Cross posted at Brendan Calling

Ring. Riiiiiiing.

“Hello, Senator Rockefeller’s office.”

“Hi there, my name’s Brendan Skwire, and I need some help from the Senator.

“It seems I’ve broken a few laws, and I’m looking at a felony conviction.
The judge has pretty much rejected my arguments of innocence, so I was wondering how much it will cost me to get Senator Rockefeller to write an ex post facto bill giving me immunity from my crimes. I don’t have as much money as AT&T, but since Senator Rockefeller’s selling indulgences, I was wondering how much it’ll cost me. Can you give me some idea?”

“Sir, if you’d just look at Senator Rockefeller’s website, he explai–”

“Oh yeah, I’ve been to his website. And I’ve also been reading about how the Senator didn’t get any donations to speak of from AT&T until 2006-2007, when it spiked by nearly $20,000, so I’ve been wondering how much will it cost me to buy Senator Rockefeller?”

“Sir, I’ll pass your message along.”

“Thanks. Hey, why’s he doing this anyway? He’s independently wealthy, and doesn’t need the $25,000 or whatever.”

“Sir–”

“And what gives him the right to sell of my Fourth Amendment rights? Those rights aren’t his to sell, and they’re worth a hell of a lot more than a measley $25,000. You might even say they’re priceless.”

“I’ll pass your message along.” -Click-

Jay Rockefeller deserves to burn in Hell for his shameful sell-out. The man is no better than Quisling or Petain. Tom Paine, Ben Franklin, and the rest of the Founding Fathers are spinning in their graves right now.