The making of a Conspiracy Theorist
Is it Nature or Nurture, environment experience or a psychological disorder, a predisposition or misfiring of brain synapses? Yep, it is probably all of these or some combination of them and more.
Some folks like to consider me one of those CT’s. I personally don’t consider myself such, but when you hold thoughts and potentials outside of the mainstream people feel the need to discredit you in some way, or place a label on you. How dare you not go along with what everyone else feels is the absolute! So I have a lot of fun pretending to don and wear a tinfoil hat with antenna properly adjusted. It’s okay for others to make fun of me or discredit me, or label me, I really don’t mind. We need more laughter here.
So how did I get to this place outside of the mainstream? Gosh, it just had to be, didn’t it? I started early. As a very small child I found out that adults lie. Adults lied to me all of the time. I almost always found out about the lies, usually sooner than later. Adults always told me it was for my own good that they lied to me. It never was, really. So I concluded that adults did not think I was very smart, or smart enough to know what was good for me. Yet, I had some very strong sense that the truth was always better no matter how bad it sounded or seemed at the moment. I still tend to question everything. Nothing personal, I just do.
I also have always had a strong proclivity to believing ANYTHING is possible. Most normally that limitless possibility thinking is very positive and focused on optimistic outcomes of the highest order. However, it also spills over in all those lies we live in every day and the possible agenda behind those lies. It is not something I focus on a lot, but I presume the possibility. Sometimes after accumulating more information and more experience the possibles become probables. I keep the options open. Too many try to pull the wool over my eyes too often for me not to. But I still expect the best outcomes available, and even better than those that seem available.
When I became thoroughly convinced I could not believe my government, ever, was when I was in the Army in 1965. The lies about Viet Nam were more than enough. However, I was stationed at White Sands Missile Range, a top secret base of weapons and spy equipment technology testing. I had no reason to know or see the things that people kept insisting that I look at and oooh and awe over with them. My job did not require it, but people of all ranks just could not stop themselves from showing me this stuff. So much for taking seriously the security concerns of “eyes only” and “cryptic” classifications, let alone “top secret.” No one of any rank seemed concerned about their casual displaying of such information. This is not a blanket statement about all secret information handled and processed in and by the military in all installations everywhere. This is just my experience in my job at White Sands.
The planes, missiles, spy equipment toys I saw there were phantasmagorical. Unbelievable at that time. So when our Government showed them to all via the news media, 20, 30 or 40 years later as THE LATEST AND GREATEST, NEWEST STUFF OUT THERE. . .I laughed. So it wasn’t so new and hot technology to me when it was unveiled all those years later. My thoughts about this have always been if this is what they are displaying as the newest and latest, what do they really have that they are already using and not telling us about? I’m just the curious type.
And when we do uncover or the government reveals to us some “secret” or lie that they have been telling us for however long, or continues to keep secrets that should not be secrets at all, their reasoning is it is/was for our own good, and we just couldn’t handle the truth. Gosh! that sounds just so much like what I heard at 3 years old, doesn’t it?
I relate to those who have been thoroughly trounced and discredited in their life and times, yet proved to have been more right than loony. People like Galileo, Newton, Columbus, Einstein, De Vinci and many, many others. They were big dreamers who held possibilities and later proved possibilities to be probabilities, probabilities to be fair certainties. No I surely don’t put myself in their class or level of brain power or accomplishment. But I sure do understand their limitless potential thinking.
So here’s the deal these days. I am skeptical of it all until or unless I have enough information to push me to either the yea or nay column. Sure, I am still sometimes hoodwinked, but not often. And yes I remember distinctly that all lies usually have some elements of truth in them, that’s what makes them believable to those who choose to believe them. I seem to be extraordinarily good at detecting lies and liars, not surprising having been surrounded by them all of my life.
I take everything I hear, see and read with a grain of salt, but still option to hold things in limitless possibility, especially if they are optimistic and for the real common good of all.
I feel certain that things, despite the horrendous mess our world seems to be in at the moment, will turn out in the very best possible way. Regardless of what we may have to go through to get there. Maybe we can’t even see how that is possible, but I believe it is possible and that it will come to pass.
There is no expectation that others should or would believe as I do. But maybe enough of us will that things will change and change dramatically for the better. Thanks for listening and please feel free to offer your opinions whether confirmation of my “craziness” or something else. I don’t mind. Really I don’t.
What about you? Are you a strict logic absolutist? A mostly logical nonconspirist? A bit of a disbeliever but not willing to go too far outside the lines when you color? Or a wild dreamer as I am? Or something Else? Just curious and interested if you care to share.
Here’s to a far better world than the one we are seeing now,
Hugs
Shirl