(Originally written as a comment on Booman’s recent post The Republicans Welcome a Government Shutdown.)
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“GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN!!!” screams the news.
Wow!!!
I actually think that they should call this a “Citizen’s Holiday.” Like the old chant when school closed for the summer:
No more pencils, no more books! No more teacher’s dirty looks!
Like dat. Only bigger. Much bigger.
Read on for more.
Imagine a real shutdown.
Just for starters, legislators and the rest of the DC swamp wouldn’t get paid.
Neither would the members of the Armed Forces or all of the corporations that manufacture goods bought by the federal government.
The Swamp would dry up in no time!!!
But of course…they won’t actually let a real “shutdown” happen. That’d be bad for business, wouldn’t it. It will be a “shutdown” in name only…a false news shutdown with the media blaring about the hottest-thing-EVERness of the crisis while the backroom hustlers and their corporate bosses make the compromises necessary to keep their immensely lucrative con game in action.
A news cycle or two later?
Provided of course that some hostile power (And I include the entire corporate system of the (Untied States)…err, ahhh, of course I meant the United States…in that “hostile power” rubric. Maybe Trump, too, come to think of it.)…provided that some hostile power doesn’t take advantage of the hustle to run its own hustle on the country?
Another hottest-thing-ever story will be ginned up to keep the news cycle’s wheels profitably spinning and the rubes’ eyes on the wrong hand of the carny barker.
Later…I’m gonna ignore this shit.
You should too.
AG
P.S. Pence is taking a plane trip.
Oh.
How…convenient!!!
The House is taking a few days off.
WHAT? ME WORRY?
NAAAAAAAHHH…
They just want YOU to worry.
They’ll be back in time to collect their paychecks and other less….reputable…payoffs.
Bet on it.
So…cheer up, folks.
Unless somebody lights off a successful EMP (electromagnetic pulse) bomb over Kansas City or somewhere else central and puts the whole country on “shutdown?”
Ain’t gonna happen.
Now back to the really big news!!!
TRUMP LIKES TO FUCK WHORES!!!
I’m shocked!!!
Shocked, I say!!!
GTFU.
(Grow the fuck up.)