Well folks I honestly had a super slow day at work and so I thought I’d do something that’s fun – or at least for me it’s fun.
I’ve been working and doing all kinds of stuff besides blogging (and I know some people think that’s just fine hehe) but for me well I miss it. It gets in your blood.
So today was a slow day for me and I’ve got a new computer and I finally managed to set up my various RSS feeds just like I want so what follows is the result.
Please don’t take it too seriously as it’s just me having some fun.
Oh by the way, as always, I don’t cover Iraq or Israel.
Thanks!
At the World Economic Forum being held now in Davos, internet leaders are warning that criminals may “overwhelm the web”. And no they’re not talking about the United States government.
The little war that will not end anytime soon in Somalia has left one Ethiopian soldier dead after fighting in Kismayo. Meanwhile there are new reports that American airstrikes have been renewed somewhere in southern Somalia.
Taking advantage of the chaos, two Somali tribal militias have resumed their feudin’ and a fightin’ around Goobo as soon as the Ethiopian troops moved out, leaving at least 8 people injured.
For shits and giggles, but mostly giggles, the American military has just demonstrated its new “pain ray” gun. The good news is that it won’t be on the market for use against innocent civilians until about 2010. The bad news is the glee of the onlookers at yesterday’s demonstration:
While the sudden, 130-degree Fahrenheit (54-degree Celsius) heat was not painful, it was intense enough to make participants think their clothes were about to ignite.
“This is one of the key technologies for the future,” said Marine Col. Kirk Hymes, director of the non-lethal weapons program which helped develop the new weapon.
In jolly old Malaysia, a government controlled newspaper has sued a local blogger for defamation and even the blogger’s lawyer is saying the lawsuit is “impossible to defend”.
In poor old forgotten Haiti, UN troops continue to enter into gun battles with citizens that have left at least 5 dead and 12 wounded. The UN says the dead and wounded were all “likely” gang members (and so therefore not human beings) but at least 3 of the wounded were women.
Hard chargin’ freedom lovin’ Pervez “The Pervert” Musharraf, the president for life of Pakistan is hopping mad about reports that Mullah Omar and top Taliban leaders live in his country and regularly cross the border with aid from the Pak military. Definitely worth reading the entire thing.
Pervert is in the UAE at the moment but back at home in South Waziristan, the ongoing insurgency continues with multiple rocket and IED attacks and “several” government employees were kidnapped.
Pervert is also steamed about one of his own troops getting killed by NATO troops as they chased the Hazzard boys from Afghanistan across the Pakistani county line in “hot pursuit”. And of course you know the bad guys got away.
Over in western Afghanistan there are reports of tension as Iran has been financing reconstruction and development around the city of Herat, home to the Shi’ite and underdog ethnic Hazara peoples.
While Fouad “Hey” Siniora is on his knees begging for cash in Paris, back in Lebanon the capital is under curfew after rioting left 4 people dead and 150 injured.
The military in the Philippines is now stating that during Jan 16 clash with Abu Sayyaf insurgents, they managed to wing Dulmatin, a local lad who has a 10 million dollar bounty on his head by the United States.
Unidentified American “agents” from an unknown agency last summer allegedly stopped a Russian man in the capital of Georgia who allegedly had a nugget of uranium in a plastic bag in his pocket. Yeah I’m sure. Here’s what the BBC doesn’t tell you:
The Russian, Oleg Khinsagov, a shabbily dressed 50-year-old trader who specialized in fish and sausages, authorities allege, tried to sell a small amount of nuclear-bomb grade uranium in a plastic bag in his jacket pocket.
In jolly old Nigeria, which isn’t in the middle of a civil war but is instead suffering from widespread sectarian violence and popular revolt, three Chinese oil workers were kidnapped and an additional 7 Chinese workers are unaccounted for. This brings the total number of foreigners being held hostage by the MEND to 32, including an American (named Billy Graham believe it or not) and a British guy. Not that anyone cares of course.
Fun-lovin’ domestic terrorists in Greece say they will attack more targets and called the current government a bunch of bootlickers for hosting NATO and American military bases. The grenade attack on the American embassy a couple of weeks ago has been officially dedicated to the Iraqi resistance.
Good news out of perpetually ignored Guinea as strongman Lansana “Live Forever” Conte has made a few minor concessions to end the rioting and striking that has paralyzed this country.
Hey what happens when there’s a war going on and nobody pays attention? Why then it doesn’t count and therefore neither do the deaths of 3 soldiers in Kashmir who were blown up by a bomb.
Some good and decent news for once as Angola has now completely destroyed all 114,000 stockpiled landmines. Mind you, that’s just the stockpiled ones. The country was wracked by a civil war for 27 years and literally one third of the country is unsafe to enter because of old landmines.
