Deconstructing A Piece Of American "News"

Which incidentally may be the single funniest piece-of-shit news item that I have ever seen.

DIGITAL DRUGS: How Teens Are Using The Internet To Get High”

                                 

A new online craze has young people getting high off of “digital drugs,” [Oklahoma] News 9 reports.

The trend, called i-Dosing, is a supposedly “legal” and “safe” way to alter one’s consciousness.

According to [Oklahoma]  News 9, these “digital drugs” use “binaural, or two-toned, technology to alter your brain waves and mental state,” producing a “state of ecstasy” for the user. i-Dosers listen to these atonal tracks while sitting motionless with headphones on.

It may sound benign, but parents, educators and law officials are worried that i-Dosing could be addictive, harmful, and a gateway “drug” to other illegal substances. The Oklahoma Bureau of Narcotics and Dangerous Drugs has taken an interest in the phenomenon. “Kids are going to flock to these sites just to see what it is about,” the Bureau’s spokesperson Mark Woodward told Kansas News 9, “and it can lead them to other places.”

Read on.
Now let us disregard for a moment the entirely possible harmful effects of such consumption…I mean, brainwaves can be scrambled by flashing lights as well…and instead examine who is saying this.

Go look at the video.

Middle class white grownups are saying this. Middle class white grownups who have been subjected to tens of thousands of hours of hypnomedia since infancy…TV-based hypnomedia that makes this little I-Dosing trick look like a child’s clumsy magic act.

Go look at them, people!

Clomp clomp-clomping media zombies, every one.

And then go look in the fucking mirror.

Hmmmmm….

NEWSTRIKE!!!

MEDIASTRIKE!!!

CULTURESTRIKE!!!

VAYA!!!

If you consume television…especially television news of any kind whatsoever…w/out making a ongoing, continual effort to remain awake to every attempt at subliminal, cultural-hypnosis tweaking of your inner beak…you are just as funny as are these fear-filled people.

Funny?

The laugh that does not mean “Ha-ha” funny.

According to Oklahoma News 9.

Go look.

Watch the video. With your brains in the air. Please.

The big daddy talking head. (Kelly Ogle. Dickens couldn’t have come up with a better name.)

“The latest internet craze!!! Have you ever heard of this?”

Spoken in the most important tones that this pisher can muster.

Here comes Arianna Iwasinski. (Iwasinski!!!???” Who’s writing this shit? God? I hope so.)

“Kelly, people really need to listen up on this one…that’s because all kids need to experience these (BIG frowny face) `digital drugs’ are headphones, a computer and an mp3 player!” She then actually proves that she can count by moving her fingers to list them.

Only three things, eh?

SHIT!!! JUNIOR!!! GIMME those headphones!!!

Followed of course by images of teens doing what teens do…being a little goofy…interspersed with image captures from the web about this awful digital drug.

Then of course a hottest-thing-ever “law enforcement official from the Olahoma Bureau Of Narcotics” saying:

“Kids are gonna flock to these sites just to see what it’s about. And it …can lead them to other places.”

“It sounds like this” Arianna says…followed by what sounds to me like a Db sine wave an octave above middle C. Available on every synth made in the last 35 years or so.

And here comes Kelly Johnson…a parent and a teacher so she must be in the know, especially with her well-practiced pain face…saying “It’s scary. It’s just scary…one more thing to look out for.” Pain face obliterated by stupid smile. End of interview wif Ms. Kelly. But alla the other mommies out there? UH oh!!!

JUNIOR!!!???

Mustang, Oklahoma!!!???

The heartland? (You want to get really scared? These fools vote!!! And there are are lots of them.)

Oh, SHIT!!!

Then there’s Iwasinski-in-training student Meghan.

“I heard it was like…some weird like demons and stuff through a iPod…he was just freaking out…” says she with a Kelly Jr. dumb smile.

And then just more of the same. (GODDAMN they have bad teeth in Mustang, OK. The water? Maybe. Or…or…is it the fluoride!!!?)

Back to Meghan.

“Now another concern OBNDD has [OBNDD=The Oklahoma Board of Narcotics and Dangerous Drugs] is that many of these I-dosing websites lure visitors to actual drug and drug paraphernalia sites.“

As if Junior and Juniorette cain’t score in school anytime they want. Please.

Back to the original big daddy talking head. (Who says paternalism is dead? Turn on the TV to see the truth of the matter.)

“Parents just cannot let their guards down at all, can they?” Shake of the jowls, on to a commercial undoubtedly selling yet more debt and/or slow death by poison.

And here we end three minutes of media hypnosis about the dangers of media hypnosis.

Hmmm…

Catch 22 cubed?

1984 perfected?

Yup.

What have you watched recently with your critical faculties dimmed down by fatigue and/or maybe some ‘a them good ol’ legal depressants? And how many times in your post-awareness years (say from 14 on up) have you sopped up similar shit?

OH no!!!

You’re a leftiness person!!!

They cain’t get you!!!

Didja believe in Obama in 2007-2008? Hillary? Edwards? ANYBODY? Then they gotcha, baby!

If you have surrendered your mind for even one minute to the media hypnosis system, then they have their hooks in you. If you ever watch TV for more than about 15 minutes w/out either turning away from commercials and propaganda news sites or at the very least continually reminding yourself that they are all brought to you by the PermaGov, then you, sir or madam, are what we laughingly call “fucked” in my neighborhood.

“Not ME!!!”

Riiiight.

Wake the fuck up.

NEWSTRIKE!!!

MEDIASTRIKE!!!

CULTURESTRIKE!!!

VAYA!!!

You be bettah off.

And so will the rest of us.

Station WTFU signing off once again.

Gotta go get high on the internets.

YOU know…whut that crazed sex poodle Al Gore invented?

Yup.

Thet one.

See ya in Mustang, OK.

(It’s everywhere.)

OK!!!???  (Who is writing this shit? An alien plot is as believable as any other explanation. )

Later…

AG