I.
We are trying to keep up our use of petro-chemicals, but I never feel quite patriotic anymore. I got the large polyester American flag down at WalMart, and it said “A product of the USA, made in China,” but they don’t really make polyester any more, its some uber-polymer made from Humvee residue, and the package said, “Made from destroyed armament and materiel created protecting your freedom!” and it turns out that there is a disclaimer on the back of the label which stated that the actual flag was “Designed in the USA, fabric processed in The Free Republic of Irac (sic), assembled and packaged in China, stitched in Viet Nam,” and it also said that “Collateral damage may have occurred in the collection of raw materials contained in this product,” and “God Bless America®.”
II.
We flew with our one and a half year old daughters this weekend, and security is strange indeed. Among the absurdities: If you’ve ever had to do a diaper change on an airplane, then you know the value of hand-sanitizer. It was lucky for us that it is banned when carried in a diaper bag, but not in a purse. Small children like to drink water, so we brought water for them which we had to dump out before going through security, then buy some more on the other side, then dump the rest of that before we got on the plane and then get some more once on the plane. Yogurt must be eaten before security, but soft cheese is ok on the other side. Diaper crème can be on either side, but not lotion for other parts of their bodies, which is confiscated. The x-ray machine picked up a medicine bottle with a dropper, so a secondary screening was required. The TSA Agent actually asked me if there was anything sharp in the diaper bag which might injure him. The bag had already been through the x-ray machine, along with Pig and Monkey and four very small shoes.
Strange times indeed.