Sadly over in Kabul Afghanistan two children were killed by an old tank shell while playing on the grounds of an bombed-out military barracks.
They say it’s a genocide but nobody really gives a rip about Darfur, where the fun-lovin’ Sudanese government has been using air attacks to bomb meetings of UN and African Union personnel.
I’m sure it’s an awful coincidence but the recently appointed Defense Minister of Ecuador, Guadalupe Larriva, was killed in an air crash along with her daughter and 5 soldiers.
Larriva, leader of the Socialists, openly opposed the presence of US troops in the country and US anti-drug operations. [Recently elected President Rafael] Correa himself has pledged not to renew the US military presence at the Manta air base in 2009.
Better stay off small planes there Rafe.
Now it’s time for some bird flu news. Fresh outbreak in southeastern Hungary. Suspected case of human infection in Azerbaijan. 8 year innocent child dies of it in Indonesia making her the sixth death this month alone. Another 5 people in Indonesia, including 3 children, are in the hospital with symptoms. And a fresh outbreak in northeastern Thailand amongst domesticated chickens.
The cheerful coupsters in Thailand had their health minister announce that the government would issue licenses for generic versions of medications to treat AIDS and heart disease. Drug companies “reacted angrily”.
30 years after illegally bombing the bejeesus out of Cambodia, an American warship will make a visit starting on February 9. Meanwhile the American U.S. Pacific Commander has offered to “help” the jovial Cambodian military with training and “non-lethal” assistance.
The high-spirited and ever-mirthful military dictator of Fiji, Voreque “Frank” Bainimarama has knuckled under to pressure from Australia and New Zealand to not impose retaliatory trade sanctions.
The gentle dictatorship of Singapore has just signed a number of economic agreements with good old Uzbekistan.
Speaking of which, Uzbek president Islam “Boil ‘Em” Karimov may not even legally be in office anymore under a technicality. Except that of course no one can do anything about it.
Hey wait this can’t be true, can it? Iran has announced it is cooperating fully with IAEA inspectors.
I don’t know how to interpret this exactly but Donald Tsang, the Beijing-installed leader of Hong Kong, wants the territory to become (again) a “full democracy” within the next 5 years.
In Italy it is now against the law to express unapproved opinions about World War 2.
Russia is gettin’ even jiggier with India as the two nations signed a number of agreements, including one to build 4 additional units at an Indian nuclear power reactor.
The civil war in Sri Lanka continues unabated as the Sea Tigers battled Sri Lankan Naval units near Mannar.
In the Gambia, President Yahya “Webe” Jammeh is confident his ruling party will come out ahead in parliamentary elections.
Fighting continues in India‘s Assam state, leaving at least one person dead after a bomb exploded in Borhapjan. Two more were killed in a bombing in Guwahati. Assam is under heavy police crackdown for tomorrow’s “Republic Day” celebration.
The good news out of Nepal is that it is likely the king’s image will be removed from the currency and replaced with an image of Buddha. The bad news out of Nepal is that dozens of people have been injured in clashes in the southeast between different ethnicities.
The president of Indonesia, Susilo Bambang “Yoko Ono” Yudhoyono urged the government to crack down harder on Islamic militants in Sulawesi.
American troops will be in jolly old Tajikstan later this month to train the military in “anti-terrorism tactics”. You’ve got to read a Russian newspaper to even hear about this.
Former American puppet, drug runner and CIA stooge, Manuel Noriega will return to his home country of Panama 18 years after he was abducted by the U.S. in an illegal war:
[Noriega] turned the 12,000-strong Panama Defence Force into a mafia-style operation and founded the western hemisphere’s first “narco-kleptocracy” – a regime powered and propped up by drug profits. Colombia’s notorious Medellin drug cartel paid him multi-million dollar bribes for his assistance in shipping tons of cocaine to the US.
Yet the US looked the other way, retaining him on the CIA payroll to the tune of £51,000 a year in return for favours that spanned two decades and four US presidencies.
He allowed Washington to channel funds, and reportedly weapons, through him to pro-American forces in Nicaragua and El Salvador; assisted the US in finding safe refuge for the exiled Shah of Iran and let America set up regional eavesdropping posts on his territory.
British PM Tony Blair evidently decided the parliament’s debate on Iraq yesterday was so boring that he didn’t bother to attend.
Here’s some fun news off a religious website: former CIA chief James Woolsey said that the Israeli-Palestinian peace process is a “scam”.
One hospital in France is considering a proposal to put electronic monitoring devices on all newborns to prevent a “plague” of baby trafficking.
And last but not least, volunteers and others have been combing the beach in southwestern Britain to rescue wildlife covered in oil after tens of thousands of gallons of oil leaked from a cargo ship.
Pax
