Because it is the August recess in a non-election year in the second-term of an incumbent president, we are experiencing the absolute nadir of public interest in politics. Therefore, I must ask you the following questions. If you could eliminate from existence the necessity of one, but not both, of the following things, which would you choose, and why?
1. Shitting or pissing
2. Burping or farting
3. Diarrhea or vomiting
Do you think the results will vary depending on partisan affiliation?