Progress Pond

Rush Limbaugh’s real mistress

Last week, Rush Limbaugh again got some on-air mileage with his mistress shtick, implying that soon-to-be wife-to-be #4 (gotta hand it to those Republicans who practice their one-at-a-time form of polygamy), had emailed him about President Bush’s October 6 ‘war on terror’ speech.

Her name: CNN’s Daryn Kagan

I say let’s try an intervention in an attempt to save Ms. Kagan from future misery.
Daryn honey. I don’t know how to gently break this to you but Rush has but one real mistress.

Her name (R)oxy Contin.

You ask who this floozy is?

Well, she comes in many colors (how exotic!) and apparently the more Rush ‘had’ of her, the more he wanted:

According to Rush’s former housekeeper, he and (R)oxy did it about 4,350 times in one 47-day period. (Rushy’s gotta be getting some other ‘help’ here–maybe from something in blue?)

Daryn, you ask how in the world would Rush’s housekeeper know?

Reports indicate she was also involved–apparently some sort of ‘menage a trois’ type arrangement.

Dear Daryn, yes, Rush does like to shop, one of his many endearing attractions to females. Unfortunately, ‘doctor shopping’ violates various legal statutes.

But we have a question for you Daryn. Why has Rush, who underwent cochlear implant surgery to repair deafness somehow brought on by his association with the dastardly (R)oxy, has apparently only recovered in his right (wrong) ear?

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