Sad news for BMT-ers, found in today’s Washington Post

Michigan J. Frog, the 1950s Warner Bros. contract player best known for his top hat, cane and ragtime songs, is dead, killed by the WB network for whom he had been working as a mascot, The TV Column has learned.

Darwin, BMT spokesfrog and personal friend of Michigan Frog, commented through a spokesperson:

This is a sad day for all amphibia and amphibiophiles.  With the threats we already face from habitat destruction and pollution, to also be the victim of age discrimination is to just add insult to injury.

Sadly, it appears that the charge of age discrimination may be correct.  As indicated by the WaPo:

Mr. Frog would have turned 50 in December.

WB targets 12- to 34-year-olds. You do the math.

But WB suits, onstage to discuss their new prime-time shows starring Sara Gilbert, Jay Baruchel, Rebecca Romijn and even Don Johnson, insisted Mr. Frog’s demise had not been the work of ageists.

In fact, they had the crust to suggest that Mr. Frog got snuffed because he skewed too young.

Back in the mid-’90s, when the WB was launched with programming specifically targeting teens and young adults, it decided not to employ a serious network TV logo — such as an eyeball or a peacock — but instead to dust off from the Warner Bros. vault an animated frog (created by the same guy who’d given us Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Porky Pig and Pepe Le Pew) that, they reasoned, would appeal to younger viewers.

Unfortunately, it worked too well, and coupled with the fact that so many stars of WB’s prime-time hits were in high school, the network once known as the WB, or the Frog, became known as That Teen Network, not friendly to anyone over 20. This limited the network’s growth among the young adult set, which did not sit well with the Old Men of Time Warner.

Tributes poured in from across Hollywood and around the world for the late Mr. Frog.  A sampling:

“He was the best.  A consummate professional.  And when he would sing, ze very birds would turn le green with ze envy.” – Pepe Le Pew

“Speaking as a toad in danger of losing my job myself, I think it is totally irresponsible what happened to poor Michigan.  He should have sought out competent counsel.  And people think Washington is a cutthroat town!” – Karl Rove

“Can I have his legs?” – Hannibal Lector

Warner Brothers executives declined at first to comment regarding a rumored lawsuit to be brought by the World Wildlife Fund, but when pressed on the matter declared:

“Bring ’em on.  With Judge Roberts on the Supreme Court we’re not afraid of any stinkin’ amphibia.”

PETA protesters in Hollywood poured catsup on Michigan’s star on the “Hollywood Sidewalk of the Stars” while singing “We shall Overcome.”  A spokesperson for the group, tears streaming down his ski-masked face, defiantly declared for TV cameras, “This will not stand!”

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