Apparently. Conservative voices counseling for meaning and simplicity might as well pack it in. Stuff won the War on Christmas. No such thing as too much stuff for humans. The more stuff we have the more we want. If you resist, you’ll get weeks of non-stop news about people fighting for more stuff. Gray Thursday. Black Friday. It’s coming folks. The Christmas décor that went up in the stores weeks ago was the cue. Ready, Set, Go Shopping.
(GWB had his pulse on Americans. We’re not people but consumers. Go Shopping! It’s the multipurpose response to happiness, sadness, shock, and awe.)
Nostalgia for a time when Christmas had meaning is mostly a fiction. There was only less stuff and time needing to be filled in with something other than stuff. However, as quaint as it was, there was something lovely about children without stuff waking up one day a year to open a gaily wrapped box with a toy inside. Some without were even thrilled with a package containing a winter coat, new mittens, or socks. (Deadspin suggests that such children may now be fictional. Seen only in my faulty recollection of The Homecoming: A Christmas Story. Nope not there either.)
Sarah Palin not withstanding, the American consumer finds plenty of meaning in Christmas. “Madison Avenue” tells them so. And if that’s not enough for some, churches and charities do their own Christmas pickpocketing. The “Bah, humbug” folks engage in anti-meaning. Different strokes.
Yet, it’s difficult not to participate in many Christmas themed gifting activities that promise “meaning.” But mostly fail to deliver. What follows are nothing more than my own personal likes and dislikes.
The Office or Workplace.
The bad:
- Draw a name. Buy a gift. (Secret Santa is a more elaborate version.) May be a conventional holiday tradition I detest most. Ditto for holiday cards passed out to co-workers.
- Holiday lunch at a restaurant. There are two forms of this. “Pink collar” – employer allows an extra hour for lunch and employees can pay for and share a meal and drinks with co-workers. “White collar” – employer picks up the tab. Both are problematical, but for mostly for different reasons.
- Pass the hat to buy the boss a gift. Less common than #1 or #2. Should be banned.
The pleasant:
- Christmas Eve (or last work day before Christmas) sharing of snacks and/or treats. Never seen a bad one of these. If it includes a potluck breakfast or lunch with spouses and children invited (I enjoyed those very much), don’t muck it up with gifts for the children.
- Boss and professional staff gifting to assistants. Applies only when there is significant income disparity and the ratio of assistants to bosses isn’t high. Most importantly the gift regardless of size is best when it demonstrates thoughtfulness towards the recipient.
The good are improvements to or variations of the bad and pleasant. Mostly discovered serendipitously.
The only holiday lunch that I and most of my co-workers (the two “Ts” excluded) truly enjoyed was the one that almost didn’t happen. (The next year it was back to the stiff proceeding at a costly restaurant where the two “Ts” could order the most expensive thing on the menu and fou-fou drinks.) My job description didn’t include “in the absence of a manager, thou shall arrange the Christmas luncheon” in addition to keeping the whole damn boat afloat.
There was probably much whispering among the staff as to whether or not I had this covered. When it became totally obvious that I didn’t, one of them spoke up. After all the better restaurants had been booked. Fortunately, a distant memory from childhood floated up – an association between Christmas festivity and a Chinese restaurant. (No, I’m not Jewish that would have made it too easy.) A nearby, nice Chinese restaurant, again fortuitously, could accommodate us. The dishes we ordered were served in several rounds. Placed on the lazy-susans at the center of the table.. We shared. Joked. Laughed. And ate. The fun we were having was infectious. A couple of glum looking, obviously office, groups that arrived after us cheered up. The waiters became friendlier. Even one of the “Ts” brightened up and the other “T” made an effort to do so. Highly recommend a Chinese restaurant for an office Christmas lunch.
Or have it in March. Or send the support staff off to lunch on their own in the spring with the boss’ credit card. (The two “Ts” particularly liked that one.)
About those gifts for support staff. This is really easy for anyone like the two “Ts.” Both liked to shop and neither had much mad money. Gift cards are perfect if the card is for where they want to shop. Hit a home run first time out by getting one “T” a Macy’s card and the other “T” a Kohls’ card. Not sure if their faces lit up more when they received their gifts or when they shared what they bought for themselves. The cards were more like a burden to the other two who didn’t much like shopping. Both needed something more personalized. With a bit of listening later, neither was difficult to please. Other than being as generous and thoughtful as possible there are no rules for this.
If you do anything at all, do try to get it more right than wrong.
Charities – tomorrow.