Happy Holidays from the Bush Whitehouse

I think I know what George Bush has been up to the past many months. He’s been making a movie.

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If there is any doubt, let me say here, someone over at the Bush White House is mainlining massive amounts of drugs. No wonder we lost the drug war.

You see the Bush Christmas message to America in 2008, at the end of eight years chock full of the strangest mothereffing stuff you hope to never see again, is, well, I’m not sure exactly.

But it does feature the twins and the new son-in-law dude and, of course, cuddles, or bubbles or pickles, uh, the First Lady, uh, Laura, and his majesty himself, looking like he might be the one taking massive amounts of anti-depressants with snorts of Vicks-Vapo-Rub.

But the stars, the stars of the show are the Bush dogs, you know the ones who ate all those important emails about Plame and Abramoff and US Attorneys and Torture not to mention all the pesky flawed intelligence emails in the lead-up to the great war in Mesopotamia – Barney and the lesser known Beatrice or whatever: I’m not going to watch the damn thing again to find out.

The Bush Christmas message is, well, golly, you see, Barney is supposed to decorate the White House for Christmas and the camera follows Barney around as other people – none of which are the Bushes – servants, I guess they’d be called, do the actual work. And Barney supervises. And the Bushes just lie around doing nothing and seem really, really bored to tears they have to send any message at all to the American People during the modern depression era Holidays.

The video is on par, production wise, with Al Qaeda Media Services. When the screen splits as we follow Barney around getting things done the Bushes are too lazy to do for themselves, it’s impossible to watch. Al Qaeda videos are much easier to watch and understand. The Bush video is just plain vapid. The Bush Christmas Message makes the Stupids look like the Einsteins, if you know what I mean. The cast, except for the President seemed to memorize their lines, while the President appears to read a cue card from a quarter mile away and at an awkward angle from any known reality.

Seriously, when you look at this thing, one does wonder if every single employee at the White House has bailed and not a soul is left to guide the First Family to make any kind of coherent statement: Any acknowledgment the President, First Lady, the kids and pets have any clue whatsoever the confusion, chaos and utter devastation the Bushes have foisted upon the globe. Indeed, this Christmas for very many will quite blue as in the blues, as in sad, depressed and forlorn.

The Bushes don’t seem to know or care. The quintessential family in a bubble. Like one of those snow-globes you shake and watch the snow fall on a provincial country scene.

Frozen smiles, frozen words, frozen souls. That’s what best describes the Bushes. The old man appears in state of stuperous shock; the first lady trying to ignore the obvious and put on a face of normalcy, while the kids log in their time with the ‘rents’ over the holidays but can’t wait to get out and light up a big one on the south portico.

So, anyway, it’s fitting I guess, this final holiday message from the Bush Family is soulless, clueless and rather Marie Antoinette-like in its ‘let em eat cake’ ignorance of the real lives of real people.

Happy Holidays!