Booman has become a dedicated centrist. (Read his most recent Obama apologia for absolute proof of the matter: Right Back Atcha.)
A rough translation and condensation of the piece?
Sure. Here’s one.
“Either/or, both have their merits. Harrumph, harrumph!!!”
And so on.
So sad!!!
Why?
Because there are a number of problems with centrism in general, that’s why.
Read on for more.
Much more.
The most basic problem with a centrist stance like this is that nothing is ever “either/or.” They are only “either/or” in a two-dimensional world, at best. You…know…like two party Permanent Government politics?
It’s a free country. You got yer choice. DemRats or RatPubs. What more could’ya want? Now go out and vote!!!
Like dat.
In reality there are always other dimensions to be considered.
Another problem is that…as we have seen so clearly during Obama’s entire presidency…once one is fully enmeshed in “centrism,” further movement becomes nearly impossible. The phrase “Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right. Here I am, stuck in the middle with you” very nicely sums up that centrist predicament.
Obama’s problems?
Quite plainly right there in the bridge of this song:
Oh well you started off with nothing,
And you’re proud that you’re a self-made man,
(Yeah you are)
And your friends, they all come callin’,
Slap you on the back and say,
“Please… Please…”
(Come on!!!)
Please!!!
C’mon, Booman.
It’s all over but the shouting.
“NEXT!!!???” say the kingmakers as they fill their red, white and blue balloons with nothing but hot air.
“Who’s next in the barrel? Step right up!!!”
Meanwhile, back at the ranch…here’s another centrist problem. The worst one of all.
No matter which way you look, you are always surrounded.
Up, down, back and forth, side-to-side…surrounded like a motherfucker!!!
As Socrates Fortlow…perhaps my all-time favorite fictional character…found out, you are Always Outnumbered, Always Outgunned in the center of things.
Anxiety-producing, to say the least.
A terrible place to be.
Bet on it.
Move on, Booman.
Move on.
This approach simply ain’t working.
The center turns us all into jokers.
“Punchlines of the world, unite!!!” say the controllers.
From outside of the circle, of course.
Way outside. (Like Mike Bloomberg’s little Bermuda getaway above.)
Bet on it.
WTFU?
SUAF!!! (“Stand Up and Fight!!!”, goddammit.)
VAYA!!!
AG
