In a stunning announcement today, newly self-appointed President Lindsey Graham, claiming that he had stayed at a Holiday Inn last night, decided the EPA no longer needed to regulate greenhouse gas emissions since he could write and enforce any necessary regulation of carbon emissions himself.
“Scientists have got it all wrong throughout history” he told Dana Milbank of the the Washington Post in an exclusive interview. “Einstein for example claiming God doesn’t gamble. You’d think he’d never read the Book of Job. They and their so-called expertise are vastly overrated.”
When asked if his background as a lawyer and former prosecutor of Bill Clinton qualified him to overrule federal scientists on the best approach to eliminating carbon emissions linked to global climate change Graham replied: “Why, I can do this stuff with two hands tied behind my back after a frontal lobotomy and a two day bender at a bondage club with Michael Steele.”
EPA officials were unavailable for comment.
Okay, so the above is a slight exaggeration …
Sen. Lindsey Graham said Monday he expects to introduce a bill by the end of April that would help the economy and control greenhouse gases better than rules proposed by the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency.
Speaking to business and environmental leaders in Columbia, Graham, R-S.C., and state regulators said the new EPA rules are more far-reaching than necessary to control carbon dioxide, a major contributor to global warming.
The S.C. Department of Health and Environmental Control says the regulations are so sweeping they could affect large homes and small businesses, not just industries that produce the bulk of greenhouse gases.
“Anybody that produces carbon, from a small farmer to a church, is potentially affected,” Graham said. “And I believe the way to regulate carbon – and it should be regulated by the way – is through Congress, not through the EPA.”
Graham is working with Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., and Joseph Lieberman, I-Conn., on new legislation. The bill would pre-empt the EPA regulations.
You want to know what I want to know? I can understand Sen. Joseph Lieberman (Party of Me, Myself and I) working with this clown on a “bi-partisan approach” to controlling greenhouse gas emissions, but John Kerry? Didn’t Democrats learn anything from their so-called romancing of Senators Susan Collins, Olympia Snowe and Charles “Not the Kid friendly Chucky” Grassley on a bi-partisan approach to health care reform? Are they going to allow the same Republican legislative tricks and their deceptive approach to “bi-partisanship” to play out over and over on every piece of legislation that John McCain has already told us will get no Republican support?
Why Senator Kerry? Why are you wasting our time and yours getting in bed with Lindsey Graham on anything. If the Republicans have shown us anything over the last year, it is that they are not your friends, they are not your colleagues, they don’t want to pass any legislation with the majority and bi-partisan to them is just another word for “Hell no dumbass!”
Let the EPA do their job. If you don’t like what they propose, work with your fellow Democrats to craft an alternative. But do the smart thing for once. Take the Republicans at their word. They don’t want to pass any bill that primarily bears the imprimatur of President Obama or the Democratic majorities in Congress. All they want to do is make you, Senator Kerry, and any Democratic politician like you, look bad. That should be obvious to any five year old by now. Why it isn’t obvious to you and any other Democrat who still believes that he or she can “play nice” with Republicans is beyond my power to comprehend.
