willing. But I told them they had better come well-armed to dispute me on things, as I had facts on my side.
We still try, our son calls. We talk about mundane things. It is really easier not to really talk much.
This family of mine was once one which never thought it would split apart like this. I think they all now know, they have to know by now…they have to know by now what horrible things Bush as done. As I say, they are nothing if not brilliant people.
But there is a stubbornness that lingers, and I have it as well. I feel like they left us hanging out to dry and questioned our patriotism and our understanding.
I never even thought of myself as anything but a moderate, religious person who cared about people. This president managed to turn my family upside down, and I am still dumbfounded at how it all happened.
I hear other stories, and the people always say to fix the problem….don’t let it go. But I don’t think some things are really fixable, not yet. I refuse to give up what I believe, and I have facts on my side.
It may not be fixed for a long time. Their power was so entrenched in our culture that we were divided before we even defined ourselves. It was a sudden onslaught of hate and anger that caught good people off guard.
I forgive them for the things they said, but that is all I can do right now. It is their turn to step up and realize they lost their country also.
